A typically dormant geyser at Yellowstone has erupted three times in the past six weeks, prompting a mix of delight and horror among local residents and tourists. "It's obscene," remarked one woman shielding her child's eyes. "I don't know what's gotten into this world!" Records show that the geyser hadn't erupted since 2014 and hasn't had this many sequential eruptions since the early 2000s. "Frankly, I'm happy for Steamboat. Let a geyser live a little!" implored one of the park geologists, Stanley Rose. "I'm sure that it hasn't been easy for the world's largest geyser to hold all that in for so long." At press time, Mother Earth was not available for comment, but could be heard sighing contentedly.