Q&A ARCHIVE WINTER 2018 - WINTER 2021
Why don't you want to be famous?
why don't you want someone to hammer a nail into your foot?
When is the last time you were in a monogamous relationship and how long did it last?
2005-2012
hey hey hey heeeeeeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyy can u post the video of u with wayne bradyyyy? thx
my episode of Let's Make a Deal is a special Tony Awards episode meant to air the Friday before the Sunday Tonys and the Tonys have been postponed indefinitely, so i'm not sure when it will air
Which lives don't matter?
you decide
what drugs should i experiment with in quarantine
love
Where in the world did you get the idea that you can be anything in this world?
everywhere
my dad is a child molestor
perhaps your dad will die a slow and painful death like mine did
People say to me "everything is going to be okay" but they don't know if that is true or not. They're just saying that to try and make me feel better. I fucking hate it.
that's true... only you can decide whether things are or ever will be okay or not or even what 'okay' means
I told someone five years ago that I never want to talk to them again for the rest of my life, but I changed my mind and I would like to talk to them now. What should I do?
i suppose you could contact them to ask if they'd like to have a conversation with you about all the things that you've both changed your mind about between then and now
you have a beautiful voice and it makes me feel safe when I listen to you sing so thank you for singing and sharing it
thank you for listening
WHY HAVEN'T YOU TAKEN THIS WEBSITE DOWN YET YOU FUCKING INSANE CUNT? I'M GOING TO GUT YOU LIKE THE FAT NASTY PIG YOU ARE YOU BITCH
i've gained about 15 pounds so far this year, so be sure and bring a few extra plates for the gutting
Not to be a nuisance, but you haven't updated the Play page with lyrics yet.
thank you for the reminder
what should i put on the ceiling
lamps
Is it okay that I am asexual? Are you asexual?
my three best friends are asexual and they are the three best people i know... i have no idea if those two things are correlated or not... i am not asexual
I saw you linked to my video on YouTube! Thank you!
i don't know which one was yours, but it must have inspired me in some way, so great job and you're welcome
Should I wear a mask?
have you ever taken it off?
That story about Megan's dad is horrific. I'm so sorry. He seems like a wonderful man. Why would he do something like that? I've never even heard that people could kill themselves that way. It seems like the most painful way to go. There are no words and I'm just really sorry for everyone. I love you, Grace.
<3
If you could take one of your neuro-atypical traits and make it a neuro-typical trait, what would it be and why?
i wish i didn't need to rock myself back and forth for hours at a time in order to process things... though i have been able to pick and choose when/where to 'stim', the need to do it at least daily (and often before sleep) complicates romantic relationships (can't really share a bed as comfortably/regularly as non-autistic people can) and it just takes up a lot of time in my life that could be used for other things
How do I find someone who will love me for me?
step one: locate a mirror
What's the new obsession?
raccoons
Favorite artist of the 2020s so far?
you
What do you miss most during quarantine?
the freedom to have someone openly cough into my mouth in a crowded target
Where did your Twitter go?
social media distancing
I have never been more lonely in my entire life. Now I'm typing into a random stranger's suggestion comment box just to feel like I have someone to talk to. Fuck, what is even the point of anything?
hi
i really liked the answer "let go of your attachment to hell" thanks
this entire website is just a place for me to try to work my own endless existential shit out, so i'm always surprised and heartened when someone else gets something out of it, too... (thank you)
What is the last song you listened to ? this is what i just listened to - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CKSvY4ya0Lk
i clicked on that and listened to it, so now that is the last song that i listened to... A+ selection, josh turner is a really neat human being who has been doing lovely things for a long time
I can't be sure, but I think you answered one of my really old questions recently. Did you go back or did someone ask the same thing? Either way, thanks! Hope you and your family are well.
i have a pile of submissions from this page and i don't put them on this page in any particular order... some i don't respond to at all, some i respond to weeks later, some i immediately respond to... this page is about as disorganized as it could be, but i'm a selfish stupid whore, so be sure and keep your expectations low
lolololol i can't stop singing she's so fucking dumb ahhhhAHHHHAHHHHH hahahahahahha
we all are fucking dumb... and if you think she's dumb, you should check out me or even yourself in the mirror... amazing how fucking selfish and stupid we all are sometimes... i reach new levels of it all the time and i wouldn't see it in her if i didn't have twice as much of it in myself, i assure you
What part of "LOVE OTHERS" is the part where you tell someone's wife that she's "fucking stupid" and a "selfish stupid whore"?
that improvised song really falls more under the category of 'be honest'... and if i'm being honest, sometimes i don't love others (or myself)... hopefully i will 'keep growing' until i get there, but obviously still a long long way to go
Am I essential?
yes, absolutely
Are you a mean girl?
i am whatever you think i am
omfg tattoo artist for teeth lmao is that real
yes, it's pretty interesting and unique for sure
In the past decade, have you ever gone longer than a year without having sex?
no
Those who would trade liberty for security deserve neither.
with liberty comes responsibility... those who would use their liberty to stomp out the vulnerable instead of sacrifice for them... need to perhaps reconsider
Did you get laid off because of the rona?
no, i actually got a raise
Could you put the lyrics up to the songs on the play page? I want to sing along sometimes and I'm not sure I'm saying the right words.
that's a good idea and i will try to get to it soon, but if you have any questions in the meantime, you can ask here and that might be faster
Will you marry me?
sorry, i'm all out of goats for the dowry
Are you a good or a bad person?
and
i love you
that's what they all say
How does the collaboration with you and Mitch work? Do you come up with a song and then he comes up with lyrics or do you both come up with parts of it? Who plays what instruments? Do you record it live in a studio somewhere?
he makes the songs and i translate them into english
Why do you like to be alive?
fresh wonder
Hey, I just wanted to say that I'm sorry.
it's okay
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU
the fuck
Is it Easter yet?
you decide
So are you working for the census now?
i am the census
thanks for the row your boat wisdom can i have another
stop, collaborate, and listen
How do I get to heaven?
let go of your attachment to hell
What was your highlight of 2019
it was a tie between getting to know me and getting to know you
WHORE
ah, yes... i missed you, too
Is it tough being so awesome?
sometimes i become so full of awe that i completely short circuit
What's the password for the play page?
my locker combination
Where did you go and why can't I get into the play page anymore?
time out
You've come a long way since "I only know three chords"= it makes me think that maybe you knew more than three chords all along?
more than three chords know me, i can tell you that much
How can I let go of my soon-to-be-ex-wife? We have been separated for a year-and-a-half, and my love for her is just as potent as it was on the day we separated. There have been times I've resented her, even hated her, but the feelings of love always return. I deeply failed her as a husband and don't blame her for kicking my ass to the curb, but God I miss her. And my heart still flutters when I see her.
you're human, and so is she... forgive yourself, forgive her... there will be other balloons and your instincts will be just as horrendous then as they probably were before, but hopefully some piece of this pain will remain with you so that you can make better choices next time... if not, though, you'll try again and again until you figure it out... that's all we're here on this earth to do, i think... to keep trying again and again and again (and again) until we figure it out
Work for the census! It's a job that only happens every 10 years!
that sounds like a good idea
How are you feeling?
great! never better! you?
Hey ! I'm the guy from a long time ago who ask you about what signs you parked near when you worked at the construction and I'm wondering what sign you park to at your new work ?
this
okay now what
sing
What the fuck is going on?
everything, at least once
What's it gonna be like when all of our consciencousness is uploaded to a shared cloud and we can just not even have to use words to talk and just know each other's feelings just by looking or feeling them together or whatever? Elon Musk says we will have that capability by 2050.
i bet, initially, a lot of folks are going to be absolutely fucking floored by the enormous chasm between what people have said about how they're feeling and what people have actually been feeling
Let's take a nap?
that sounds nice
You're never going to be successful if you don't take a leap and move to New York City. Moving from the middle of nowhere to New York City was the best decision I ever made. I had to leave a lot of family and friends behind, but I've made a lot of new ones and it was worth it to be able to reach the success I have now. You can't reach success trying to bat from the bleachers... have you not noticed that every single person you admire moved to New York City? Most people live a life of mediocrity. If that's what you want, then fine. But I think it's an enormous waste of your gifts and what you're capable of.
you clearly have no idea who i admire and i suspect that you have no idea what success is
Did you know that Lexapro makes your dick stop working? Because Lexapro makes your dick stop working.
i do not have a dick and have no experience with lexapro, which is (i assume?) a drug of some kind and not just the name of a mean giant that punches you in the dick?
Are your needs in spring and summer are different than your needs in fall and winter or they always the same?
sometimes i wear sandals and sometimes i wear boots, depending on the needs of my feet at any given time/temperature
Which attachment style are you: anxious, avoidant, anxious-avoidant, or secure?
thank you for taking this buzzfeed quiz! your spirit animal is: tiger
What was the person talking about who was saying stuff about you hanging out with a homeless guy?
pretty sure it was a reference to the caption/set of photos here, which was a reference to this
any thoughts on taking mental health medications or therapy or illegal drug use or electroshock or screaming until you lose your voice or running naked through the streets?
do whatever you need to do to stay in the game [tldr; don't die]
What's the last question you asked yourself?
how the hell did i not know that tyler's family was on family feud like four times back in the day???
The problem is that I cannot produce anything when I get into the darkest places. I can't take my broken heart and make it art when I can't even move. I can't even breathe. There aren't any words left. I can't make something out of nothing when I can't even explain how I feel.
you just made something right now by writing this and i'm proud of you
He's an idiot.
aren't we all
Should I get a roommate?
could be nice
Hey, I just wanted to say fuck that person who called you a cunt. They clearly do not know you and you are one of the most inspirational people I've ever met. You are very loved and you always will be. I hope they get help, because they are clearly fucking awful.
thanks... but, i'm definitely a self-righteous cunt sometimes, so i don't mind the reminder :)
Have you seen these? How does he have such unbelievable fearlessness?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_3LbtAP-AoE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QE7XssZc4pc
probably just balancing himself out after unbelievable fearfulness at another time
Should I lock up my partner to make sure that they don't ever leave me?
be the best person you could ever be and they won't need to leave and you won't care if they do
Since you record everything, do you record yourself having sex with people? Can I hear it?
there are lots of instances on this website and elsewhere of me making love with people
You are such a self-righteous cunt. You hung out with a homeless guy and you want an award? Fuck you. You could have at least got him somewhere to stay. But you just wanted to use him for an instagram post. More bonus points for you. I see through that shit.
i wanted to invite him to the airbnb, but it was not my house and therefore not my right to do that... it's important to me to document my days and my journeys right now, but i'm actually doing my best not to publicize it broadly while still having a few people follow along if they would like and they can get anything out of it... i'm sorry the journey i'm going on is making you so upset, but all i can do is suggest you go on your own journey and ignore mine completely
Why do you want to hold hands with strangers?
to prove that no one is a stranger
ANSWER MY FUCKING QUESTIONS YOU IGNORANT CUNT
size does matter, but not of the organ you're thinking of
What did you win on Let's Make a Deal?
confirmation and direction
How do I tell the girl I love that I love her?
show her
Do you have a secret admirer?
everyone does
Why aren't you famous?
good luck and protection from good friends
LOS ANGELES
it's like every city you've ever been to, but with 200% more celebrities and dead people laying in the street
Do you drink coffee or tea?
no
How do I find the perfect job?
HAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA change it every 60-90 days and become a professional job changer
poop butthole poop with the butts butts when i squeeze the shit out going oout the butthole to the toilet and out it goes down to the adventure through te plumbing system metal and the tubes and where am i going traveling along hellop mr pee pee and toothpaste and traveling we are coming with tme to the oddyssey and is it sanitation and the filter and back int he faucet and i'm drinking the poop when i turn on the sink and it's deliciouis poop woooooo
good work documenting the journey! keep it up
Do you think you have the capability of monogamy?
i have the capability of nogamy!
what do mental illnessssssssssss
try them all out for research purposes and select the one(s) that are best for you
Why do you like game shows so much?
light, color, music, gifts, puzzles, joy
Do you think you are wise? Is that why you have a questions page?
i think you are wise and i have an answers page because you are the answer
Why would anyone want to crawl out of love?
to experience falling back in?
Do you know any other languages?
other languages know me
Why does my earwax smell like chocolate
block age
What is one thing you've learned about yourself in 2019 that you did not know about yourself in 2018?
i want to hold your hand
I know all of your secrets.
NICE! could you tell me some of them, because i'm sure i forgot
You said there are Easter eggs on this website. Tell me where to find some! I have been looking all over and clicking on periods and whatever and I'm not finding anything.
i honestly don't remember where they all are, although i know for sure there was one in the 'write' post about easter eggs... not really the job of the bunny to find the eggs for you
What city shoudl I go work in?
universe city
What's the best prize of all?
sir
When are you going to game show number two?
already went, but there will be more after that
You want us to seek. But what are you seeking?
see king
Weekend plans?
tend the garden
Favorite fall activity?
trust
WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT
i want to fuck the whole world relentlessly in the brain stem until its heart cums for the rest of eternity
ur writing is so good that i feel like if i don't do my words just right u will judge me n say im stupid n worthless
that's okay... i feel that way about music/musicians
How do I avoid contacting my ex? It's so tempting sometimes.
go back and find/compile all the most hurtful things they ever said or did to you and hang it somewhere where you can see it and then when you're tempted to see them through rose-colored glasses, read through the facts again... it might not always work, but it will hopefully pull you back from the ledge at least a bit
Do you ever have recurring dreams or nightmares and if so what are they?
all my teeth suddenly turning thin/fragile and falling out... haven't had that one in a long time, though
When in the Course of human events it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation. We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. — That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, — That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security. — Such has been the patient sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Government. The history of the present King of Great Britain is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these States. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world. He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good. He has forbidden his Governors to pass Laws of immediate and pressing importance, unless suspended in their operation till his Assent should be obtained; and when so suspended, he has utterly neglected to attend to them. He has refused to pass other Laws for the accommodation of large districts of people, unless those people would relinquish the right of Representation in the Legislature, a right inestimable to them and formidable to tyrants only. He has called together legislative bodies at places unusual, uncomfortable, and distant from the depository of their Public Records, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with his measures. He has dissolved Representative Houses repeatedly, for opposing with manly firmness his invasions on the rights of the people. He has refused for a long time, after such dissolutions, to cause others to be elected, whereby the Legislative Powers, incapable of Annihilation, have returned to the People at large for their exercise; the State remaining in the mean time exposed to all the dangers of invasion from without, and convulsions within. He has endeavoured to prevent the population of these States; for that purpose obstructing the Laws for Naturalization of Foreigners; refusing to pass others to encourage their migrations hither, and raising the conditions of new Appropriations of Lands. He has obstructed the Administration of Justice by refusing his Assent to Laws for establishing Judiciary Powers. He has made Judges dependent on his Will alone for the tenure of their offices, and the amount and payment of their salaries. He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harass our people and eat out their substance. He has kept among us, in times of peace, Standing Armies without the Consent of our legislatures. He has affected to render the Military independent of and superior to the Civil Power. He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution, and unacknowledged by our laws; giving his Assent to their Acts of pretended Legislation: For quartering large bodies of armed troops among us: For protecting them, by a mock Trial from punishment for any Murders which they should commit on the Inhabitants of these States: For cutting off our Trade with all parts of the world: For imposing Taxes on us without our Consent: For depriving us in many cases, of the benefit of Trial by Jury: For transporting us beyond Seas to be tried for pretended offences: For abolishing the free System of English Laws in a neighbouring Province, establishing therein an Arbitrary government, and enlarging its Boundaries so as to render it at once an example and fit instrument for introducing the same absolute rule into these Colonies For taking away our Charters, abolishing our most valuable Laws and altering fundamentally the Forms of our Governments: For suspending our own Legislatures, and declaring themselves invested with power to legislate for us in all cases whatsoever. He has abdicated Government here, by declaring us out of his Protection and waging War against us. He has plundered our seas, ravaged our coasts, burnt our towns, and destroyed the lives of our people. He is at this time transporting large Armies of foreign Mercenaries to compleat the works of death, desolation, and tyranny, already begun with circumstances of Cruelty & Perfidy scarcely paralleled in the most barbarous ages, and totally unworthy the Head of a civilized nation. He has constrained our fellow Citizens taken Captive on the high Seas to bear Arms against their Country, to become the executioners of their friends and Brethren, or to fall themselves by their Hands. He has excited domestic insurrections amongst us, and has endeavoured to bring on the inhabitants of our frontiers, the merciless Indian Savages whose known rule of warfare, is an undistinguished destruction of all ages, sexes and conditions. In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Prince, whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people. Nor have We been wanting in attentions to our British brethren. We have warned them from time to time of attempts by their legislature to extend an unwarrantable jurisdiction over us. We have reminded them of the circumstances of our emigration and settlement here. We have appealed to their native justice and magnanimity, and we have conjured them by the ties of our common kindred to disavow these usurpations, which would inevitably interrupt our connections and correspondence. They too have been deaf to the voice of justice and of consanguinity. We must, therefore, acquiesce in the necessity, which denounces our Separation, and hold them, as we hold the rest of mankind, Enemies in War, in Peace Friends. We, therefore, the Representatives of the united States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That these united Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States, that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Great Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent States, they have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace, contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may of right do. — And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of Divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes, and our sacred Honor.
wow... who the fuck are they calling 'merciless indian savages'???
Why don't you do drugs?
drugs do me
What are your goals?
#goals
What if I never find love?
be the love that finds someone else
what happens when i put something here
now you know! wasn't that fun? i wonder what else is possible?
How do I tell the girl I like that I like her?
try a way that you've never tried before
Are you married?
are you?
What's that sound?
fire alarm
Will you write a book someday? You're an amazing writer and people should hear your stories.
i prefer to tell stories one at a time as they happen... if someone wants to compile them someday or redistribute them, they are more than welcome to as long as they don't edit it or sell it
Why are you scared of the internet?
have you seen it?
u r fake and gay
aren't we all
What's the stupidest thing you can't stop doing?
reading internet comments
Hey, Gracie. Drink some water. I love you.
thank you
Just saw the new honor page update. I'm so sorry for your loss, Grace. But, it wasn't your fault. You know that. You did everything you could. Also, fuck your shitty dad in heaven.
oh, it's all of our losses, for sure... also, your ending made me lol in the midst of tears, A+
my mum told me I am accident . now i sads
imagine how folks conceived by rape feel
How many commandments have you broken?
i'm pretty sure that i broke all of them before i hit 21
you are sexually attracted to white dudes with four letter first names
<jesus and satan give each other resigned glances and walk away in disappointment>
Do you ever record songs and not post them online?
yes
TELL THAT ONE GUY TO STOP SCREAMING AT YOU WHAT THE FUCK
who says it's a guy?
you're really something else
that's true
Let's lay on a blanket and listen to the air on our ear lobes and say nothing until we both die.
where?
I DO NOT LOVE YOU AND I NEVER LOVED YOU AND I WILL NEVER LOVE YOU
i know
Is your reddit name abstractstrategy because you play those kinds of games??
what kind of games?
Your voice is really delicate.
when?
How do I quit cigarettes? I fucking LOVE cigarettes.
why would you want to quit something you love?
I went exploring in a cave and now my arm is stuck under a boulder.
is there a sharp object around?
Did you get Easter for your birthday?
easter got me... always does
i like your questions page better than the bill wurtz questions page
this is not a questions page
MAKE ME LAUGH CLOWN
can i phone a friend?
There's nothing wrong with crying! I cry when I'm happy sometimes too. They don't have words for that emotion.
there are lots of emotions that don't seem to have words, and that's probably where art/music/theatre/etc come in
Have you ever fallen out of love with someone?
you can't fall out of love, you can only fall in... getting out is usually a slow crawl
Will you ever be satisfied?
i was going to say 'i hope so', but now that i think about it, probably not until i'm dead... and probably not then either
Any music recommendations?
i stumbled onto this today and i love it because the title suggests you're getting one thing, but you're actually getting much more
How many visitors per day do you have on this website? More than 1000? Less than 10? Why don't you promote it more?
the site only works if it's just between the two of us
What is something beautiful you saw today?
there was a woman and man at the bus stop and the woman was holding the man's hand and looking up at him like he hung the moon and he looked like he had about three pennies to his name and i am quite sure he was the richest man i've ever seen
I would like to get you Easter for your birthday. Where can I buy Easter?
easter cannot be purchased
This box is really big. I'm not sure there's any limit as to what I put in here. Everyone else seems to just write one thing or one question, but they could write a whole novel in here if they wanted. Why do people limit themselves so much? WhY Do TheY dO eVeRythInG tHe WAAAAAAY it has been done B4?
inertia
I did 9/11.
i'm proud of you... next up, try 9/12
Give me something to do today?
move (forward, if at all possible... baby steps count)
Is your vagina dead?
not that i'm aware of
Did you know that your birthday falls on the 240th day of the year?
i did not know that
any advice for me
go where the love is
What do you want for your birthday?
easter
heads or tails?
heads
How many of these questions do you write yourself?
all of them except this one
WHAT??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
EXACTLY
what??????????????????????????????????????????????????????
exactly
What aren't you afraid of?
you
YOU ARE NASTY SLUT WHORE CUNT WHO CANNOT BE TRUSTED
seems legit
more songs please
more patience please
What is your goal for the Let's Make a Deal trip?
same as it was for The Price is Right... send out a message to those who feel forgotten and invisible that someone sees them
How many answers do you have?
somewhere between zero and one
Why am I so sad?
you haven't started the list of why you're so happy yet
What was the biggest difference between France and the US?
for me, the most notable thing was the lack of awkwardness/shame surrounding sex in france... people were being physically affectionate everywhere you looked, condom dispensers were readily available on every street corner, and the morning after pill was accessible (in the airport even!) for very little cost in five minutes with no questions asked
Did you experience any culture shock in France?
i think my experience there was a bit unusual, as i was with americans/brits/australians who spoke english pretty much the entire time, so i didn't experience as much 'shock' as i might have otherwise
it was sweet when you said you feel things in big ways and that's okay. What was the last thing that made you cry tears of happy?
i'm not sure this counts as a full-fledged cry, but i did get a bit teary over this earlier in the morning
Who would you love to interview?
i want to interview the first person to find out that certain types of corn explode into something different and awesome when you heat it up enough! what did that discovery feel like? after that, did you just start burning everything to see what would happen? who did you tell about what you'd discovered? how did they respond? then what happened?
Is kissing cheating? Is looking at a pretty girl for too long cheating? Is jacking off to porn cheating? What is cheating? Where is the line?
people set their own rules and those rules vary enormously, so i would say the definition is between you and whoever you've struck up a contract with
Should I quit my job?
sometimes if you're lucky, the job quits you!
I listened to the post where you talk about meeting Conan and I think it's really cool that you've rubbed elbows with celebrities and tried to impact their lives in a positive way. Care to share another celebrity therapy session?
my friend's nine year old daughter declined light up shoes during back to school shopping last week because, "the shooter can find me easier if my shoes light up"
Do you miss France?
it feels more like i'm playing bingo and france was G-24 and G-24 was on my board, so i stamped it and it was thrilling (because it got me closer to getting the bingo) ... **to be clear, G-24 was extremely important and nothing is possible without G-24** ... but i'm not spending my time reminiscing about the thrill of stamping G-24 as much as i am anxiously/excitedly anticipating the next ball to roll out of the bingo cage
What game show should I go on?
spoiler alert: you're already on one, but don't worry... everyone wins!
Does Jolene listen to Dolly or does she go on ahead and steal Dolly's man?
plot twist: jolene is actually a lesbian and was never interested in dolly's man in that way to begin with, so dolly doesn't have anything to worry about... well, maybe she does, but it sure as fuck isn't jolene's fault
Do I have a soulmate?
you decide
What color is the sky?
you decide
Can you have success AND longevity in a romantic relationship? You seem to think you have to pick.
i think it's wonderful if you can find both, but i'm not sure you can know ahead of time that either of those things will happen (despite your best intentions) and knowing when to end something that needs to end can be seen as a success, too... i didn't select my three besties knowing from the beginning that they'd still be around years later... i just knew they were wonderful people and i watered the friendship plant a little every day and then years later (or even decades later), i see they're still by my side... but not every plant i've ever watered is... and i'm not sure there's anything anyone can do about that (and in some cases, it's a very good thing), so the mystery of relationships is perhaps just one of the challenging things about life that we must learn to accept with gratitude, even when we don't always understand why things work out the way they work out... i hope that makes sense
I'm scared of everything.
that's okay
Can you love someone you don't know?
who do you know? are you sure?
If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you want to live?
any place can be the right place with the right person
Have you ever gone skiing or snowboarding?
no
Why don't you answer my questions?
i may have answered them earlier in the list
How much money do you make on this website?
HAHAHAHAHHAHA
Finding out your friend's dad was dying at the end of the trip was (as you said in your song before you left) a fucking horrible plot twist. That's nuts. What do you think it means?
trips have many chapters... the end of one is the beginning of another
After all the talking and gaining wisdom and whatnot from the elders on the boat, do you think you have any new ideas about relationships and how to have a long and successful one?
well, this may be an unpopular opinion, but i think longevity in a relationship is not necessarily a thing to be celebrated... my mom's parents (who i've only met once) have been married for like 60+ years and the husband still beats the wife... a relationship can last five days or fifty years and both be considered successful in my eyes... and i think we all ask the question 'what's the secret?' when what we mean is, 'is there any way i can avoid pain when i love?' and the answer to that is 'no'... there's going to be pain somewhere along the way or perhaps many times and it cannot be avoided... the question is whether you believe it's worth the risk
It sounds like you struck up quite the bond with the chef on your trip. Do you have plans to meet up again? And the old man drinking Guinness sounds sweet.
the only plans i have right now are to go to Washington DC this weekend and then to Los Angeles at the end of September for another game show (gotta keep up with Eileen!)... i do not have any current plans to meet up with anyone from the trip in the future... but to be fair, i never planned to meet any of them in the first place, so i suppose we shall all just have to wait and see where life takes us
What's at the end of the rainbow?
let's go find out together!
I listened to that one post of your first dance wedding song and when you said "I haven't found that yet but I have hope" I straight up started ugly crying in my office. You're a beautiful human being and you deserve every happiness.
you're sweet... thank you
What's next?
depends on if i go with what's behind door number 1, number 2, or number 3
Hi. Hey. Hi. Yo. Hello. I liked your use of the narrator on the instagram feed. Very classy... MORE NARRATOR NEXT TIME. that was my favorite plot line. k thx baiii
Narrator: As she looked towards the moon and laughed, she accidentally tipped her glass over and what was left of the wine spilled out onto the bench cushion next to her.
Grace: "Oh no! Oh no. I've ruined it. I've ruined it."
Chef: "Ruined what?"
Grace: "Oh... well, I was going to ask you to sit next to me... and I ruined it."
Narrator: The Chef sat down in the wine.
Your trip looked great. What was the highlight for you?
love, trust, courage, and growth
Are you going to close this site down for the fall and winter again like you did last year? Could I maybe ask you to leave it up even if you go into hibernation or exploration or meditation or whatever?
i'll think about it
Your trip looks so amazing!!! Are you going to move to France?
not right now
what's France like
visceral
Why was earth angel the 1st dance song of your wedding? That song is so old tho .........
it was the song that was playing when my delorean got here
Is it legal to record people all the time?
everything is illegal
Did I miss the boat?
boats are infinite, there are always more boats
What's the tent video about?
you tell me
What game are we playing?
you tell me
Is everything going to be okay?
yes
Are you in France now? How is it?
i leave on friday aug 2nd and plan to return sunday aug 11th... will update this feed as much as i can, but have no idea if/when i'll have internet access during the trip
The "family" video is disturbing, because it shows how, when the happy major chords of family obligation fade away, you can hear the silent suffering and discontent they drowned out. If we were all more comfortable with Marc's silence, we could hear the suffering. Grace does like to play with fire, and she should remember, like anyone who does, that it has burnt down what she has built up. But when you're nothing but tired, you can't start a fire without a spark. You can't start a fire worrying about your little world falling apart.
you lost me a bit at the end there, but i will say that though fire can certainly be destructive, it can also be a refining thing when it burns away the unnecessary and leaves behind the indestructible [edit: just realized those are Springsteen lyrics at the end, i’m a fucking idiot... but what i said stands]
Are you lonely?
are you?
What are you going to do in France?
bandage up my ear
I don't get the tent thing you posted.
that's okay
Wait, did you have a baby? CONGRATS!
my best friend did
I can't stop crying and listening to the Welcome To The World song. I have had it on repeat for hours. The puzzling thing is that I can't tell if I think the song is happy or sad for some reason. Is it happy or sad? Are you happy or sad? Is the baby okay?
she's a bit early (although not as early as we feared she'd be), and she's doing great... when my own son was born, i was holding him and crying and everyone asked what was wrong and i said, "he's going to go to college" and everyone laughed and said "not for a long time" and they didn't understand that what i was trying to communicate was that he was perfect and pure and i had realized while looking at his beautiful newness that i was not going to be able to protect him from the challenges of the world (nor should i... that's where the learning comes from) and i felt the full reality of that truth in that very moment... entering this world is simultaneously a beautiful thing and also a tragic thing, just like the world itself
Just want to say to the person who is shitting on your tiktok that I don't know what they're problem is because I like it. You seem to have some judgemental friends
it's okay, i'm not sure i really like it either... sometimes creative experimentation involves trying things you're not sure you'll like so you can see if you like it or not, but i'm glad it's had some meaning for you
You're incredibly seductive.
conductive
Maybe Jesus was wrong? Maybe he didn't even exist? Maybe people made up all those stories to control other people? Maybe it isn't anyone's job to save anyone else? Maybe gurus and philosophers and priests and shaman are all bullshit?
be that as it may
i want to fuck u in the eye
i'm not an expert, but there's probably better ways to do it
GOD IS DEAD GOD IS DEAD GOD IS DEAD GOD IS DEAD GOD IS DEAD GOD IS DEAD GOD IS DEAD
e-Dog is Dad?
Your tiktok isn't very uplifting. Not really your brand. Kinda freaks me out.
which direction is up?
i don't have a question, just want some wisdom if you have any to spare
row, row, row your boat (gently, down the stream)... merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily (life is but a dream)
What movie should I watch tonight?
UHF
Why are you answering questions?
why are you asking them?
By the way, there's a lot of research about narcissists and empaths and their toxic codependency. You should read it.
thanks for this (and the other fifteen messages along these lines that i've been sent in the past few hours)... i hear what is being said and i have edited my answer to a previous question... i have nothing more to say on the topic and continue to wish all people well on their own path towards freedom and peace
I'm thinking of a number between one and ten. What number am I think of?
*
why did you decide on tiktok as the new platform of creative choice and what do you hope comes of it
just seems like a solid exhaust pipe, plus it reminds me of vine (except the bots are way more encouraging)
I HOPE YOU DIE IN A FIRE YOU SELFISH MAN HATING WHORE
over 3,000 people die in a fire just in the united states every year, so you may very well get your wish
Give me a plan for the day.
take a long walk in the rain
yooooooooooo you coming to raid up on area fitty won or wut?
the real area 51 was in our hearts all along
What's in my sandwich?
ham and cheese
Follow up to my previous question: how do you think either of them or any other person should handle things going forward after the #metoo movement? It seems unfair to just say that we should throw people away completely. Or should we? I don't really know. I don't think anyone knows? But we need to figure this out, don't you think? You seem to be obsessed with empathy, so don't you have any empathy for them? What would you do in their shoes?
according to most folks (who slam me with upset private messages every time i address this subject), i have far too much empathy regarding this topic and my tendencies towards restorative justice make everything worse for everyone... and i am reminded that of all the philosophies throughout history, the words that seem to provoke the most confusion and outrage when actually put into practice are these: 'love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which spitefully use you and persecute you'... despite the heart-breaking knowledge that such a philosophy leads to one's own crucifixion, i will continue to walk that path
Do you see any difference between Louis CK and Aziz Ansari and if so what and if not why not?
they both got a wake up call, but i suspect that only one of them woke up
How do I become legendary?
die
I notice a big gap from summer of last year until spring of this year on the page. What was going on then and why didn't you post anything?
this page is to analyze and report on and experiment with data... but that also means that from time to time i'm gonna have to go out and gather some more data
Is Amazing Grace your favorite hymn and if not what is it? Why?
this one seems to follow me wherever i go
nice website
thank you
Why did you stop posting on the play page?
had to send my brain in for a routine oil change and while they were in there, they found a leak in my heart valve... should be out of the shop in a few days as long as all the parts come in on time
Are you okay?
are you?
damn girl, you can belt!!!
when i was married, i didn't allow any belts in our house or cars or anywhere near me, so my husband had to keep them at his office and finish getting dressed at work
Are you done collecting people? Are you now just collecting yourself?
i think that perhaps collecting people is how i collect myself... but finding a balance between consuming and assimilating and rejecting and changing is key and i'm still working on that (and probably always will be)
Just went through your whole website. It took me longer than I thought it would. Also I didn't even know Harry Anderson had died. Or maybe I thought he was already dead? Half the time someone is trending on Twitter, I don't know if we're celebrating their birthday or the anniversary of their death or if they just died. Anyway I had fun and now I have like ten more sites to dig through. Your site is like a portal to other portals. Thanks for making it!!!
sometimes i wonder... with the advent of recording technology, will anyone ever die?
Best thing about rabbit holes?
Easter eggs
What's the best thing about internet friends? What's the worst thing about internet friends?
distance
I found you from Jacob Collier's Make Me Cry video. Do you work for Pixar?
pixar works for me
That video on your Revolt page with the song about "family" should have a trigger warning on it. That's not okay and it is extremely disturbing. I hope your friend has a therapist. I'm serious. I'm not trying to be flippant. I don't think he's a safe person for you to be in contact with. I'm sure he's lovely at times, but he doesn't seem well. I don't think you're going to listen to me, but I'm going to tell you what I think anyway. You play with fire and it always turns out really badly and I'm not saying it's your fault, but I am saying (as always) that it's not your job to fix broken men and I wish you would realize that for longer than five minutes at a time. Grace. Listen to me. Please. I love you.
there's so much i could say here, but let's just start with the fact that one out of every nine women that you see every day in every room you enter has experienced childhood sexual abuse at the hands of a trusted adult (and 80% of sexual abuse perpetrators are parents)... there are far more traumatized people walking around in the world than you may realize and to suggest that anyone who even discusses such a thing in a piece of art is automatically 'broken' or 'unsafe' is a huge huge huge huge part of the problem of why people don't talk about this stuff and why it festers and the cycle continues... and i can think of few better therapeutic ways of coping than by making art/music/theater/etc with those feelings, despite how uncomfortable it may make others... that type of creative effort isn't for everyone, but is does let survivors know that they are not alone when handling these types of experiences... and honestly, i'm happy that you don't understand that... i hope someday to live in a world where no one will have to understand that... lastly, be very careful about reading too much into people's creative work... sometimes there is a big difference between what's in front of the curtain and what's behind it (for better and for worse)
What if I never find what I'm looking for? Lots of people don't.
hopefully you'll have had fun looking
What's one thing you think I need to work on to become a happier person?
i have no idea who's asking, but generally speaking, all of us can always work on gratitude
DIE IN A FIRE BITCH CUNT
hit 'friend', cabin cutie (#anagram)
How many partners do you have?
calculating
Please tell me that Matt Farley is going to make a podcast responding to your response to his podcast.
hahahaha, holy shit... we could really keep this going forever
so If you quit your job does that mean you're not working at all anymore? How will you pay for stuff? how do people just quit jobs?? I mean I would like to quit my job too but I have responsibilities.
i'm currently doing tour assistance for a friend and then when that's wrapped up, i'll be starting a new position doing grants/contracts work for the jazz dept at my local HBCU
What is this?
an intensive care unit
Who are you?
a gas station attendant
LOL! Nardwuar
doot doo
I swear to god i hear a telephone ringing or something in the end of the Most Threatening song. Is there a telephone ringing or am I insane???
i hear that too, but i honestly have no idea where it's coming from... there's also the faint sound of a bell almost like a trolley dinging noise at the end of another one that happened as a train was going by outside
Greetings! I am your long lost great great great great grandperson from another dimension and I need you to choose for me the infinite earth spirit whom I shall partner with for all of space and time. They must be the apex of all living persons of your universe. One who can carry me through the portholes of the unknown and slay the dragons of yesterday and tomorrow and save all the peoples of my planet. Who shall you choose for me? I will understand if this takes you many decades to contemplate, but I'd like the answer by Friday. Thanks!
that's the easiest question i've received so far!!! (and you better be the apex of all living things in the entire multiverse because no one other than that could ever be worthy of partnering with the infinitely beautiful blessing that is the nard)
I AM GOING TO DESTROY YOU
sounds like a fun challenge! godspeed
Best part of your past 8 hours?
i took a walk barefoot in the rain
Ask me a question.
why?
GODDAMMMIT i thought u were hot in a libraryan way and then but you have a kid ?? and it killed my boner BIGTIME sorry not gonna raise someone spawn but u still cute
oh no, i will mourn this great loss throughout all of eternity
Does your dad approve of this website?
my dad is dead... and if he were alive, he'd be 80 years old and would certainly have no idea how to use a computer
You get permission to sing over other people's tracks?
no, but (so far) everyone i've mixed with has heard and approved of the tracks before i posted and i always have (and always will) link/credit other people if they are involved in the post
Have you ever told someone you loved them and then changed your mind?
no
Got future plans?
future plans got me
The advertisement in the middle of the rainbow song post on the laugh page actually scared me! I wasn't expecting it at all. But then when it jumped back to the song I started laughing. And then I went out and bought some five hour energy!!! The commercial worked! Maybe I'm going to win a vacation! If so I'm taking you with me
i've never purchased or consumed that product (and probably never will) and it infuriated me when it popped up randomly in the middle of the performance, but i will say that it DID water the seed that i needed to quit my job, so i'm oddly grateful that it popped up
gg;gns:GSDGGSDg g jgs'sj h' j'j s's 's jk'S"zgl;ndhfdjs jDG J"f jfjj g Knlg slgkNSd/glkSdg lzs sgh 'Sgs 'kGSDkG LSdgjnx.jvZN/lskbz;dl igkS g hj gdsfj eo;8awhp eo83uihp ;oet ayli srkjz/lhkjzsriw4ylIE
could have used a few more numbers, but i'll take it
You just laughed. What caused it.
i can't remember, but maybe this? i think?
What if I make the wrong choice?
make a new choice! if that one's wrong... make a new choice! if that one's wrong... i think you see where i'm going with this
What's something you used to love that you don't have anymore?
my mom used to collect fiber optic music boxes... i loved those so much... wow... THANK YOU for this question, because i hadn't thought about those for decades and it just gave me the most amazing amazing amazing warm feelings
Who is that guy on the June 2nd video?
my son's uncle
Who are you taking to France with you?
everyone
FUCK YOU SELF RIGHTOUS BITCH
excellent suggestion... i fucked myself this morning and it was glorious... might do it again later, will keep you posted
What drum sampler were you using on The Most Threatening THing?
those were my roommate's chopsticks on our kitchen counter
The "One Day" song made me cry. I don't know why.
good tears, i hope!
Do you think your time at CRS was a waste?
absolutely not!!! i met some cool people, i was in a local TV commercial, and i learned a HUGE spiritual lesson... in order to truly repair something that's been through a disaster, you often have to do additional demolition first... more demolition seems counter-intuitive to repairing something, but you have to do it to ensure that you've dried out every nook and cranny inside of the walls and underneath the subfloors... if you try to build something new straight away, it will only cover up eventual rot and mold
Fuck. You quit. I knew that was gonna happen. You're already missed.
“often when you think you're at the end of something, you're at the beginning of something else" -- fred rogers
prison is a great way to put it - so proud of you for doing what makes you happy and for not doing what doesn't. and for recognizing people's bullshit. how do you do it without worrying about what happens next
a long time ago, i answered a question about the difference between belief and faith... you should check that out... also, i will say that bravery isn't a lack of crippling fear, it's the ability to do the right thing despite the crippling fear
What did you think of Sexy Fetus?
i was literally screaming in joy... i set that ball up and expected him to tap it over the net, but he fucking spiked the shit out of that ball and i was so proud of him... it will become more difficult to be free with the always-encroaching corporate overlord vultures surrounding, but even if for just that moment, i got to watch him frolic in freedom and it was an absolute privilege to watch
My boyfriend and I cannot get "Shame on You Grace" out of our heads. Total bop.
thank you
Did you give up on this page?
no, but i was getting a number of submissions that were clearly from my office, so i needed to hold off a minute until i took care of a few things there
Are you worried about being fired?
hell no
OH MY GOD I LOVED SEXY FETUS HAHAHAHAHAHAHH YOU FUCKING MAD LADS
the playing field is always more vast than you think, isn't it?
Hey. That thing you made with that pervert about sexy fetuses is disgusting. Shame on both of you. What is wrong with you people? Being shocking doesn't make you better or cooler. It's low brow and beneath what you're capable of. You both need Jesus.
with all due respect to your opinion, i thought it was one of the most beautiful 21st century parables of all time... the fetus is the infinitely magnetic creative spark/idea/energy and murderous Greg is the corporate/label/executive that wants to steal, alter, and destroy it... is that not what you got out of it?
Anonymous coworker here. The admin on call song is fucking hilarious. You're cool. And this place is going downhill fast. That giant TV with all the revenue numbers and shit on it is making everyone insane. We aren't "Compassionate people dedicating to help" or whatever. It's always about making the most money and I'm tired of trying to compete to take advantage of people in crissis.
thank you and you're right and i'm sorry... seeing the direction of things the past month or so has broken my heart
Follow up to my other last question. Do you believe in signs?
signs believe in me
Follow up to my last question. Do you park next to any new signs now?
yes
I feel like the story of that building explosion from your haiku page totally just got lost in the story pile. What happened there? Is it being rebuilt? And you parked under that sign every day before it blew up? That's insane. Can you give us any more story there?
it's still just a giant pile of rubble as far as i know... i'm sure eventually they'll rebuild something, but it will probably take a long time... i will say that the 'prescient' sign is still there on the only remaining wall
Holy shit GRACE! What if your bosses hear that jingle?
i'll find out that they have a sense of humor or i'll find out that what i'm saying isn't actually a joke and they'll freak out on me... should be educational either way!
Why do you like playing and making things with other people?
it's fun to play catch with people you love... and the results can be pretty amazing
can't find Trench playing Hey Jude on YouTube anywhere . link?
it's not on YouTube
I didn't know you played the flute! Sounds pretty! <3
besides this month, i hadn't played since 2013ish
Are you still in touch with Matt Farley or was that phone call a one off thing?
we're workout buddies
The post you made where you were screaming in all caps at your self was scary. Do you always talk 2 yourself like that?
no, i'm not sure i've ever written out anything like that towards myself or anyone else... i haven't looked at it since i wrote it, but i'm sure that i was harder on myself than necessary, but sometimes you gotta be disciplined and if there isn't someone around to discipline you, you'll have to do the job yourself
You are so impressive and I hope you don't let the nuances knock you down. Some of us hope you knock down the others.
i'd prefer that no one ever gets knocked down, but i've come to realize that someone getting knocked up, down, or sideways in reaction to my presence is based on what they're bringing to the table... i'm just holding up a mirror while exploring the world... we'll see what happens along the way
Sometimes you hide things in periods and stuff on your page. Like I can click on little dots and get taken to bonus stuff. I just wanted you to know I found some of those and that made me feel cool. Why do you do that?
i think you may have answered your own question
The converation between you and 20000 songs guy was really cool.
thank you
teach me a lesson. tell me who i really am. don't hold back.
the Connection is working, but sometimes there's a bit of a delay between what we hear and what we see... but it's okay... through a bit of testing with some trusted friends, everything will eventually sync up quite nicely, right on time
What do your prayers be like?
thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you please don't give up on me yet thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you
TEST
you passed!
How should I deal with feeling so restless?
rest less
Are all creative people just insane?
outsane
What is a muse?
a fuse
YOUR WEBSITE FUCKING SUCKS ON MY PHONE AND PROBABLY ANY PHONE. Seriously the videos sometimes don't play because the files are huge and everything is tiny on this page and it is infuriating to try to navigate. Please fix this. Most people visit websites on their phones, so having a website that is so unusable on a phone is probably defeating the purpose of you having a website at all. Why bother putting out a product if you're not going to put in the effort to make sure it isn't the best it could be?
not everything in your life is going to be worth the investment of your time and effort... only you can decide if the amount of work this website requires for you is worth your investment
How do you think you make people feel when they meet you? Do you actively try to make everyone you meet feel good?
i think my unflinching honesty and vulnerability sometimes unintentionally makes other people feel naked... how they feel about being naked probably depends on a lot of things outside of my control, but i always do my best to treat anyone's nakedness with the greatest possible reverence, honor, respect, compassion and love
I listened to that Conan story and thought it was really cool and not crazy so tell me another celebrity story like that!
last summer when i was feeling particularly lost, i was walking through downtown Durham and i saw a homeless man in a wheelchair holding a sign asking for help and i walked up to him, fell on my knees and asked him if he would hold me and pray for me... he did and we both just laid crumbled together on the sidewalk crying in each other's arms for a long time
What's the best thread count? I'm at the store buying sheets and I'm not sure which ones to get. Figured you could help. Thanks.
go with 1 infinitely long thread
When is the last time you laughed? When is the last time you cried? When is the last time you made love? When is the last time you felt ashamed? When is the last time you felt proud? When is the last time you went on an adventure?
looks like someone located my daily to-do list
Why don't you want to be famous?
i don't need the world to know who i am... i just need you to know
Do you believe in polyamory?
polyamory believes in me
answer the question i haven't asked
i will try
is ur pussy shaved
is yours?
Are you a man hater?
hell no... i love men so much that i created a brand new one!
I AM SO PISSED OFF AND DISAPPOINTED RIGHTNOW FUCK
talk/vent to a trusted friend... if you can't do that (or even if you can), write it out and maybe even post it somewhere online
Why didn't you become a teacher? I thought that was what you were going to do when you left Duke?
i got a job offer and talked it over with my son and he veto'd it... i always discuss any big decision that affects him and if he's not 100% on board, then neither am i
Do you still love the one who got away?
i am the one who got away
What kind of phone do you have?
iPhone SE
When's France?
August
How's the baseball game going?
rain delay
Do you ever get depression? If so, have you ever taken medication for it? I'm thinking about trying zoloft.
after i gave birth (2009) and after my divorce was final (2013), my brain chemicals were waaaay out of whack and i took prozac for a little while and i'm sure it saved my life both times... i don't have any experience with any other depression-related medication and i imagine that different meds affect different people different ways, so i can only speak to my own experience... your results may vary
Would you ever date a disabled person or would you be too embarrassed because I think if I dated a non disabled girl people would think it was weird and she would leave. There aren't many mixed ability couples in the world but I don't want to feel like I have to date another disabled person just because I am disabled. Do you have any advice about this?
i don't know if you live in a small town or whatnot, but more diverse places will have lots of unique pairings of folks. i dated an amputee a couple of years ago and people would invariably ask completely inappropriate questions ("are you his nurse?" "how do you have sex?") and i would tell them that the way he ended up in the wheelchair is that i fucked his legs off... if someone tries to embarrass you or your partner, both of you should just mirror that bullshit right back and then keep moving forward
Do you remember every question that's been asked so far?
no
Are you scared of spiders?
no
Did you really blow bubbles on people in a church service? Did anyone get upset and tell you to stop?
i blew bubbles and let the wind decide where they needed to go... afterwards, a number of people thanked me
Do you have a best frieND and how long thave you known theM?
i have three best friends and i met one in 1994, one in 2006, and one in 2012
How do I get to the VIP area of this club?
through the service entrance
what's a good way to avoid answering a question?
what do you think is a good way to avoid answering a question?
What's the difference between being a private investigator and being a stalker?
payment
I need to file a complaint against the better business bureau.
contact the better better business bureau
Why do you want to be "great adjacent" and not just great yourself?
why do physicians want to be sick-adjacent and not just sick themselves?
What's in this bag?
school supplies
Tell me a story about pickles.
nicholas megalis once sang an improvised jingle about a pickle in a bag at the convenience store and it's been in my head for over six years
What's the forecast?
warm and getting warmer
Do you believe in Jesus?
jesus believes in me
are u a nasty filthy dirty WHORE
no, but i play one on tv
How do you come up with the words you label things with on this site? And how did you decide on Mr. Rogers, Trench, Bill Wurtz, and Marc Rebillet as people to highlight specifically? Are they friends or are they just your favorite artists or is it something else?
the words are the action/command that i most associate with the content that it links to
What would you do if someone you knew like an enemy called your job for a disaster help?
that's already happened
Why don't you answer my questions?
i may have answered them earlier in the list
I think it would be cool if when you click on knock it make a knock knock noise
that would be cool... although, if i had the time, the first improvement i would make to this site is to not link out to anything ever and host everything in-house so that i don't have to worry about things being taken down off youtube or news article paywalls, etc.
Do you believe in heaven?
heaven believes in me
What is a goal you're currently working on?
physical health
Hey
hi
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCKFTUKCJGISUHJSDDNSLAEJGHSUGLKJDGFA
bless you
When do you decide to update this questions page?
this is not a questions page and i usually update when i have at least five submissions that i feel i'd like to post and/or respond to
Do you dare to be great?
great-adjacent
Why won't you answer any of my questions about [redacted]?
as a general rule, i don't talk about specific people... i think i did a bit early on and realize now that's probably a really really bad idea... but if you're the same person who's asked about one person in particular, i'll say that i think the difference between us is basically the difference between Conan O'Brien and Chris Gethard
Est-ce que tu vas apprendre le français?
peut-être un peu
Give me a good metaphor for recovery.
okay
i was just in my room and it was really cold and i was just laying there thining about how cold it was and then i realied that i was basically staring at a heater the whole time so then i turned it on and now I'm warming right uip
it really do be like that sometimes
Who are you laughing at?
myself, usually
You have a lot of walls.
and windows
How was your day?
better than yesterday, not as good as tomorrow
I got a new haircut. Do you like it?
yes
Happy Mothers Day! You are the most emotionally connected, most peaceful, most joyful, most confident mom I've ever known in my entire life and it shows in the independent, compassionate, thoughtful, creative man that Joe is becoming. Hope you guys have a wonderful day!
thank you
Why don't you share more of your music here or elsewhere online? You seem to share everything else so why not that?
probably for the same reason that i do not currently choose to make sweet, slow, passionate, unifying, transcendent, life-affirming, mind-blowing love to myself or anyone else in aisle nine of the local grocery store
Even though you don't post everything that's submitted here do you still keep a record of all of the submissions somewhere?
yes
Tell me the best song you've heard recently.
it's a new one whose chorus arrived in my head just this morning
What is the ultimate purpose of this website project?
what is the ultimate purpose of a cookbook?
HOW BIG IS YOUR DICK
same size as yours, i imagine
What are your wants and desires?
to afflict you when you're comfortable and to comfort you when you're afflicted
do you have a favorite bible verse
"love yourself, love others, be honest, stay curious, keep growing" -- Me 1:43
That metaphor ended pretty sadly. Is there not recovery from trauma? Surely you don't just wander in a dark underground maze forever?
the question didn't ask about recovery... and the fact that you used the word 'trauma' suggests that you may already know that some people don't get to the recovery part... they just wander around hitting the few people they run into with shovels out of (understandable) fear... that's the generational trauma cycle, is it not?
Do you write for or work freelance for Dictionary.com? Why do you use them here?
no... it's just used for randomized inspiration
What's the secret of the universe?
secrets
What's new?
now
What's the best part about your new job?
new friends
What was being raped like?
i don't use that word and i'm still not sure it completely fits in my particular case (although the definition of that word seems to change by the minute recently) and i don't think we have a lot of the right words for a lot of experiences in this life, especially sexual ones... and i don't know why you would ask this kind of question, but let me try to answer the question anyway... it's like standing in line with a whole bunch of people and you don't even know what you're standing in line for, but every woman you know is in line and a bunch of dudes too, so you stand there, and then when you finally get to the front of the line, a huge giant punches you as hard as they can right in the face... so you stumble away from the line and you don't know what to do, and blood is dripping down your eyes and pooling in your mouth and through the blood and the tears, you scream "HEY WATCH OUT SOMEONE IS GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE FACE AT THE END OF THIS LINE" and everyone is like "shit", but they also have been standing in line their whole life and don't really know what to do, so they're just kind of wandering around and the giant that's punching people in the face is somewhere out there wandering around in the group too and all of it is terrifying as fuck, and at this point there's so much blood in your eyes that you can't even really see, so you feel around and finally get your hands on a shovel and you just start digging a hole and you don't even know where it's going, but you're just going to keep digging because it feels safer the further down that you dig and then you tunnel far enough down that you somehow run into someone else tunneling and then both of you look at each other in terror and try to be the first to hit the other one with a shovel
I'd never heard of Rachel Held Evans until she passed away, but she seems really amazing. Just wanted to say that.
<3
Are you ready for France? I'm so excited for you!
it's still about 90 days away... although i'm almost at 90 days at my new job and those flew by, so...
So sorry about RHE. I keep checking your honor page.
yeah, i will write a proper post eventually... i think i just need some time on that one
Please help. My poop smells like my dog. What does it mean?
it's time to wash your dog
do you know who is asking this questions
you
Do you ever talk to yourself?
i have written letters to myself for many years
What's your favorite color?
rainbow
Where do we go when we die?
birth
Are you a child of divorce?
no
What was the last text you sent and who did you send it to?
'hell yeeeeeeah' and it was sent to a friend who said they were bringing potatoes to cinco de mayo potluck brunch
Why are you proud of me?
because you're trying
Let's go to the park and rent one of those boats you power with your feet like a bike.
that sounds nice
ngn;fn;sdfbf;bfbf;bf;bf;sbLbfa;sjbna;sobn;Sbn:Snb;sodbn:Sjbn;sjfnbdkjdvkjsaFJSHfjgso;lfknbkhsdblAKejsrhn;urhjalkweuhbdvalisurhnalwekauhd;oslrjngalskuahbejliwetnPQI3GIW4RAJEIL
seems legit
Who is going to win the next presidential election?
someone that disappoints at least half of the population
Is it unethical to pursue a relationship at work?
relationships at work are already baked in... you don't really need to pursue them
What do you want to be when you grow up?
free
Where have all the cowboys gone?
dallas
How many questions have you answered on this page?
i have no idea
Do you answer everything that's asked here?
no
Are you single?
are you?
Do you want to be famous?
on the whole of my life, i hope i've made more of a positive impact than a negative one
I'm starting college in the fall. What should I study?
bubbles
I think it's pretty cool that you're so connected into local politics. Do you seriously plan to run for office?
no
What's harder: being honest with yourself or being honest with someone else?
doing both at the same time, i guess
Are you into guys or girls?
i'm into you
Give me some good advice
okay
Did you get what you wanted for your birthday?
it arrived about six months late, but yes
Wow. You're very weird and it's very, very cute. I'm so glad you came along.
thank you
What is this?
whatever you want it to be
What do you think of the TU reorganization?
sometimes instead of pulling jenga pieces out one at a time, i like to drop kick the whole thing across the room, so i totally get it
??? are you done with this questions and answers page
this is not a questions and answers page... this is a training ground for asking, seeking, and knocking... sometimes it might mean asking a question and sometimes it might mean just making the effort to knock on the door and find out what happens next
Oh shit HAIKUS YES! Are you going to port over all your previously publshed ones??
no
Do you think you'll ever edit this Q&A section? Do you ever worry about regretting something you said or someone taking something you said a long time ago out of context?
i doubt it
WELCOME BACK! I mean, you never really left, but you set this project aside and I thought you might never pick it back up and I really liked it.
thanks
What's the difference between mercy and grace?
mercy is when you don't get something bad that you deserve and grace is when you get something good that you don't deserve
Two roads diverge in a wood. Which one is the one less traveled?
where we're going, we don't need roads <blasts off into the sky and that makes all the difference>
You seem like the kind of person who still has a VCR.
you are correct
Is faith and belief the same thing? Can I have belief in general without saying I have faith? Like if I'm spiritual but not religious?
belief says if it ever goes skydiving someday, the parachute will definitely open... faith jumped out of the plane while we were discussing the question and i'm not even sure it had a parachute on
I think I'm in love. What do I do now?
love
You've been reposting a lot of things here, but not creating much original content... at least not for the past year or so. What gives? I used to see a lot more art, music, poetry, etc from you.
if god can rest on day seven, so can i
How do I fall out of love with someone?
fall in love with someone else?
I'm about to start my senior year of college and I want my boyfriend to ask me to marry him before we graduate. How can I make that happen?
sounds like you should be the one to propose
What are you doing for your birthday?
working at a job i love, i hope
How much water have you consumed today?
not enough... thanks for the reminder!
Which US cities do you enjoy the most, and why?
honestly, other than the terrain/scenery being different, they all feel pretty much the same to me... that said, i enjoy going anywhere i haven't been before... i consider LA/NYC to be 'television towns' and nashville/memphis 'music towns', so those four spots hold a special place in my heart, because i love making television/music and being around those who do... i haven't been to my 'art towns' (portland/austin) yet, so those are probably next on the list for visits
I miss you updating this website every day. :(
i count updating any instagram feeds and the spotify journal as updating the website
Blink once if you won a car. Blink twice if you won money. Blink three times if you won Rice-a-Roni.
i went on the price is right. i had a great time. the episode will air 9/26/18.
What's the longest amount of time you've gone without sexual intercourse?
22 years
Are you in love?
i try to be in/on/under/over/around/through love as much/often as possible
How many ex-partners do you have? Is it more or less than 10?
yes
Do you play Fortnite?
no, but birdie does (when under direct supervision)... it's actually the first time i've allowed him to play any game involving guns and i made him sit through about twelve thousand lectures about the seriousness of real life weaponry / war ... but Fortnite is pretty cartoon-y and i told birdie we're going to pretend like it's a paintball game... and i also feel like it's important to walk him through cultural phenomenon rather than unilaterally ban him from everything i might personally find problematic in some way
What cereal would you most like to eat right now?
product 19, because it doesn't exist anymore and it was my favorite
I love that you decided to take a giant trip during Mercury Retrograde. Zero fucks given.
i barely know what that means, but i will say that my mom's phone got lost in the ocean and i kicked my laptop off my bed accidentally and one of the places i stayed at during the trip charged me twice, so i need to get that straightened out... but i've got too much adventuring to do to let planet positioning grind things to a halt
How many television shows have you written for or been on? Is it more or less than 10?
yes
I got stunk by a jelly fish :(
somewhere, there is a jellyfish telling their friends that they narrowly escaped death from a giant during a home invasion
Have you ever said I love you and then regretted saying it or wished you could go back and unsay it?
no
Is Wayne Brady as sexy in real life as he seems to be? I just missed being able to see him during his run on Hamilton in Chicago. *weeps*
i did not attend any tapings of lets make a deal... will be able to explain why in a few weeks
When is the last time that you cried and why did you cry?
i got a little teary yesterday while eating dinner because i missed birdie
DID YOU WIN EVERYTHING ON THE PRICE IS RIGHT TELL ME I NEED TO KNOW AHHHHHH
i went to the price is right. i had a great time. the episode will air 9/26/18.
When do you get back to Carolina?
sunday night or monday afternoon is the plan right now
How is California?
warm
Have you ever been overseas?
not yet
Do you wear jewelry? Why or why not?
no... i'm allergic to a lot of metals and i'm a bit of a cheap plain jane, i guess... when i was married, i just had a simple gold band... i think i got it at kohls with a gift card from christmas, if i remember correctly
Why do you have this website?
it's a complex multimedia diary/scrapbook, which is what my facebook was until it started being used as a tool to bombard me with advertising, fake news, and general upset
Do you know how to play chess?
no
What do you want to win on The Price is Right?
the opportunity to spread love and hope to millions of people who might need it the most
Is your passport up to date?
not yet
Is Phoenix and/or Birdie on the trip?
Phoenix, yes... Birdie, no (he's on the second of two summer vacations with dad)
Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?
on a secluded holiday with waldo, i hope
How's the trip? Can we follow along? PUUHHHLLLLLEEEEEEASSSE?!
i'll make up a new instagram account tonight and post the link on the home page before i leave in the morning
What is something you learned this week?
it's less of something i learned and more of something i was reminded of: i had a race with Birdie on a concrete path and accidentally tripped on my own feet and went tumbling down, skinning my palms/knees/elbows and HOLY HELL it still hurts really badly after like 48 hours despite tons of ointment and bandage changes... so, i am reminded that being a kid is really tough and when little ones cry because of skinned knees and whatnot, they really mean it! poor little sweethearts! my empathy for boo-boos is at an all-time high
Boys are terrible
some humans are pretty broken, for sure... and then again, some humans are awesome! it's a bag of mixed nuts for sure, but in the long arc of history, things are actually getting better all the time, i promise
Phoebe Fiat is going on a huge adventure! I bet she really zips around the mountains, yeah?
that's true... but actually, my friend Vinny's car broke down today, so i gave him mine to use while i'm gone and i rented a car for my adventure instead... looks like i'll be travelling the country in a mazda3 with massachusetts plates! guess i gotta work on my boston accent... i rented a caaaaah... how's that? ;)
I want a helper. How do I get a helper?
give up a rib
Why is birth so painful?
so you'll have an unshakable investment in the end product
I'm having a baby this fall. What advice can you give me?
sing prince's 'i would die 4 u', but change the lyrics to 'i will diaper you' whenever it is time for a change
What's the difference between a chrysalis and a cocoon?
chrysalis is a defunct british record label and cocoon is the sixth highest-grossing film of 1985
What is the best album to put on while I sex my girl
uh... well... logic's 'everybody' album fucked me real good recently, so... i guess maybe just give her that and leave the room for an hour or so and see how that goes
Have you ever been to California before or will this be your first time?
first time
why am i so hateful and scared of what i dream of?
you tell me
How's the road trip going so far?
i'm not leaving for cali until wed... although i am making a quick trip to artscape baltimore sunday to finally get to see tony's film (and hopefully bo's too!) so if you're in the DMV area, feel free to meet up
What's something that you love more today than you did a year ago?
rain
Sometimes I think I don't have enough fight in me to succeed in this world. I don't want to trample anyone to get ahead. I want everyone to win.
same... hey, let's compete about who is more non-competitive! (although, fair warning... you should take the draw)
What movie should I watch today?
the one that inspires you to make your own movie
I was supposed to go to a karaoke party tonight, but instead I got diarrhea and stayed home. I hope your day was more productive than mine.
it sounds like your day was very productive, just not the way you anticipated... drink some water and take a walk... there will be more parties
What's the last thing that made you really frustrated and how did you deal with it?
i was watching a clip of Colbert and an ad started in the middle of it and when i clicked onto a new tab to work on something else while the commercial was running, the ad stopped... it would only play if i kept the tab open and looked at the screen... felt like a hostage situation, so i closed my browser entirely and made some kind of light growling noise and worked on something else instead
everyone is old as fuck at this nude beach
you must be in new jersey
Yellow or Blue?
green
Why didn't you finish your graduate degree?
i decided to help someone else do theirs first
When you say you love people, i Think you mean more like you care about them.. Shouldnt the word "love" be reserved only for certain really special people ? Otherwise it loses impact i think.
love's impact is infinite, therefore it cannot be lost or lessened no matter how widely it is distributed
I LOVE YOU, GRACIE!!!! I CAN'T WAIT TO HUG YOUR FAAAAACE AGAAAAAAAIN SOOOON!!!!!
i love you, too
What are you afraid of?
it's usually a tie between nothing and everything
You have a lot of yourself online. Aren't you afraid of stalkers?
no
Thoughts on ghosting? Have you ever ghosted someone or been ghosted by someone? It seems like it's happening more than ever with Tinder and whatnot.
super super super cowardly, but i understand why people do it... i've never done it and i've never had it done to me, but i'm also an insane person who says everything i'm thinking the moment i think it and seems to be allergic to running away from difficult conversations... also, i'm sure this isn't a new thing, it just used to be called 'standing someone up' or 'being stood up' and it probably happened even more back in the day, because it was surely easier to disappear before social media / mobile technology
There's a guy that has a thing for me, but I'm not into him. I don't want to hurt his feelings, but I don't want to be an asshole either and just like shut him down before he's even said anything. Any advice? Should I just block him and run? We only have like two mutual friends and I could probably avoid him if I really try.
casually mention being gay or being taken, even if those things aren't true? that's probably terrible advice, but it's usually pretty effective... whatever you do, don't take your time on this and hope it just goes away on its own, because the longer you go without putting your foot down, the worse it's going to get for the both of you, i promise
Are you happy?
happiness is a road, not a destination
What's your favorite thing about your life?
that i can lose my marbles and disappear for a few months every few years and when i come back around, my friends are always just as supportive and excited to see me as ever
Will you ever tell us about you and Trench? That was always my favorite part of Vine. #imissvinesomuch
i doubt it, because a story involving someone else can only be told with the permission of the other person and trench is (obviously) a very private person and i would never betray someone's trust like that... although, i've told other great vine-related stories before, so perhaps you can just live off one of those instead (if you don't have facebook, then make a dummy login, i guess? i thought about trying to move over a decade of work to this site and then realized that's a lost cause when i've got so much more shit to do... i'z sowwy)
Does no always mean no?
no, but you should act as if it does anyway to be on the safe side and let the other person figure out how/when to be honest and say yes if that's what they really want to say, because if you're wrong and they really do mean 'no' and you force a yes, you could cause immeasurable harm to the both of you
What's the last text you got and who was it from?
'i'm outside guasaca' from a friend meeting me for lunch
When is it a good idea to give up on a crush going somewhere?
i've never had a crush who i didn't express my feelings to... sometimes those feelings are reciprocated and sometimes they are not... so i think that step one needs to be expressing your feelings to the person and step two has to be respecting the person's feelings in response... if someone does not reciprocate your feelings, try not to think of it as you need to 'give up' and perhaps think of it instead as you need to 'respect the person you love'... and also, it might be useful to keep in mind that there are many different types of love and many ways to love someone
Is it foolish to dream? Doesn't that just set you up for disappointment?
to the contrary, i think it's more fun to always attempt the impossible, because then when you fail, it's expected and not as disappointing... and if you succeed, well then you accomplished the impossible, didn't you? and how great is that??
How many toilets do you have in your house?
three
I'm going through a really bad breakup. I want to pretend like it was mutual, but it wasn't. I feel like my entire sense of reality is irreparably fucked now and I'm collapsing in on myself like a dying star. Is this going to get any better? I know you're going to say it will, because that's what everyone says, but do you have any real concrete ideas on how to get through this? Please don't say, "It takes time."
romantic love is the ultimate tunnel vision, which is beautiful when you're in the tunnel with your partner and horrifying when you find yourself in the tunnel alone... so your top priority right now has to be the struggle to make your way out of the tunnel... go on some journeys to new places to help get yourself out of your current daily rhythm and if one journey isn't enough, go on another one that's twice as long... keep doing it until you're out of the tunnel... you'll get there a little more every day, i promise
Why does God let bad things happen to good people?
why do you?
When is the last time you did a sexy slow dance?
new year's eve, i think
What's something you got in huge trouble for as a kid? How long were you grounded for?
it's... complicated
What is your favorite thing to do on a rainy day?
take a walk
Have you ever done karaoke? What did you perform?
proud mary and super bass come to mind, but i know there are many others
Would you ever skydive?
oh, i think i jumped out of a plane a long time ago
Is @yourfriendgrace you on twitter and if so why dont you use it??
it's not me and i don't know who it is, although i wish i did so i could get that handle! it used to be mine a long time ago, but i deactivated for too long at some point in 2014 (i think?) and lost it
What is your greatest regret?
when i look back, i usually am bummed that i didn't stick up for myself more in certain situations... i'm working on it :)
Should I sign a contract?
that depends on your goals and the conditions of the contract
Do psychologists ever go crazy themselves or do they know so much that they can stop themselves before they lose it?
in my experience, most people who study psychiatry are drawn to it in the first place because they feel the need to diagnose themselves or one of their loved ones
OH CRAP! Are you going on The Price Is Right? Ugh, you are my favorite person ever. Ever ever.
yes, and!
What is your latest obsession?
cramming for finals! :)
I'm so excited about your upcoming trip! What made you decide to finally go for it?
i realized that the only thing stopping me from making my dreams come true is me... as soon as i started planning the trip, everything began falling into place as if the universe was making a huge exhale saying, "FINALLY! we've been waiting for you to be ready for so long"
Uhhhhh, you don't mean like actually kill yourself for love, right?
NO! no no no no no... i mean 'kill' in the same way that we get 'new selves' every seven years or like 'ye must be born again', etc... a suicide of the ego... eek, now i feel like i should edit those, because i probably got way too philosophical on those questions... thanks for asking for a clarifying follow-up! i know i can get a little weird/heady now and again
Do you believe in the whole five love languages thing? Like different people have different ways of communicating and so you should figure out how to love them best based on how they like to be loved? How can you figure that out though? Is it just trial and error?
all learning (especially social learning) is trial and error... but i will say that one method of love that seems to work across the board is figure out what another person's dreams/goals are and then figure out every way you can to support those and/or make those things happen
How do I love?
find something you'd die for and then kill yourself for it
How do I hate?
find something you'd die for and then kill it for yourself
Ummmm hi I kinda stalked ur FB & saw pics of u with ppl from the office! Omfg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOW? I watch that all the dime with my mom do u work pn there or sumthin?
no.
What is bravery? Am I brave? Are you brave?
i was going to say no, but i changed my mind
my paresnts are awful they dont understand me and they hate eah other and they hate me and i just want to get the fuck out of here what shoudl i do
determine your own way to survive and conquer and if you hit a wall, figure out if there's any way to climb over, under, around, or through it... once you've exhausted every possible path, if you still can't get past it, plant some flowers at the wall and know that help is on the way
Will you give me your phone number?
check on the inside of my glasses
Why are you doing this?
our kids need a mom
Did you save up for retirement?
i didn't, but it somehow saved up for me anyway
If you could give me a gift right now, what would you give me?
internal peace/balance
What do you think about music theory? Does knowing more theory make your musical experience better or worse? Should I study it if I want to really appreciate music?
think of music the same way you think about sex... imagine picking it apart in the same way and envision if that would help or not... how much? in what ways? could you enjoy sex without the theory classes? could you learn about it just by doing? what would help more: trial/error/experience or reading about it? but could reading about it still help in some ways?
Is it better to be an optimist a pessimist or a realist?
be the realest surrealist
Are you a jealous person? Have you ever dated a jealous person? Isn't jealousy an inherant human emotion? How to deal with it in yourself and other?
while jealousy is an innate human trait, it is also the enemy of love and, left unchecked, it would certainly cause the inevitable demise of any kind of partnership with me... the goal of loving someone should be to help them be more free... to help their light shine brighter, not snuff it out and/or hoard it
What did you always want to be when you grow up?
a kid
I just moved to a new city and I want to make new friends, but I don't know where I should go. I don't want to go to church, because I'm not sure those are the kinds of friends I want to make, but that's always been my go-to for making new friends in a new town. Any advice on where to go?
an orphanage
What's something that can always make you feel better?
rainbows, forgiveness, expressing my feelings in constructive ways that don't hurt myself or anyone else, solving a complicated puzzle, helping someone else feel better... the answer to this question could be quite lengthy
Any chance there will be a NM stop on the next trip?
guaranteed
How can you say "I love you too" when you don't know who said I love you??
i don't have to know someone to love them... actually, it's usually most effective to do it the other way around
What is the hardest thing in the world and are you going to do it?
mr rogers said the toughest assignment in this life is to 'make goodness attractive' and i'm trying... first to myself and then, if i'm successful in that endeavor, perhaps to you
Should we pay attention to the news?
let the news pay attention to you
What turns you on?
elon musk making a tiny submarine to help rescue the trapped kids in thailand
What's the last thing that made you cry?
elon musk making a tiny submarine to help rescue the trapped kids in thailand
How do I defeat a wolf in sheep's clothing?
be a sheep in wolf's clothing
I love you.
i love you, too
Why are you the way that you are?
because i can?
Wait a minute, you don't believe in soulmates?!?!? That's not very romantic! If you don't believe in things, they can't come true.
i'm not sure i understand what romance is... i kinda only understand what love is in a general way, because it's the most powerful kind for me... today i spent some time with a homeless guy and we just hugged and cried and he prayed for me and it was probably the most romantic thing i could have experienced today, but i also don't really know what that word means, i think... but in that moment, grizzled kind homeless dude was my soulmate and it was great
Is love real or just chemicals?
everything is chemicals
Where's the next adventure? (*cough* austin *cough*)
i'm going on the most ambitious trip of my life from july 25 to aug 6... details will be showcased soon ;)
Have you ever embarass yourself in front like a crush or something and felt you were going to die? Because me.
HAHAHHAHA... every damn day, dear... every damn day... but that just means you're alive and you're trying and that's nothing to be embarrassed about, i promise
You don't know me, but I found you on Reddit and you seem super nice. I don't know why I'm telling you this.
because you feel happy and you want to spread happiness... keep it up!
Why do you delete stuff?
i'm a control freak?
How old are u?
probably old enough to be your mom but not your grandma
AHHHH THAT WAFFLE SANDWICH!! Want!! Is there one of those shops in Nashville???
it's only in DC, sadly... but now i kinda wanna open a waffle sandwich food truck for the triangle! you can open one in nashville, too! where's that person who kept asking me if i figured out my 9 to 5 yet?? maybe they'll invest! ;)
You jumped on a landmine for us, Grace. We won't forget it.
#143
I think your ratio of thinking to doing is slightly out of whack. Little less conversation (in your head) a little more action (outside of it)?
thank you for your input, i have forwarded your suggestion to corporate
Hit me up a platitude but fix it first.
all who wander are lost, but at least they're trying
Just wanted to say I love you and I'm thinking of you today and I'm grateful for everything you've done this year for the women here and around the country (and world)! You are and always will be one of my all time favorite sheros. I know you've pulled back from a lot of things over the past few months, but you deserve the rest. You are one of the strongest people I've ever known and one of the most graceful and fair. Your name really does fit. Thank you, thank you, thank you. You have saved more lives than you will ever know. You are so loved. I hope you really feel that love and support on this independence day and every one to come.
thanks for the kind words... onward, forward, together
What's a good first date idea?
new employee orientation
When is the right time to walk away from a bad relationship or job or church or whatever? How do you ever know when to walk away and when to keep trying?
you don't... you just make a choice and see how it feels and if it feels bad, make a new choice... that said, i tend to keep trying waaaaay past the expiration date, but i'm working on finding the right balance (and so can you)
Still haven't hit the ceiling on that Spotify list, huh?
amazingly, no... and perhaps more amazingly, i'm able to remember all the songs i've used thus far and am still able to think of my days in terms of songs i haven't used yet
Who is the sexiest celebrity?
it's a tie between you and bob newhart
Are you a witch?
probably... on a related note, what is a witch?
Can I plz purchase a sweet smoothe jam that shall be my song of the summer. k thx
hmm... okay, but no refunds
OMGGG THE SEASHARK VIDEO IS TOO ADORABLE AND I AM NOW DEAD RIP ME AHHHH!!!!
i'll tell birdie to put a trigger warning on the next one ;)
Did you go see Mr. Rogers grave?? What was that like?
i did... i didn't feel much, because (for whatever reason), i just don't feel anything when i go to gravesites... but i still felt like it was an important pilgrimage to make and i'm glad i did it... we also went to the fred rogers center in latrobe and saw his sweaters and shoes and the trolley and puppets and even some of his handwritten letters and notes and scripts and whatnot which was really neat
What advice would you give someone feeling suicidal?
first off, recognize that this world is batshit crazy, not you... then go eat your favorite meal, drink some water, and get some sleep... and if you still feel seriously like killing yourself when you wake up, make a list of hilarious/insane (but non-violent) things to do before you go, because you might as well, right? maybe in the midst of running naked through a walmart screaming "i'm a sexy salamander" you might end up having a good enough time to decide to stick around (after you get released from a hospital, i imagine) and if not, then at least you got to fuck with reality one last time... **NOTE: if you're local and you feel this way, just come over and let me squeeze the crazy out of you**
How can I gain more wisdom?
make more mistakes
I'm in summer school and i hve to do a report on a famous historical figure so who should i picK?
sophie scholl
Have you seen the new Mister Rogers doc? I saw a poster for it and thought of you.
yep! twice! and i'll probably go a few more times, too! :)
Any chance you'll be in NYC for DCM this weekend (or are already here!)?
nope, but i'm sending everyone lots of good energy to break all the legs! (and i'm secretly hoping with the change of location next year will come a change of name, because fuck del close)
I feel like I haven't seen you in 700 years. Are you traveling for the whole summer?
no... i should be back in carolina in the next 24 hours and will stay put for at least 2 or 3 weeks... i definitely need to decompress/process after all the recent adventuring
Will the answer to this question be no?
yes and no
Tell me five physical (inanimate) objects that provided you happiness in the past 48 hours.
the most transcendent grilled ham and swiss sandwich on a waffle, whatever cooking machine helped heat/toast said sandwich, the car that transported me to said sandwich, the mall whose food court allowed me to experience said sandwich, this website by which i can alert you to said sandwich
Do you wish you had finished your graduate degree?
no
Do you believe you have a soulmate? Not like in the sense that we are all each other's soulmates, but like the hollywood kind. You know what I mean I think.
no, but i'm open to being proven wrong
What is something that matters a lot to you now that didn't matter to you five years ago?
'enthusiastic consent'... and i wouldn't say it didn't matter to me five years ago, but i think about its importance much more now than i did five years ago... it's easy to steamroll somebody on accident when you're overcome with your own emotions and you've got to be willing to walk yourself back from the ledge if your partner isn't just as willing as you are to jump
Dearest Grace, Tulsa has the Woody Guthrie archives, the Bob Dylan archives, and we're in talks for the Johnny Cash archives. We're also about to have medical marijuana. MOVE HOME.
i'm proud of all the forward steps that oklahoma has taken and continues to take
Are you really proud of me?
really really
Tell me a story about your the best part of your day.
today or just in general? (if we're talking about today, it involved freestyling to this and this with birdie and my bestie in the capitol)
What song are you listening to right now?
theme song to Family Ties
What are you most excited about this week?
lord willin' and the creek don't rise, i'm going to get to pay respects to my spiritual father
First stop on the journey this time?
just singin' some songs with my friends
IMPROV!
no, but yes, and
Are you getting tired of answering questions yet?
no, but are you tired of asking them?
Have you ever experienced multiple personality disorder?
no, but it sounds like a good time and it's on my bucket list
Do you ever give up on people?
no, but sometimes people give up on themselves and there's nothing i can do about that
How do you seem to know what I'm thinking? Are you psychic?
no, but maybe we're just both tuned into the same radio station
Is it better to be single and lonely or married and miserable?
what about single and miserable or married and lonely? (if i were you, i'd choose something outside that four block, but that's just me...)
Are there any characteristic that all your romantic partners past/present share?
bashful confidence and inexhaustible passion about some particular topic, though the topics vary pretty widely (politics, basketball, comedy, physics, music, film-making, blues/swing dancing...)
Are you going to make another picture feed for the upcoming trip? I really liked following along on your last one. :)
probably not... but i'll be sure and share anything special that happens somewhere on this site, i promise
Did you visit your dad's grave while you were in Tulsa? Why or why not?
no... it didn't even occur to me, actually
How can I stop feeling so fucking sad and hopeless and useless all the time?
drink water, take a walk, and help someone else... i know you probably don't even have the energy to get out of bed, but even walking through a grocery store and genuinely complimenting a stranger will help you remember that your existence matters and can brighten someone else's day... and when you say their day brighten, yours will brighten too
Your mom is adorable. That's not a question- I just wanted to put that out there.
she's a sweetheart
U gonna cum 2 hahvahd and fukup sum smaht kidz?!
you know i'm always doing that in spirit
How many waffles have you eaten in the past 24 hours?
no comment
Big spoon or little spoon?
why not fork?
I ALREADY MISS YOU GAAAAAHHHHH COME BAAAAAAACK
i'm already there
What's a constructive way to deal with anger?
music, art, writing, exercise, introspection, problem-solving, delaying actions you might regret until you can calm down... the goal should be to find your own unique way of internal/external deescalation that doesn't hurt yourself or anyone else... and if/when you make a mistake dealing with your anger, apologize and make it right
What do you think is the quality about yourself that helps you the most and what do you think is the quality that hurts you the most?
impulsive honesty
What happened? Did you give up on this website?
of course not! but, remember, this site is a scrapbook and playground to document my adventures... it is not The Adventure (therefore, it is not The Priority)
Where's the next trip?
birdie and i will head out at the end of this week to take a 10 day excursion up/down the northeast corridor... still piecing it together after decompressing from the first summer journey
Why didn't Birdie go on the trip?
he was on vacation with dad
Tell me a story about your mom that isn't online somewhere else already.
over the past year or so, she became friends online with a musician/audio book narrator who lives in tulsa and he was giving a seminar at the library this weekend, so they finally got to meet in 'real life' and he asked her to eat afterward and he said that he's kind of a recluse and never leaves his place much and she said she would help him by editing his stuff and shopping for him and bringing him things so he could 'keep his nose to the grindstone' at his place, and he said that would be great, but he also wants to get out more, so he suggested they meet for food again in the next day or two... to say i am thrilled for her (and for him) would be the understatement of a lifetime #nevertoolatetofly
All I want to do is fill this box up with stupid stuff. What does this mean about me as a person?
that you're having fun
Who's on first?
who
How many 9-volt batteries does it take to change a tire?
the tire cannot be changed unless it wants to change
love?
Love.
what's the biggest difference between you now and you ten years ago?
i am ten times more free than i was ten years ago... and i hope to be ten times more free ten years from now than i am today
I LOVE YOU, GRACIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND I'M PROUD OF YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i love you and i'm proud of you, too <infinite exclamation points>
Where is the line between being merciful/loving and being an enabler?
i have no idea... if you find out, please let me know
What colour is your soul?
rainbow
How can you stay in a car for so long?
it's fun for me... i think i'd probably make a pretty good long haul trucker... maybe i'll do that one day
Dose bacon make good underwear
not for me, but you're free to try it and see if it's right for you
Was Madonna a slut?
i don't know her and i don't know what that word means
Soooo are you coming to Austin then?!?!!?
i won't be coming to austin on this week's trip, but this isn't the only trip i'm taking this summer
What's that smell?
bacon
If you're listening to music right now (and you always are) then what song is playing while you are answering this questions?
'i'll take you there' by the staple singers
How did you get so much time off work?
i retired early
Why do you have like ten different instagram accounts? If you just hashtag each trip you take, you can still print them by trip and whatnot and then you can just use one account.
i don't have ten accounts... i just don't like a ton of people following my trips unless they really want to, so i make things a little difficult i guess, i'm weird, i don't know, we know this
Safe travels ya crazy kids!
thank you
What the fuck was up with that dude who wrote a hate comment on a childrens book? Doesn't that shit bother you? It bothers me. I hate the internet.
all you can do is be the person you want to be and then love yourself... not everyone will understand or like you, but if you understand and like you, you'll be okay no matter what... even on the internet :)
How many questions have you answered? How long are you going to keep answering quetsions?
i'm not sure, but i imagine there's probably at least a couple hundred at this point... i'll continue as long as i'm inspired to do it
Why didn't Jesus get married?
he was already married to everyone when he got here
Have you left Durham yet? I left my shoes at your house and can't find my phone to call you, lollll
i'll leave them outside my front door in the morning :)
Who, or what, is God?
you, me, we, us, everything... i usually refer to 'god' as capital L 'Love' or sometimes 'the Program' or 'the Story' or 'the Author' or 'the Sum' or all sorts of things... i especially like to refer to 'god' with the 'wrong' pronouns (she, they, it) and i have a shirt that says 'love your godde, love your neighbor, love yourself' that i wear that really trips people out, because even just spelling 'god' differently challenges/expands people's views on The Indescribable Unity
Are you bringing Phoenix and Birdie to Tulsa?
phoenix yes... birdie no
Thoughts on Anthony Bourdain?
"turns out not where, but who you're with that really matters" -- dave matthews
What is the point of this website? Don't get me wrong, I love it and I visit it every day because I'm curious about whatever you're posting and whatnot, but is there something else you're trying to do here?
i think you may have answered your own question
How to be resilient?
count your blessings
Hey there... hi... hello... you wanna maybe come to New Mexicoooooo?
i'm not planning to go any further west than oklahoma... i'z sowwy :(
Where are my keys?
on top of your head, silly
Stop peddling smut to the nation's children, Grace... UGH!
NEVER! ;)
What is your most recently watched item on Netflix?
comedians in cars getting coffee
Oh snap! Your trip is coming up soon then? Do you have the cities picked?
yep... this one won't be quite as unscripted as the journey i made five years ago, because i'm mapping out where i'm crashing each night ahead of time this go-round, but i am definitely stopping among the best people, so it will surely still have plenty of beautiful, unscripted elements
Tell me two truths and a lie about yourself.
i was an aunt before i was born, i lost a good portion of the right hemisphere of my brain at age 8 after being struck by a stray bullet, i do not have a passport
What was your first job?
i used to mow lawns to help my parents make rent and it's often 100 degrees in oklahoma in the summer and i'd mow over sticks and all sorts of crap that tore my legs all up and i swore when i grew up i would never mow a lawn ever again... i haven't lived in a place with a lawn since i left home at 17
IVAN EVERLASTING LOVE FOR YOU, GRACIE!
awww, good work
When is the road trip and are you gonna document it on Instagram or Snapchat or Facebook or?
this month and i'll probably make a new instagram account for it
Ivan!
ivan who?
Thoughts on Kate Spade?
approximately 3000 people commit suicide worldwide every single day... if you ever think you're in danger of becoming one of those people, i hope you'll reach out to me or someone you trust who will counter any shit arguments that your broken brain might be making in the moment
What makes a great comedian? What makes a great musician? What makes a great artist?
unflinching honesty
Which mysteries would you most like to be solved?
dsb wl kvlkov hzb, 'hgrxph zmw hglmvh nzb yivzp nb ylmvh yfg dliwh droo mvevi sfig nv'? rm nb vckvirvmxv, xzivovhh zmw ftob dliwh krvixv gsv hlfo rm dzbh gszg ziv uzi nliv wruurxfog gl svzo gszm z yilpvm ylmv
Tell me a secret.
love wins
What to do if you're falling in love?
start here, but recognize that they may end up building something that kills you... if you're still okay with that, then go for it and enjoy the ride
Is there anything you've done in your life that you're absolutely positive you never want to do or experience ever again no matter what?
eat peanuts
What's the most ridiculous thing you've ever done that actually turned out really well?
i think most things in my life fall into this category, but i'll go with giving birth
Do you still have any items that you grew up with?
yes
What was the name of your first pet?
I'm Not Giving You My Banking Question Info, But Nice Try (i was a very unusual pet namer)
How many people asked you to the prom?
zero (i called the assistant band director at home one night and asked him to be my date... and he said yes)
Were you popular in school?
i was nominated for 'best sense of humor', 'most studious', and 'most likely to succeed' in high school, but didn't win any of them... i was nominated for homecoming queen in college, but didn't win that either... #mostlikelytoalmostsucceed
Tell me something very few people know about Mister Rogers Neighborhood.
mr mcfeely always ran in and out of the room blurting 'speedy delivery' because he was high on meth the entire time
KNOCK KNOCK
who's there?
What's a good way to spend an afternoon?
defy gravity, survive, start fires, make, believe... in the words of birdie, "anyone can have a perfect day... just do things you like with people you love"
Did you go to Beaver Queen today? I didn't see you. :(
aw man... i'm sorry... i'm kinda checked out atm with visitors in town and whatnot... i'm sure it was amazing and i can't wait to see pictures!
Give me the best advice you can and then give me the worst advice you can.
fall upward?
Any chance you'll come to Austin on your summer road trip?
sounds nice
What's the most insane thing you've ever seen anyone do?
be born
Do you have all the answers?
oh heeeeeeeell no
If you were a ghost and could possess people, what would you make them do?
forgive... themselves first and then everybody else
Pretend you are a cat with nine lives. Which life would you be on at this point?
maybe six going into seven?
Why are we here?
to learn and to love
I think what happened on your phone is your Exchange got shut off and your phone had stored a ton of stuff automatically on Exchange instead of on your phone. (Like your contacts and whatnot.) I'm really sorry, Grace. That sucks.
it's a first world problem... i'll be okay :)
Is your mom on the way to you? Tell her Emily says hello!
she arrived around 2am, actually! she made a couple wrong turns and ended up in tennessee at one point, but made it safe and sound to her destination eventually
What's your number?
143
My job really fucking sucks. Every morning I wake up and am in a state of panic just thinking about having to get up and go to work. :( Would it be irresponsible to quit if I don't have something else lined up yet? I really don't know what to do.
i know that feeling for sure and it feels so confusing and frightening... ultimately, i don't think it's ever irresponsible to remove yourself from the orbit of people/places/things that feel unsafe for you
What's the biggest lesson you've learned so far in 2018?
be reeeeally careful with the anonymity of the internet... more and more, i can see the dangers of anonymous internet use for everyone involved
What's your next musical or artistic adventure here in Durm?
i recently scored some handbells and will be getting together with some folks in the coming days to get c(rung)k with 'em... will keep you posted on performance schedule!
Who is your favorite Biblical prophet?
jim carrey
When is the last time you felt super angry and why and how did you handle it?
i wouldn't say i felt angry necessarily, more surprised and disappointed... but apparently Duke has/had access to my iPhone (as i had given that authorization years ago, even though it's my personal phone) and yesterday they deleted six years of my emails, all of my contacts, most of my calendar items, and all notes that were stored on the phone along with a number of apps that i guess were part of the duke system, but left on something called the 'Duke Health App Store' which i cannot remove... so that's been... a learning experience... and i have handled it by remembering that privacy is a bit of an illusion and moving forward often involves not looking back... and that i need to make an appointment to go to the apple store to see if they can exorcise my phone
AHHH! Your mom is moving back to Tulsa?! HOLY CRAP! That's a big deal! When? She must be doing really well!
i know, right? i'm so excited for her! she called me tonight and is planning to arrive (hopefully) at my place in the next day or two and then at some point i may roll with her to georgia and then to oklahoma... i don't really know, we're both kinda playing things by ear and taking things one day at a time, but whatever happens, i'm super excited for her summer and her future (and mine, too)... new chapters all around
What do you usually think about when you first wake up?
what will Love accomplish today?
What are you hearing right now as you're reading this questions?
this episode of the neighborhood and a kiddo and puppy lightly snoring
Is there anyone in the world who you'd refuse to have coffee with and if so, who and why?
no... although i don't drink coffee, so i would probably just have milk or water
What do you want to be when you grow up?
a child
Tell me a story about your first kiss.
i was in college and the Phillips, Craig, and Dean song "Pour My Love On You" was playing, which i thought was super romantic (i still do, actually), even though that song is supposed to be about jesus, i guess?
Road trip soon? Like maybe to *cough* NASHVILLE *cough*?
my mom is moving from syracuse to tulsa soon, so i might tag along for some of that trip and make a pit stop in nashvegas... i'll keep you posted
CELTICS IN 2019!!!
haha... brad 5ever :)
Where is your next adventure?
where is Your next adventure?
Who was your first crush and how old were you?
doug llewelyn, the court reporter on The People's Court, and i was probably 3 or 4... i didn't know what it was, i just knew he made me feel really happy and really shy
If you were a Microsoft Office program, which one would you be?
outlook
What will the name of your debut album be?
i put out an album when i was 18 and it was called "Grace"
What's the nicest thing someone could say to you right now?
hi
How was your day?
really, really nice... and i hope yours was, too!
Would you like to be famous? In what way?
no
CELTICS IN 7!!!
hahaha... fingers and toes and eyes crossed
Describe your dog in one word.
phoenix
When and where and how did you meet Ben Folds?
the first time we met was april 8, 2004... he played springfest at the university of tulsa and then went to a diner with folks after the show
If you knew the world was going to end in the next 30 minutes, what would you do?
i would go outside and lay in a peaceful field looking up gratefully at the sky while listening to the rainbow connection on a loop until the end
YOU DISCOVER A BEAUTIFUL ISLAND UPON WHICH YOU MAY BUILD YOUR OWN SOCIETY. YOU MAKE THE RULES. WHAT ARE THE FIRST AND SECOND RULES YOU PUT INTO PLACE?
n̶o̶ ̶y̶e̶l̶l̶i̶n̶g̶ 1) listen 2) put the needs of others before your own
Who is the most recent on your missed calls list?
duke radiology
Tell me a joke.
there have been over 100 mass shootings in the U.S. before the midpoint of 2018
I guess my wording was clumsy - I meant which websites do you like to visit the most
ah, classic active/passive voice mix up (in soviet russia, website visits you!)... the internet is a giant multimedia library for me to learn everything i ever wanted to learn, so most of my internet time is spent researching whatever i'm interested in at the moment (and i'll use wikipedia, youtube, google, etc and let it take me down whatever rabbit hole)... today i spent a decent amount of time learning about harmony and nick drake's guitar tone... i also have linked some folks on my home page whose pages/works i visit daily for inspiration and peace
Would you ever consider going into the seminary?
if that was the name of a gay bar (and it should be), then yes
Have you ever broken a bone and if so, which bone was it and how did it happen?
no
Tell me a Princeton story.
one day, my mom called me and told me that her obese boyfriend had fallen through the floor of her mobile home while sitting on the toilet and as she was panicking about this (and water was coming up through the floor), a grad student friend came to my door crying... i quickly gave my mom the information on where to find the key to turn the water off and then told her i would call her back... i sat the grad student on my couch and gave her a soda and asked her what was wrong and she told me through tears that she had given her parents very specific instructions about the type of boat she wanted for her birthday and the one they got for her was not at all what she said she had wanted
CELTICS IN 6!!!
i actually think celtics in 7, but mainly because i want to see as much of this whole brain vs. (le)brawn thing as i can (and it would be more fun for brad to clinch it in boston)
Are we going to get more storytime with Grace? My daughter's obsessed with your first one!
actually, the question about 'most visited' pages reminds me that there are a few more stories i want to read... i'll try to get on that soon :)
Which websites/webpages are your most visited, and why?
i could figure out the answer to this question (because the editing platform i use has built-in tracking/analytics), but i don't care... this site is simply a safe and somewhat organized creative playground and digital scrapbook for me... maybe it will be something else one day, but i'm not focused on that right now... and i also want to say that i believe the quantification of worth via the rolling count of followers, friends, views, likes, subscribers, etc is one of the greatest plagues of the internet
Do you think you would you be embarassed if you died and before you had the chance to delete your internet history and or google search?
hell no, somebody print that shit out and publish it and make a million dollars and give it to birdie
What is your ideal girlfriend/boyfriend? In general, what are your preferences?
my ideal partner is a teammate, a co-pilot, and a best friend
What would be the most spectacular funeral you could imagine?
i actually envisioned my funeral waaaay more than my wedding as a child (adorable?!) and i wanted one of every type of person there from the homeless to the kings and i wanted them all to say, 'grace knew me and understood me and heard me and loved me'
Where is the last place you went out to eat and who did you go with?
i went to noodles and company last night with birdie
Is Durham past the point of no return?
maybe, but i'll keep fighting as long as i can anyway
What is a controversial opinion that you hold that many people around you do not agree with?
love your enemies
I am finally leaving the terrible supervisor and the news is nearly public. How did you celebrate leaving terrible people?
my heart soars for you! freedom feels so amazing! and finding the courage to distance yourself from people/places/things that you know are harmful is its own reward, but maybe also shoot me an email/text and we'll celebrate with some brunch/lunch/dinner/whatever soon :)
Have any songs ever made you cry? If so, which ones come to mind?
i remember crying as a toddler during nat king cole's 'a blossom fell' and also about a minute into this version of amazing grace when the bagpipe-bass drops... as i got older, i cried over 'story-based' songs like lightnin' hopkins' 'mr charlie', dixie chicks' 'travelin' soldier, brad paisley's 'he didn't have to be', etc. and as an adult i've cried over songs like nick drake's 'northern sky' and labi siffre's 'watch me'... but i know there are a trillion others
Why do you send your son to a public school instead of a private school?
“We live in a world in which we need to share responsibility. It's easy to say, 'It's not my child, not my community, not my world, not my problem.' Then there are those who see the need and respond. I consider those people my heroes.” -- Fred Rogers
Given the choice of anyone in the world, who would you want as a dinner guest?
you
Do you go to church anywhere?
i go to church everywhere
Tell me a story about the future.
love wins
What's your dream job?
all of them at least once
I miss your haikus and songs. GIVE US SOME HAIKUS AND SONGS WOMAN!!
this website is only in its beginning stages... there will be a time and place for everything
In 40 years what will people be nostalgic for?
public schools
In your experience, what is the most hurtful thing friends or colleagues can say to someone newly separated or divorced?
you need to pray more
Do you have any premonition about when you're going to die or how?
i'm honestly surprised i'm still here and am mainly just focused on doing the best i can with each day i'm given
How have you changed over the past 12 months? (Arbitrary marker, I know)
my first thought was that i'm not sure that i have, and then my second thought was that i drink more water and eat healthier food, and then my third thought was to ask my three closest friends what they thought: megan pointed me towards my own thoughts (see here and here), jeff dropped wisdom on me like it was hot (see here, here, here, and here), and sarah made a date for us to get dinner this weekend and cracked jokes (see here and here)... so what i learned most from introspecting a bit on this question is that i am the luckiest person on the planet to have three of the greatest humans on the planet in my orbit for 23 years, 12 years, and 6 years respectively --------- [edit to add this and this sent from sarah after i originally answered this question]
After I sent that, I realized I had another related question, so I guess you'll get to be proud of my twice, lol. How long should you wait to date after separation or divorce?
i can't say what's right for me is always right for anyone else, but it seems wise to take a good amount of time getting to know yourself again... and by 'good amount of time', i mean at least a year past the divorce being final... but i also know that i'm a turtle about this kind of thing
Is it okay to date when you're separated? In NC you have to be separated for a year before the divorce will be granted and that's a long time to wait.
i dated a little bit during my separation and wish i hadn't... i think that it's hard to not want to jump right into someone (anyone) else's arms to ease the pain, but that's incredibly unfair to the person you're dating who is (if you're being honest with yourself) a rebound/filler/distraction
My mom died like two years ago and I'm still sad about it. Does it ever get better?
some of the best advice anyone's given me is, 'take your broken heart and make it art'... try turning your feelings into music, painting, poetry, anything... and i think you'll see things improve
How are you holding up?
feelin' stronger every day
Can men and women be just friends or does sex always get in the way?
love and sex are not one and the same... i love lots of people and don't have sex with them and have mentioned this already many questions down... one of my three closest friends is a man who i've known for over a decade and we've never had (and will never have) sex together, sooo... (although we are married in the eyes of Costco... every unmarried person should find someone to fake a marriage with to split the cost of Costco membership... that's just smart shopping, y'all... plus, you'll be able to get gas for like $2/gal)
Would you ever flirt with/pursue a taken guy?
sources differ pretty wildly on what 'flirt' or 'taken' mean exactly, but i know what 'pursue' means and i know what committed closed relationships are, so i think i understand the gist of the question and my answer is absolutely fucking not... during the last relationship i was in a few years back, the guy dropped a bomb about four months in that he was 'still technically married' and it was 'no big deal', he just 'needed to do some paperwork', which told me that he either a) had no clue how devastating divorce actually is or b) had no clue how important his marriage should have been... trying to detangle from one another at that point was pretty painful (although, his ex-wife and i are now friends and i think she's absolutely brilliant and beautiful, so, silver lining!)... oh, and i dated a visiting professor last spring who burst into tears on our second date at which point they confessed that they were married and i found myself awkwardly consoling/counseling them about it for over an hour before awkwardly dropping them back at the faculty dorms... honestly, i'm left wondering if/how i'm supposed to ask for proof that someone isn't married on the first date? i didn't realize that was necessary, but maybe it is?
Tell me a story from your childhood that you've never told online before.
there was a cici's pizza in the strip mall behind the apartments where i grew up and if you went in the alley when they were closing, the assistant manager would sneak you the pizzas that were left over from the buffet before they were thrown in the dumpsters, which the manager usually kept padlocked to 'keep the vagrants out'
What have you always wanted to do but never done and why haven't you done it?
my earliest memory is looking through crib bars to watch The Price is Right and all through college, i kept trying to get people to do a spring break TPIR trip, but we always ended up doing habitat service work or something lame-o like that instead ;)
What's your dream house?
the one with all the people i love in it
What's your dream car?
the one i have now... (and i plan to drive it until the wheels fall off and then maybe even after that if i can figure out how to get the wheels back on)
Oh noooozz! I'm sorry you're sick. Can I send you some chicken noodle soup via Amazon Now?
is that a thing? also, yes please
Thoughts on the TRAVESTY of Brad Stevens getting ZERO votes for Coach of the Year? WTF?!
he has never been one of the cool kids nor has he ever cared or wanted to be... and in the words of michael scott, "i do my best work when people don't believe in me"
What would be the best thing(s) that could happen to you right now?
t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶s̶ ̶d̶o̶n̶'̶t̶ ̶u̶s̶u̶a̶l̶l̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶p̶p̶e̶n̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶m̶e̶,̶ ̶i̶ ̶u̶s̶u̶a̶l̶l̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶p̶p̶e̶n̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶o̶t̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶s̶.̶.̶.̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶i̶n̶ ̶t̶e̶r̶m̶s̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶l̶a̶b̶e̶l̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶s̶ ̶b̶e̶s̶t̶/̶w̶o̶r̶s̶t̶,̶ ̶o̶f̶t̶e̶n̶ ̶t̶i̶m̶e̶s̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶'̶w̶o̶r̶s̶t̶'̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶s̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶h̶a̶p̶p̶e̶n̶e̶d̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶m̶e̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶t̶u̶r̶n̶e̶d̶ ̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶b̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶b̶e̶s̶t̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶s̶.̶.̶.̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ ̶j̶u̶s̶t̶ ̶n̶e̶v̶e̶r̶ ̶k̶n̶o̶w̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶l̶i̶f̶e̶ ̶i̶s̶ ̶a̶ ̶p̶a̶r̶a̶d̶o̶x̶ ̶l̶i̶k̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶s̶o̶m̶e̶t̶i̶m̶e̶s̶.̶.̶.̶ i'd like to go on a long walk
Hey lady bones, I'm serious about the teaching thing. You should really consider it. Are you going to the rally tomorrow?
i was supposed to be in DC wed/thurs this week, but i appear to have come down with some kinda bug, so i'm stuck indoors fighting that off, but my heart is with the marchers for sure and maybe in the classroom with them in the fall, we'll see
Why aren't you answering your phone?
i just talked to someone on the phone for almost an hour... and it seems like you still found a way to reach me, soooo... are you sure you're dialing the right number?
REMINDER: 8:30pm Tuesday night ESPN
i'm on it!
What happened to not calling people names?
i don't think i've called anyone any names, but i also haven't censored and will not censor anyone's submission to this page... that said, i'm not perfect (or even close to it) so if you see something specific that you find questionable, let me know... my intent is always to challenge shitty behaviors (in myself, too) and not people's inherent worth if ever i can help it
Anything new and exciting going on this week?
i sure hope so!
Uhhhhhhh I'm a lesbian, so I don't think I need that condom LOLOL!!! More room in my packets I guess!
i didn't suggest a condom for the reason you may think i did
I notice you finally dropped that demon from your home page. Thank you. Forgiveness cannot come before repentance and he still thinks he's the victim.
i didn't realize the ongoing nature of the situation and was honestly just thinking about where i was in my own personal healing process and i'm sorry for causing anyone else pain or fucking up anyone else's journey... i'm still figuring this life out as i go along and i'm grateful for friends who gently (or not so gently) nudge me when i drift too far... thank you for continuing to be patient with me
How?
any way you choose
Why?
because
Where?
there
When?
whensday
What?
that
Who?
you
Okay, so here's the issue of the day: I hate doing the dishes, but my partner also hates doing the dishes, so now nobody does the dishes. How do we fix this, Oracle Grace?
only eat fruit and then throw the fruit waste outside your door in the street and when people are like, "wtf, why are you just throwing your garbage in the street?" just say you're composting and then they'll be like, "oooo!" and you'll be voted president of your HOA... i guess, i wouldn't know, i don't really know what an HOA is
I like your face.
thank you
Do you still leave cups of milk in random places that you find days later by their smell?
no... comment
What five things should every person carry in their pockets?
phone, ID, form of payment, key, condom
How do you feel about trains?
i love trains and i haven't ridden one in a long time, so maybe i'll have to do that in the near future
What's the mediumest thing you've ever done on a train?
i kind of miss little rides on the Dinky, which was a one car train that went between the Princeton Junction station and the Princeton campus... i'm not even sure it still exists
What's the worst thing you've ever done on a train?
drank mikes hard lemonade out of a paper bag into a blackout on NJ transit? i can't remember, but that feels accurate
What's the best thing you've ever done on a train?
i once sang the entirety of Hall & Oates' "Rock 'n Soul Part 1" aloud on the express train between NYC and DC
How do I tell someone I have a huge enormous mega super giant crush on them?
any way you choose
Are you the only person adding songs to that playlist? Caaause it's about seven billion songs long. What is the limit of songs in a spotify playlist?
yes/no/sort of/i don't know/i'm looking forward to finding out
What was the last thing you said out loud?
"I love you, Megsies."
What are your Mother's Day plans?
love, love, love, play, play, play, repeat
Is it possible to love someone you don't know?
this is an excellent question and i have three thoughts on it...
1) you could stop that question right after 'possible' and the answer would be 'yes' no matter what comes after because all things are possible... not all things are practical or good, but all things are possible
4) love is not a feeling, love is a verb and a choice... a unilateral action, not a reciprocal action (although it's certainly fun when the action is reciprocated)... so, for example, when a person donates to a cause, but doesn't see the end result of that donation in action, they are still able to love someone they don't know
3) proximity in space or duration of time does not always indicate any level of 'knowing'... some people live together, are married, even have children together, yet never know one another... a person must know themselves first and then allow themselves to be known by someone else and there are many ways to do (or not do) that
Holy shit, do you seriously not work at Duke anymore?
that is correct
Did you actually listen to the song "Get Paid"? It's horrendous. Like legit horrendous. And misogynist and just gross. One of the lines is like, "fucked her so good she started cooking" or something like that. Why are you defending having that song played in JVG? I'd have probably said something too. Actually, I would have probably been too scared, but I would have wanted to say something, because that song is so awful. Like so bad. You gotta know that, Grace. Sometimes censorship is good. There could have been kids in that coffee shop.
i think it was completely in the realm of reasonability for a person to politely request a song like that to not be played, especially if they were there with their kids or what have you (or they could just... ya know... leave)... and the barista not only complied with Moneta's request by turning the music off (a shuffled playlist from Spotify that the barista did not create or even have the presence of mind during a busy shift to even notice), she also offered Moneta his favorite vegan muffin and tea for free... but that wasn't good enough and Moneta got everyone in the shop fired... the media made it about a song, but it was really about a powerful entity wielding unchecked power on the vulnerable... this article sums up my feelings perfectly... (p.s. censorship is garbage and i'm never going to believe it's good... not ever)
Are you the person who painted the bridge? (It's brilliant on so many levels.)
i may or may not know who did
Which is more preferable being nice or being fair?
i'm a 51% grace, 49% justice kind of gal who dreams of being a 100% grace, 0% justice kind of gal and very very rarely tilts to being a 51% justice, 49% grace kind of gal when a person or group of people use their power to hurt the vulnerable without remorse... but even then, i hope the final outcome is restorative for all involved and not punitive
What's your favorite color?
rainbow
Thoughts on the upcoming teacher walkout?
i walked out years ago
Are you wearing pants right now?
not sure what's up with this strange recurring question, but yes
What's one concrete thing I can do right now to help humanity? No murky general answer world peace pageant answer here, I really want you to give me something specific. (please)
you could donate to the fund that's bailing out mommas from my local jail who can't afford pre-trial bail... four released today and more tomorrow, just in time for mother's day! (or if you're local, join us at the durham jail tomorrow)... or start up something similar where you live, because cash bail is unbelievably unjust and makes money off of people's suffering and does nothing to rehabilitate or reform (if the person even actually committed a crime in the first place, which they very often did not)
I CANNOT BELIEVE WE VOTED THE SHERIFF OUT! I'm literally crying right now. Durham is amazing! Could we see the end of the war on the poor in our lifetime? At least in one town?
we're not quite out of the woods yet, because Andrews is still in power until the end of the year (and Duke still employs 35,000+ people in our town and is problematic as fuck), but at least the clock is ticking down on one pretty significant area of concern... the work continues (and always will)
How was your day?
pretty fantastic and getting better all the time! i'm currently jonesing for a great election result and some significant shifting of priorities at my local Institution Of Unnecessarily Expensive Learning™ and then perhaps i'll have really bowled 300 on the day
OMG! LMAOOOO @ ripping your pants on the fence. I can TOTALLY picture it! Only you, Grace. Only. You.
#worldsokayesthero
I know you don't really care about voting or anything, but I think you should really think about getting out there and paying attention to what's happening in your community and maybe try to help vulnerable people or something. ;)
har har... i keep refreshing this page like a crazy person... the worst part is that even if the election goes the way it should, it will still be months before that man is out of power and until then, we've gotta continue to hang together lest we all hang separately... got your back, Durham... we won't go silently into the night... not today, Satan
Figure out the 9-5 thing yet?
getting closer every day, but have to tie up a few loose ends first
De donde eres?
everywhere
Do you have any specific anxiety triggers?
the same as anyone else, i imagine... i'm more flight than fight, though, and anytime i catch a whiff of the potential for violence/explosive or sudden anger/etc, i'm going to freeze and/or flee for sure
How to friend bad?
something that i find really unsettling is labeling a person rather than a behavior... for instance, saying someone is a shitty person rather than saying something they did/said was shitty or made you feel shitty... when you label a person instead of a behavior, you lay down a permanent judgement that leaves no room for redemption and i find that to be perhaps the most vulgar thing of all
That mind reading invention is INSANE. I'm legit freaked out. What's next?
i'm pretty excited about being able to communicate in real time with people on the ground while flying through the air... which is a technology that has probably been around for awhile, but it's new to me and makes me feel like a superhero for some reason... i guess progress happens whether we're ready or not (and that's great news!)
Can we use this box as an advice column and you tell us how to handle random issues? Or just a place to vent all the bullshit? Way cheaper than therapy!
sure... although i will never tell you how to handle things... i can listen and share my own experiences (maybe), but only you'll know what's right for you
Are you hating on Rachel Bloom? She's my favorite and she reminds me a ton of you. Is it one of those things where you're too much alike and so you hate her?
absolutely not! she's a genius and i adore her... i haven't had time to watch the show, but i have seen a ton of clips and they are musical, comedic gold
Wanna party?
sure?
Do you have any other favorite vines?
sure
Hey! I saw you and [redacted] and [redacted] at [redacted] doing [redacted]! It was so [redacted]! Can you explain yourself, madam?!
[redacted]
Where does a general keep his armies? In his sleevies. WHAT
son, you're fuckin' high
Did you block me on Twitter. :(
no! i just completed everything i needed to and closed up shop... i think it's useful when you go shopping for jackets to try on lots of them, including ones you think won't look right on you, because sometimes you'll find that something fits you better than you thought... but sometimes you'll find that you were right and it's not the jacket for you... twitter is not the jacket for me right now
WHAT THE FUCK! GRACE! YOU HAVE TO WATCH THIS CELTICS SERIES! I don't care what else is distracting you. Turn it off and get back in the game.
i saw he was trending #1 on twitter the other day and my heart flew straight out of my chest... i'm tuned in, i promise (and so is he, obviously)
Well well well! I see you're not posting this weekend and I bet I know whyyyy!
actually, i have shared something online every day, but maybe not in the places you frequent
Do you feel wanted?
do you want me?
Tell me a story.
last week, i saw someone on the side of the highway and their car was smoking and there was also a homeless person holding a sign a few feet away on the other side of the road... i drove by the scene and then pulled over to see if i could help, but i accidentally pulled over into an area where i had to scale a chain link fence to get back to the people in need of help and while i was scaling it, i dropped the bottle of water i was carrying and caught my jeans on the fence and fell forward on my face ripping my jeans nearly off... as i hung upside down off the fence, the driver and the homeless guy both ran over to help me and as they were running towards me, someone rear ended the smoking car, pushing it into the pole right where the homeless guy had been standing... this is not a metaphor for anything (well, i mean, it probably is and i'll think about that later)... this literally happened on 15/501 near i-40 and the persian rug store
How to friend good?
support each other's individual flights and then pick each other up if/when one has crash landed by singing the lyrics into their earpiece until it's time for takeoff again
What movie were you conceived to?
E.T. the Extra Terrestrial
Do you post everything that is submitted to you? Why or why not?
i don't post things that people ask me not to post or that i've already answered... i also don't post anything that would jeopardize the privacy of someone without their permission
Do you think we should just nuke the internet and start over?
ABSOLUTELY NOT!
Prove that #romance is not dead. #notblessed
if that were the case, then explain songs like this
YOU'RE BACK ON FACEBOOK! YAAAAASSS! I knew you'd come back!
not quite... just running a test of the emergency broadcast system
What do we want?
to be wanted
What do you want to achieve by the end of this year?
i really don't live my life that way, for perhaps two reasons: one, i find it unsettling and perhaps presumptuous to assume i'll be alive tomorrow much less a year from now or five years or ten years, etc... and two, i believe the Universe has bigger plans for me than i could dream and i'll be selling myself short if i make a plan and don't allow the plan to get blown up for a better plan to manifest... so, tl;dr it would be great if i am alive on Jan 1, 2019 and could say that i experienced 243 more days of 2018 during which i listened well and moved in the directions i was guided to go
DEM CELTICS DOE! Is that what the kidz say these days? Ya boyy is KILLING!
i hope you're sitting down for this, but... i haven't watched a basketball game all year (including March Madness)... gaaaah don't tell Brad! i've been hyper-focused elsewhere, BUT i hear he's killing it and i'm obviously not surprised... he's an angel through and through
What YouTube channel should I check out?
i'm really impressed with Sean Evans' "Hot Ones" where he interviews a wide range of folks while they eat progressively spicier wings to the point where the interviewee is often barely able to speak... Sean is a fantastic researcher/interviewer, perhaps the best out there right now
How do you deal with social anxiety?
ask questions? then the other person has to talk!
What advice would you give a new parent?
listen to the wisdom of your child and take it seriously, teach your child to be a good friend by modeling what being a good friend looks like, and pave the runway
Do you have plans to find a partner or are you happy on your own?
mann tracht, un gott lacht
Did you figure out the 9-5 thing?
you hiring?
Best art installation in the Triangle right now?
everything is great and everything should be seen and i don't want to hand out prize ribbons, nor do i feel qualified to do so... that said, if i could spend every day at You Are Here, i would
Who farted?
i believe it was the lord who said, "let he who first smelt it be he who is accused of dealting it"
What's your favorite Bible verse?
"Then came Peter saying, 'Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Until seven times?' Jesus saith unto him, 'I say not unto thee until seven times but until seventy times seven.' Then Peter said, 'Fair enough, but on the 491st time, can I choke that bitch?" -- Matthew 18:21-22b, Grace Living Translation
What's the most recent full album you listened to that you thought was really great?
Vance Joy and Kacey Musgraves both came out with absolutely outstanding albums this year... but what's giving me all the feels at the moment is a compilation of The Price is Right music cues from the past 40+ years
Have you got any distressing news items?
during The Office wrap party in Scranton, I mentioned that I was on a hunt for some rare beers from that part of the country to give as a gift to a friend of mine back in Carolina... Creed immediately asked for my keys and then drove off in my car only to return about an hour later with a trunk full of extremely expensive/rare beers... the exact ones that had been on the list my friend had given me and that Creed never saw
AHHH!!! YAAASSS!!! THANK YOU! The Birdie page is gonna be my favorite!
mine too
Can I has Birdie story pleeeeeze?
your persistence has paid off... i'll add more (from past and present) in the coming days
Who do you think you are?
a 911 operator for the deaf
Have you got any fun celebrity stories?
FLINT STILL DOESN'T HAVE CLEAN WATER
Have you only watched the first episode of Handmaid's? (cause the second one is... woahhhh)
watched #2 late last night and feel like i made the sex scene happen through the force of my own will
How do I get this clog out of my bathtub?
call 911
Any good concerts coming up in your area in the next few days? ;)
i hear there's a couple of terrible ones going down ;)
What was the last text you sent and who did you send it to?
'be over in a sec' sent to my neighbor a few houses down
What were the last words to come out of your mouth before you answered this question?
not completely sure, but i think it was, "oooooh, greg kinnear, you beautiful motherfucker!"
What was the last thing you read called and what was it about?
'the terrorist inside my husband's brain', an article written by robin williams' widow
What was the biggest inspiration for your new Twitter and its all-caps style?
my main inspiration was every social media account ever, but i was probably also somewhat influenced by the brilliant conner o'malley who used his vine to make guttural, animalistic wails at people on boats, playing tennis, on the red carpet at the tribeca film festival, at a fancy restaurant table, as well as businessmen getting their shoes shined and driving various luxury vehicles in new york city... and more
I love you.
i love you, too
What are your thoughts on the Brokaw news?
there's no way that a nearly 80 year old man ever tried to cheat on his wife ever, there's no way that a man and a woman could send confusing signals to one another or interpret each other's signals wrong, there's no way that a woman could feel intimidated or even traumatized when propositioned by an extremely powerful man, there's no way that NBC could try to cover up or otherwise silence anyone speaking out about discomfort by anyone at any time, and i am 100% positive that Rachel Maddow is lying and she was definitely sexually harassed as a young lesbian by Tom Brokaw and is only saying she wasn't for attention
Did you intentionally fuck up your Facebook algorithm at the end there with that string of "easter is coming" posts? If so, why?
yes... because it helps to throw a weird scent in the opposite direction as you pivot
Sooo... Handmaid's Tale Season Two, amirite?!?1?1
YES... couldn't have come at a better time... and i actually stood up and applauded in my room at the end of the first episode of the new season... and i'm glad they are releasing them one at a time, because i don't think my soul could take more than one episode per week
I LOVE YOUR NEW TWITTER FEED IT MAKES ME LAUGH AND I LOVE YOU VERY MUCH
thank you... er... YOU'RE WELCOME ;)
OMFG your twitter gives me anxiety!
i am excited that in five tweets or less, i accurately portrayed how all social media feels to me
Why is the playlist called "love layers"? What does "love layers" mean?
maybe we can figure it out together
What are you trying to communicate with the playlist?
i suspect each song communicates something different, but you'll have to listen to them yourself and see... and if they don't communicate anything to you, then perhaps you're supposed to listen to some other songs instead and that's totally okay
I wasn't the person who asked about what confuses you, but I really liked your answers and wonder if there's more? I don't know... sometimes I think I'm confused about everything and it's nice to know that other people are confused about things too, maybe even people who seem like they aren't confused at all about anything. Like you seem to not be someone that's got it all figured out, so to know that some things confuse you makes me feel less alone. I'm rambling. I ramble.
oh, the only way i would ever not be confused about anything is by first being confused about it and then trying to stumble around the room to figure it out... being confused is the default... and if i'm not feeling as confused as usual, i usually go searching for more things to be confused by
Too bad that car that hit you didn't finished the damn job! Knock on that you know it all bitch!
i hate to overstep my position, but it seems like it may be ill advised to send harassing messages to someone from your work computer
What's your next big project?
creating and inventing in a new language
Do you ever just straight up say what the fuck you mean? I'm with Jack Nicholson. People who speak in metaphors can go shampoo my crotch.
i'm less interested in saying exactly what i mean and more interested in having meaning in exactly what i say... jack nicholson didn't say that, melvin udall (sort of?) said that... and that's actually one of my favorite movies, but for perhaps different reasons than why you might like it
What are your thoughts on the Cosby news?
semen and fecal matter was found in one of the women's ear canals
Why did Jesus speak in parables?
why do parents put their babies in carseats?
What are your summer plans?
be at peace
What’s the last thing that made you cry? What’s the last thing that made you laugh?
after the Carmen Sandiego question, I googled “Carmen Sandiego and Waldo” to see if anyone had ever thought of that before and found this pinterest board, parts of which made me laugh and (inexplicably?) also cry
Tell me the most meaningful sign you’ve seen/heard/felt lately.
call before you dig
Why are people both the worst and the best?
i think that maybe we are all made to be 51% selfless and 49% selfish and sometimes we get the proportions wrong
What’s the most impactful lesson you’ve learned this week?
the only thing that was ever stopping me from leaving a soul killing work environment was me
I KNEW IT! Who is he? Or she? Or they? Or... it?
me
Did you fall in love with someone recently?
did you?
What are you wearing?
a strong sense of determination
What's the last month been like for you? With being off Facebook, and other stuff in general
i got hit by a car (metaphorically and literally) in february and realized that i needed to seriously adjust some things in my life and some of those things have been easy and a complete joy to adjust over the past few weeks (like leaving Facebook, starting/maintaining this site, creating art/music again, spending more time exploring and listening and learning) and some of those things have been unspeakably challenging/sad (like confronting some very serious/unethical situations at my employer of nearly six years, finally making some necessary medical appointments that i'd been intentionally putting off, stepping into the abyss of job hunting) but all in all, 2018 has been a beautiful reawakening of parts of me that i thought died a long time ago... with that said, big shifts in our lives (even positive ones) are not always easy and can be very confusing and frightening at times and sometimes we fuck things up on accident during the whirlwind... i feel like i'm in one of those videos where a deaf person has their new cochlear implant turned on and everybody softly and sweetly whispers "hello!", only in my case, my implant got turned on unexpectedly at a Springsteen concert during "Born to Run" while i was leaning up against a speaker on the front row
Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?
i can only hope that she found Waldo and they are living happily ever after
We're gonna miss you. :( Two-ply will never be the same. #workingatdook
it was time... it was way beyond time... it's been time for a long time
GRAAAAACE! I totally forgot about xkcd! Now I'm going back and reading all of them and I'm having flashbacks of grad school. I remember back in the day when you had the "FUCK. THAT. SHIT." one on your cube wall.
yeah, and it only took me like 10 more years before i actually listened!
What is the loneliest number?
240
Do you want a hug?
yes, as long as you really mean it
What confuses you?
pediatric cancer and non-pediatric cancer, how to survive loving and loathing humanity, why one seems to equal two and two seems to equal one, the complications of obtaining consent for courtship between hypnotists, why can't we play all the time in the park... you know, the usual
You better look out because I'm gonna say fuck. You! better! look! out! because! I'm! gonna! say! FUCK! FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!
#blessed
You should go back to teaching! Little ones love you and we need you more than ever!
it's on the list of consideration
Do you think Mr Rogers was gay?
no, mainly because i got to see an advanced screening of an upcoming documentary and in it, the actor who played Officer Clemmons said that during his later years working on the show, he was openly gay, and if anyone would know about Fred being closeted, it would be him... and he wanted to put it to rest that the answer is no, Fred Rogers was not gay
What attributes do you most appreciate in others?
authenticity, bashful confidence, confident bashfulness, curiosity, empathy, forgiveness, humility, humor, imperfection, ingenuity, integrity, kindness, patience, resilience, tenacity... a love for making lists of alphabetized attributes and/or a love of those who love making lists of alphabetized attributes
YES! BIRDIE STORIES! May I have another?!
his last words before he fell asleep tonight were, "when i turn 18, i'm going to build a tornado safe room for the house... and then i'm going to build a tornado"
Did you figure out the 9-5 thing you mentioned a few days ago?
not yet... still a̶n̶x̶i̶e̶t̶y̶ ̶v̶o̶m̶i̶t̶i̶n̶g̶ considering my options
What city outside of North Carolina do you visit most often?
Washington D.C.
Is ADHD real or is it just something used to medicate unruly kids?
i think that brain chemicals can be pretty wild and every person has to figure out how to manage theirs in whatever way is most functional for the life they want to live... for the record, i wasn't diagnosed with ADHD until i was 27 years old, so it's not just kids who are diagnosed... and without ADHD treatment, i'm not sure i would have had nearly as stable of a life as i've had over the past few years... i'm not saying the diagnosis is right for everyone (or for children), i'm just offering my personal experience
When are you gonna run for City Council, Madam?
reading that question literally made me shudder... so...
What are the best things about North Carolina?
i̶ ̶c̶a̶n̶'̶t̶ ̶v̶o̶u̶c̶h̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶a̶l̶l̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶N̶o̶r̶t̶h̶ ̶C̶a̶r̶o̶l̶i̶n̶a̶,̶ ̶b̶u̶t̶ ̶i̶'̶m̶ ̶p̶r̶e̶t̶t̶y̶ ̶p̶a̶s̶s̶i̶o̶n̶a̶t̶e̶ ̶a̶b̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶D̶u̶r̶h̶a̶m̶.̶.̶.̶ ̶i̶'̶m̶ ̶t̶h̶r̶e̶e̶ ̶h̶o̶u̶r̶s̶ ̶f̶r̶o̶m̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶b̶e̶a̶c̶h̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶t̶h̶r̶e̶e̶ ̶h̶o̶u̶r̶s̶ ̶f̶r̶o̶m̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶m̶o̶u̶n̶t̶a̶i̶n̶s̶.̶.̶.̶ ̶y̶e̶s̶t̶e̶r̶d̶a̶y̶,̶ ̶i̶ ̶c̶a̶l̶l̶e̶d̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶a̶ ̶r̶e̶p̶a̶i̶r̶ ̶o̶n̶ ̶m̶y̶ ̶w̶a̶t̶e̶r̶ ̶h̶e̶a̶t̶e̶r̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶p̶e̶r̶s̶o̶n̶ ̶w̶h̶o̶ ̶s̶h̶o̶w̶e̶d̶ ̶u̶p̶ ̶w̶a̶s̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶b̶a̶s̶s̶i̶s̶t̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶r̶o̶b̶e̶r̶t̶a̶ ̶f̶l̶a̶c̶k̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶a̶f̶t̶e̶r̶ ̶h̶e̶ ̶a̶d̶j̶u̶s̶t̶e̶d̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶t̶a̶n̶k̶,̶ ̶w̶e̶ ̶j̶a̶m̶m̶e̶d̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶1̶5̶ ̶m̶i̶n̶u̶t̶e̶s̶ ̶i̶n̶ ̶m̶y̶ ̶l̶i̶v̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶r̶o̶o̶m̶.̶.̶.̶ ̶t̶o̶d̶a̶y̶,̶ ̶m̶y̶ ̶s̶o̶n̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶i̶ ̶h̶a̶d̶ ̶p̶o̶p̶s̶i̶c̶l̶e̶s̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶b̶r̶a̶n̶f̶o̶r̶d̶ ̶m̶a̶r̶s̶a̶l̶i̶s̶.̶.̶.̶ ̶a̶ ̶f̶e̶w̶ ̶w̶e̶e̶k̶s̶ ̶a̶g̶o̶,̶ ̶i̶ ̶w̶a̶l̶k̶e̶d̶ ̶a̶r̶o̶u̶n̶d̶ ̶a̶ ̶g̶a̶r̶d̶e̶n̶ ̶s̶i̶n̶g̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶l̶o̶u̶d̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶s̶u̶n̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶p̶l̶a̶n̶t̶s̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶n̶o̶ ̶o̶n̶e̶ ̶b̶a̶t̶t̶e̶d̶ ̶a̶n̶ ̶e̶y̶e̶.̶.̶.̶ ̶s̶t̶u̶f̶f̶ ̶l̶i̶k̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶,̶ ̶i̶ ̶g̶u̶e̶s̶s̶
the best thing about North Carolina is that it's dull
You changed your playlist label on the home page from "seduce" to "communicate"-- why? Also, I may be too obsessed with your website and your life. :P
i just thought i was trying to do one thing and then realized i'm actually trying to do something else... also, keep in mind that this website is simply a playground for me to play in and (like my life) as much as it may appear that i have a plan, i'm really just winging it
Hey... I'm the person who asked about broken hearts and I was actually talking about grief and not like romantic heartbreak.
grief is its own animal for sure and, now that you mention it, one that i've been (not) dealing with lately... and i could/should never advise anyone on dealing with grief 'correctly' or 'functionally' because i'm actually really awful at big transitions and change, especially changes/transitions that are out of my control... when i lose something/someone unexpectedly, i often burn everything in my life to the ground perhaps out of the need to feel like i'm still in control of something... just know that feeling lost and angry and distraught and confused (and more) is totally understandable and no feeling is ever permanent
Okay but seriously: Why the FUCK is it still Winter? It's April! I shouldn't be shoveling snow.
it's actually sunny and in the 60s where i am (finally!!), so my little man and i are going to spend a good amount of time outside today to soak it up while it lasts... if it's still snowing where you are, just know that i'm sending you lots of warm thoughts and snuggles
Is your answer to the question about broken hearts how you personally operate or just what you think people should do? When I have a broken heart, I usually just cry and eat a lot. Maybe watch movies.
it's just how i personally operate... and i'd also say that sometimes broken hearts and broken minds are two sides of the same coin and to deal with the brain part, i guess i do some 'unique' things, too... but, ultimately, everybody needs to find their own ways of healing when their hearts/brains are hurting... for instance, my brain can sometimes send me some false/repetitive messaging like, 'you're hopeless' or 'you're too broken' or 'you're a mistake' or whatever other kind of lie and (along with talking with other people i trust about those lies so that those trusted other people can provide counter-arguments) i actively try to sort of 'reprogram' my brain when that's happening by listening to truthful alternative messaging on a loop... and i should note that i'm not giving 'official clinical advice' on this page (or ever), i'm just saying that it's more than okay and often wonderfully useful to create unique ways to solve problems and you should definitely try lots of things and see what works best for you
Do you think someone who participates in S&M is physically harming someone? What are your thoughts on polyamory?
consensual sensory exploration between people by definition can't be physically harmful, because it's consensual and the consensual ways (and numerical configurations) of how anyone chooses to live/love should be no one's concern except for the people involved in the exploring and the configuring
WHEN ARE YOU COMING TO NASHVILLE AGAIN?!?!?1?!1? p.s. i love you and i miss you
i actually thought a lot today about the fact that i haven't traveled since november and i really need to, so i'll probably pass through there in the next month or so... i promise to let folks know when i'm heading that way... (also, i don't know who this is, but i'm 100% sure that i love you and miss you, too)
Are you still doing stand up?
sometimes i also sit and lie down
Are you wearing pants right now?
no
What sorts of things/thoughts have been occupying your time lately?
i've been thinking a lot about how Love would never ever force lyrics on someone who prefers instrumental music and i've been wondering a lot about whether or not meteorologists ever feel embarrassed or ashamed when they get the forecast wrong
How do you mend a broken heart?
be immensely proud of yourself for taking the risk to love anything at all, redirect the love you were pouring out onto someone else onto yourself for a little while, send light and love and peace towards the sky for the other person(s) and trust that it will get where it needs to go, and listen to uplifting music that reminds you of your beauty and worth... (if you need song recommendations, let me know, but putting together your own list can often be better just because you'll feel more ownership/connection to the songs)
I'm sorry about the tactless jerk earlier in the questions. I do hope you eventually tell us about Conan and Ben and other celebrity friendship stories on the Reveal page.
'celebrity' is fake, evil, and toxic... no person on this earth has more/less worth than any other... i met conan for one day many years ago and we had a pleasant and uplifting interaction... ben and i are each other's AA sponsors, which works out great unless we're both off the wagon at the same time... i'll keep you posted if/when i have anything else to say about them or anyone else
Do you think you'd ever have it in you to physically harm another?
i have unfortunately experienced a number of instances of being a witness to violence and my first instinct is usually to dive into the middle and absorb the blows... i don't know if that answers your question
Your words give me ASMR feelings sometimes.
nice! i do tend to write (and sing and move and think and feel) in a somewhat soft/rhythmic way and if that gives other people peaceful/tingly feelings, then that certainly makes me happy
How are you today?
alive
Do you want to fuck me?
do You want to fuck you?
Did you fuck Conan?
something you should probably consider is that it's possible for people to love other people without those people always having sex with each other... if this is a new concept for you, i suggest you start by loving your siblings or parents or your elderly neighbors, etc. and once you successfully love them without having sex with them, work your way outwards from there
Did you fuck Ben Folds?
thank you for this incredibly invasive, rude question... perhaps you should ask yourself what you believe the answer to that question would tell you about me (or Ben) or what it says about you that you are interested enough to have chosen this question to ask out of an infinite number of potential questions
Do you still do improv? Why or why not?
isn't my entire life improv? isn't yours?
What did you eat for breakfast?
lunch
What's the best piece of advice anyone's ever given you?
take your broken heart and make it art
If you could be anywhere right now, where would it be?
in the words of Dave Matthews, "turns out, not where but who you're with that really matters"
Harry Anderson died??? FUCK! I'm so sorry. Do you know what happened?
he passed away unexpectedly and silently in his sleep next to his two dogs and a wife who loved him in their peaceful, beautiful home in the mountains... and for someone who had such a horrendous and tumultuous introduction to this planet, i can think of no better way for him to have gone out... i just wish it hadn't been as soon as it was
Just a head's up... that guy you posted talking about psychology and marriage is named Jordan Peterson and he's kinda awful. He's a transphobic asshole for real and way more "traditional" than I would ever have imagined you being okay with.
when i was in high school, i used to picket gay pride parades... i'm sure that piece of news about me is extremely disappointing to hear, but it's true... i was inexperienced, young, ignorant, and just plain wrong... but even then, i deserved to be heard and loved as i made my way further out of the darkness and into the Light... also, you'd be surprised what you can learn when you're willing to listen to those you sometimes disagree with and that goes for everyone on all sides of all arguments... as they say, 'even a broken clock is right twice a day'
Does every human being need to have a purpose? Or is it OK to just be?
it's impossible to just 'be' in this world... your existence changes the atmosphere no matter what... how much or in what way, well that's up to you... but, ultimately, the world is this incredible playground that you're plopped into and you can just sit on the ground and look at everyone else trying out all the playground equipment, or you can go play... it's always your choice... and if you're writing on this page, then that means that you and i are connected in some way and i have never crossed paths with someone and not had it change my molecular makeup and life trajectory, so if your plan was to just 'be' in this world, i have bad news: it's too late, you've already changed the world, because you changed mine (and i'm so grateful for it)
Are you the only person that creates on this site? Will that always be true? If it's not true, will you have to change the site domain?
right now, i'm the only person posting, but i'm letting the site develop naturally, so who knows what it will become over time... i try not to constrict my future if i can help it
Are you saying you're not a Christian? I kinda thought you might not be, but then sometimes I think that you are. You're kinda ambiguous about a lot of things, actually.
i think that the word 'christian' means a lot of different things to a lot of different people, as do most labels, so i refuse to label myself as anything and let other people label me however they choose... and on a related note, groups in general scare me and i don't like joining or being a part of any group... the things that people will allow themselves and others to do in groups is pretty awful
I'm really sorry about Harry. He was a great dude and he'll always be remembered and missed. Some of my favorite memories are of you busting out with the Night Court theme on that shitty bass guitar at the old apartment. Anyway, sending you lots of love tonight.
thank you
What is your current journey?
to love myself, love others, be honest, stay curious, and keep growing... and this week, i'm thinking a lot about whether there might be a better way of doing those things between 9am and 5pm Monday through Friday than how/where i'm currently spending that time
Which member of the Captain Planet team am I? I want to be heart, but I don't want the monkey.
only you know what your special ring does and you don't pick your spirit animal, your spirit animal picks you... if you're lucky, you'll get some sort of weird alcoholic gremlin that winks at you every morning when you wake up and always wants to listen to Al Green records like i did
What should I have for dinner?
breakfast
tell me something Weird about you that very few people know about
sometimes i bite into oranges like apples in the shower and scrub my body with them
Do you follow Jesus? Muhammad? Buddha? Jim Carrey?
yes, and sometimes me and sometimes you and sometimes others
I have an area in my classroom called the "breathing tent" where kids can go anytime they feel overwhelmed and just need a time-out to calm themselves and get centered again. There are colorful pillows and noise cancelling headphones and a notebook you can write or draw in. Your website feels like the breathing tent of the internet.
thank you, that's really sweet and it means a lot to me
How can we help people do the right thing?
forgive them when they do the wrong thing
How old should kids be before they're allowed to use cuss words? Do you let your son use cuss words around you?
i have always found the phenomenon of humanity inventing certain words with the express purpose of making them taboo to be particularly confounding... that said, the way i've explained it to my son is this: every environment you enter has rules and consequences... it's your job to find out what the rules are and what the consequences are and then determine your own choices from there as to whether you want to follow the rules of the environment or not... as for my house, i will not be bothered if you say, "i absolutely love the shit out of you!" to someone (and mean it), but i will be incredibly disappointed if you were to say to someone, "i think your shirt is ugly"... one set of words is meant to build someone up and one is meant to tear them down, so i find one to be vulgar and the other not to be based on the intended outcome
I notice some sections are updated more often than others... how do you decide how/when to update? Do you have a schedule for posting?
i run the website, the website does not run me... this site is merely a place to report back on my findings, it's not the Finding... i hope to learn something new every day and be able to share that here, but i imagine that some days i'll have lots of things to share and some days not as much... i'll just ask/seek/knock the best i can and let the outcome of that work itself out in its own time
Who are the most important people in your life, and why?
there are many ways to answer this question and i feel like all of them would be 100% accurate, even though they'd all be different... each person that i'm with at any given time is the most important person in my life for that moment in time... my son is my Compass and without him i'd be truly adrift... i've lived in three different locations in my life and in each one, i've been blessed to be given a friend who has loved me for who i've been, who i am, and who i will be... and i've also recently been explosively inspired by someone enormously special-- the fruit of this creative union is apparent in the creation of this site and hopefully in many more ways to come
I think it's hilarious that we all begged you to start a blog years ago and you refused and then when you finally did, you've started like a half dozen blogs. You're ridiculously stubborn, but I love it. How do you decide what goes where? Like some of the things that make me laugh also make me think and some of the things that you have in 'revolt' make me ask myself questions and whatnot.
i never do things until the time is right, i guess, and i definitely don't do things just because people want me to do them, but it appears you're well aware of this... and i think if you think a bit more about my page and how it's set up, you'll learn something interesting about the fluidity of arbitrary categories
and you shall find.
yep... i always took the "ask/seek/knock" directive as another boring platitude until i actually started to ask a lot of questions, seek out answers, and knock on every door i could find... then i realized how powerful and true those words really are... i suppose another way of saying it is, "think, listen, act"
I've known you for a long time and you don't do things without an end game in mind... what's the end game on this website?
it's the same end game as i've had for every other project i've ever undertaken in my life: to gather all those with special rings and convince them to point their lights in the same direction so we can summon Captain Planet and heal the world
Okay, so when I clicked on "KNOCK" and it morphed into, "i'm proud of you", I legit started crying.
it's the truth
Hi!
!iH
Why did you leave me?
i don't know who is asking or if you're referencing leaving Facebook or if you're just teasing, so this is a tough question to answer, but... let's assume you're being serious just in case: i want the best for every person and in some cases, i learn over time that i am not the best for someone and so i let them go so that they can find what/who IS best for them... and (as far as i know) in every one of the few cases that i can think of where i've let someone go, they have found their Home... it's happened enough times that i sometimes joke that i'm a 'human layover' because i tend to help folks regroup and refuel and then make it to their final destination... and if that's my lot in life, i'm okay with that... it seems like an important and helpful Job
As you put more links on the front page, it looks like you're building a picture of something. Is it a robot or a person or something else? Actually, it could also be an angel and the "stay tuned for fresh wonder" is a halo?
sometimes i think all of existence is an infinite rorschach test
How many of these questions do you write yourself?
how many of these questions do You write yourself?
Why don't you have a mobile version of the site? The way it is now, I have to go out of my way to turn my phone sideways and zoom in and out to see anything.
if you look and listen carefully, you may notice that you might have answered your own question
How do you have time to do all the things that you do?
we all make time for the things that are important to us or for the things that we feel are urgent... the trick to getting more time is to not let others be time burglars convincing you that certain things are urgent when they are not... trust yourself to determine what is and is not urgent
Is censorship a good thing sometimes? Isn't it possible for all things to be good in some cases?
no
You've left Easter eggs all over this thing, haven't you? Tell me where they are! #notaquestion
it's not an easter egg hunt if i tell you where all the eggs are! also, this isn't a questions page, it's an area to ask, seek, and/or knock... there are lots of ways to do that and sometimes the question is an answer and sometimes the answer is a question
I doubt you'll comment publicly, but I guess I will ask/seek/knock anyway: what are your thoughts on the Zuckerberg hearings?
i believe Mark was chosen for an enormous Purpose and he lived that Purpose so well at first, but (like perhaps all of us given such an enormous Gift) he became immersed in his own reflection, took his eyes off the Ball and became more interested in his own power and less invested in the Mission... and then the Jokers came in and trashed the place... Mark deserves this spanking and i hope he uses this wake-up Call to turn things around, because the Team needs him back in the Game
Are you anti-capitalization?
i've actually always been a stickler/perfectionist towards my own use of grammar, punctuation, spelling, etc. even in personal text messages, but i'm trying to learn how to loosen up and relax a bit more these days and have found that writing in all lowercase is surprisingly calming to me in certain situations (this q&a section being one)
Why do elephants eat fermented fruit?
probably for the same reason that wallabies graze on poppy fields: they want to have a good time and don't have to worry about homelessness, job loss, societal pressure and/or calf custody hearings
I love you, Gracie!
i love you, too
I hope it's okay to say this and you don't have to post this, but... did you seriously forgive Zach? I don't know how I feel about that.
yes... everyone deserves a fresh start and i have every confidence that he'll make the most of his
Are you going to post about your kiddo here? I notice he doesn't have a link yet.
he is now of the age where he is going to make his own decisions (with the oversight of his dad and mom, of course) about what he chooses to post online, if anything... if/when he decides he'd like to post his own creative work online somewhere, i'll let you know... in the meantime, he's going to have some breathing room to grow up without a studio audience
I'm going to miss you on Facebook. You were most of the reason I logged on there every day. Not really a question... just the truth.
you're not the only person to tell me this and i appreciate it... it's also part of the reason i needed to leave... i felt guilty that i was pulling more folks into the lion's den... and actually, without the limitations of facebook, i can post way more here on my own site, so i really haven't gone anywhere, i've gone everywhere and you're welcome to come along with me
What made you decide to finally bite the bullet and start your own site?
i was inspired by running across someone even more free than i was and that made me want to become more free, too... i think that's how life works... as we become more and more free, we (unconsciously and consciously) inspire freedom in others
why don't you want someone to hammer a nail into your foot?
When is the last time you were in a monogamous relationship and how long did it last?
2005-2012
hey hey hey heeeeeeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyy can u post the video of u with wayne bradyyyy? thx
my episode of Let's Make a Deal is a special Tony Awards episode meant to air the Friday before the Sunday Tonys and the Tonys have been postponed indefinitely, so i'm not sure when it will air
Which lives don't matter?
you decide
what drugs should i experiment with in quarantine
love
Where in the world did you get the idea that you can be anything in this world?
everywhere
my dad is a child molestor
perhaps your dad will die a slow and painful death like mine did
People say to me "everything is going to be okay" but they don't know if that is true or not. They're just saying that to try and make me feel better. I fucking hate it.
that's true... only you can decide whether things are or ever will be okay or not or even what 'okay' means
I told someone five years ago that I never want to talk to them again for the rest of my life, but I changed my mind and I would like to talk to them now. What should I do?
i suppose you could contact them to ask if they'd like to have a conversation with you about all the things that you've both changed your mind about between then and now
you have a beautiful voice and it makes me feel safe when I listen to you sing so thank you for singing and sharing it
thank you for listening
WHY HAVEN'T YOU TAKEN THIS WEBSITE DOWN YET YOU FUCKING INSANE CUNT? I'M GOING TO GUT YOU LIKE THE FAT NASTY PIG YOU ARE YOU BITCH
i've gained about 15 pounds so far this year, so be sure and bring a few extra plates for the gutting
Not to be a nuisance, but you haven't updated the Play page with lyrics yet.
thank you for the reminder
what should i put on the ceiling
lamps
Is it okay that I am asexual? Are you asexual?
my three best friends are asexual and they are the three best people i know... i have no idea if those two things are correlated or not... i am not asexual
I saw you linked to my video on YouTube! Thank you!
i don't know which one was yours, but it must have inspired me in some way, so great job and you're welcome
Should I wear a mask?
have you ever taken it off?
That story about Megan's dad is horrific. I'm so sorry. He seems like a wonderful man. Why would he do something like that? I've never even heard that people could kill themselves that way. It seems like the most painful way to go. There are no words and I'm just really sorry for everyone. I love you, Grace.
<3
If you could take one of your neuro-atypical traits and make it a neuro-typical trait, what would it be and why?
i wish i didn't need to rock myself back and forth for hours at a time in order to process things... though i have been able to pick and choose when/where to 'stim', the need to do it at least daily (and often before sleep) complicates romantic relationships (can't really share a bed as comfortably/regularly as non-autistic people can) and it just takes up a lot of time in my life that could be used for other things
How do I find someone who will love me for me?
step one: locate a mirror
What's the new obsession?
raccoons
Favorite artist of the 2020s so far?
you
What do you miss most during quarantine?
the freedom to have someone openly cough into my mouth in a crowded target
Where did your Twitter go?
social media distancing
I have never been more lonely in my entire life. Now I'm typing into a random stranger's suggestion comment box just to feel like I have someone to talk to. Fuck, what is even the point of anything?
hi
i really liked the answer "let go of your attachment to hell" thanks
this entire website is just a place for me to try to work my own endless existential shit out, so i'm always surprised and heartened when someone else gets something out of it, too... (thank you)
What is the last song you listened to ? this is what i just listened to - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CKSvY4ya0Lk
i clicked on that and listened to it, so now that is the last song that i listened to... A+ selection, josh turner is a really neat human being who has been doing lovely things for a long time
I can't be sure, but I think you answered one of my really old questions recently. Did you go back or did someone ask the same thing? Either way, thanks! Hope you and your family are well.
i have a pile of submissions from this page and i don't put them on this page in any particular order... some i don't respond to at all, some i respond to weeks later, some i immediately respond to... this page is about as disorganized as it could be, but i'm a selfish stupid whore, so be sure and keep your expectations low
lolololol i can't stop singing she's so fucking dumb ahhhhAHHHHAHHHHH hahahahahahha
we all are fucking dumb... and if you think she's dumb, you should check out me or even yourself in the mirror... amazing how fucking selfish and stupid we all are sometimes... i reach new levels of it all the time and i wouldn't see it in her if i didn't have twice as much of it in myself, i assure you
What part of "LOVE OTHERS" is the part where you tell someone's wife that she's "fucking stupid" and a "selfish stupid whore"?
that improvised song really falls more under the category of 'be honest'... and if i'm being honest, sometimes i don't love others (or myself)... hopefully i will 'keep growing' until i get there, but obviously still a long long way to go
Am I essential?
yes, absolutely
Are you a mean girl?
i am whatever you think i am
omfg tattoo artist for teeth lmao is that real
yes, it's pretty interesting and unique for sure
In the past decade, have you ever gone longer than a year without having sex?
no
Those who would trade liberty for security deserve neither.
with liberty comes responsibility... those who would use their liberty to stomp out the vulnerable instead of sacrifice for them... need to perhaps reconsider
Did you get laid off because of the rona?
no, i actually got a raise
Could you put the lyrics up to the songs on the play page? I want to sing along sometimes and I'm not sure I'm saying the right words.
that's a good idea and i will try to get to it soon, but if you have any questions in the meantime, you can ask here and that might be faster
Will you marry me?
sorry, i'm all out of goats for the dowry
Are you a good or a bad person?
and
i love you
that's what they all say
How does the collaboration with you and Mitch work? Do you come up with a song and then he comes up with lyrics or do you both come up with parts of it? Who plays what instruments? Do you record it live in a studio somewhere?
he makes the songs and i translate them into english
Why do you like to be alive?
fresh wonder
Hey, I just wanted to say that I'm sorry.
it's okay
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU
the fuck
Is it Easter yet?
you decide
So are you working for the census now?
i am the census
thanks for the row your boat wisdom can i have another
stop, collaborate, and listen
How do I get to heaven?
let go of your attachment to hell
What was your highlight of 2019
it was a tie between getting to know me and getting to know you
WHORE
ah, yes... i missed you, too
Is it tough being so awesome?
sometimes i become so full of awe that i completely short circuit
What's the password for the play page?
my locker combination
Where did you go and why can't I get into the play page anymore?
time out
You've come a long way since "I only know three chords"= it makes me think that maybe you knew more than three chords all along?
more than three chords know me, i can tell you that much
How can I let go of my soon-to-be-ex-wife? We have been separated for a year-and-a-half, and my love for her is just as potent as it was on the day we separated. There have been times I've resented her, even hated her, but the feelings of love always return. I deeply failed her as a husband and don't blame her for kicking my ass to the curb, but God I miss her. And my heart still flutters when I see her.
you're human, and so is she... forgive yourself, forgive her... there will be other balloons and your instincts will be just as horrendous then as they probably were before, but hopefully some piece of this pain will remain with you so that you can make better choices next time... if not, though, you'll try again and again until you figure it out... that's all we're here on this earth to do, i think... to keep trying again and again and again (and again) until we figure it out
Work for the census! It's a job that only happens every 10 years!
that sounds like a good idea
How are you feeling?
great! never better! you?
Hey ! I'm the guy from a long time ago who ask you about what signs you parked near when you worked at the construction and I'm wondering what sign you park to at your new work ?
this
okay now what
sing
What the fuck is going on?
everything, at least once
What's it gonna be like when all of our consciencousness is uploaded to a shared cloud and we can just not even have to use words to talk and just know each other's feelings just by looking or feeling them together or whatever? Elon Musk says we will have that capability by 2050.
i bet, initially, a lot of folks are going to be absolutely fucking floored by the enormous chasm between what people have said about how they're feeling and what people have actually been feeling
Let's take a nap?
that sounds nice
You're never going to be successful if you don't take a leap and move to New York City. Moving from the middle of nowhere to New York City was the best decision I ever made. I had to leave a lot of family and friends behind, but I've made a lot of new ones and it was worth it to be able to reach the success I have now. You can't reach success trying to bat from the bleachers... have you not noticed that every single person you admire moved to New York City? Most people live a life of mediocrity. If that's what you want, then fine. But I think it's an enormous waste of your gifts and what you're capable of.
you clearly have no idea who i admire and i suspect that you have no idea what success is
Did you know that Lexapro makes your dick stop working? Because Lexapro makes your dick stop working.
i do not have a dick and have no experience with lexapro, which is (i assume?) a drug of some kind and not just the name of a mean giant that punches you in the dick?
Are your needs in spring and summer are different than your needs in fall and winter or they always the same?
sometimes i wear sandals and sometimes i wear boots, depending on the needs of my feet at any given time/temperature
Which attachment style are you: anxious, avoidant, anxious-avoidant, or secure?
thank you for taking this buzzfeed quiz! your spirit animal is: tiger
What was the person talking about who was saying stuff about you hanging out with a homeless guy?
pretty sure it was a reference to the caption/set of photos here, which was a reference to this
any thoughts on taking mental health medications or therapy or illegal drug use or electroshock or screaming until you lose your voice or running naked through the streets?
do whatever you need to do to stay in the game [tldr; don't die]
What's the last question you asked yourself?
how the hell did i not know that tyler's family was on family feud like four times back in the day???
The problem is that I cannot produce anything when I get into the darkest places. I can't take my broken heart and make it art when I can't even move. I can't even breathe. There aren't any words left. I can't make something out of nothing when I can't even explain how I feel.
you just made something right now by writing this and i'm proud of you
He's an idiot.
aren't we all
Should I get a roommate?
could be nice
Hey, I just wanted to say fuck that person who called you a cunt. They clearly do not know you and you are one of the most inspirational people I've ever met. You are very loved and you always will be. I hope they get help, because they are clearly fucking awful.
thanks... but, i'm definitely a self-righteous cunt sometimes, so i don't mind the reminder :)
Have you seen these? How does he have such unbelievable fearlessness?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_3LbtAP-AoE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QE7XssZc4pc
probably just balancing himself out after unbelievable fearfulness at another time
Should I lock up my partner to make sure that they don't ever leave me?
be the best person you could ever be and they won't need to leave and you won't care if they do
Since you record everything, do you record yourself having sex with people? Can I hear it?
there are lots of instances on this website and elsewhere of me making love with people
You are such a self-righteous cunt. You hung out with a homeless guy and you want an award? Fuck you. You could have at least got him somewhere to stay. But you just wanted to use him for an instagram post. More bonus points for you. I see through that shit.
i wanted to invite him to the airbnb, but it was not my house and therefore not my right to do that... it's important to me to document my days and my journeys right now, but i'm actually doing my best not to publicize it broadly while still having a few people follow along if they would like and they can get anything out of it... i'm sorry the journey i'm going on is making you so upset, but all i can do is suggest you go on your own journey and ignore mine completely
Why do you want to hold hands with strangers?
to prove that no one is a stranger
ANSWER MY FUCKING QUESTIONS YOU IGNORANT CUNT
size does matter, but not of the organ you're thinking of
What did you win on Let's Make a Deal?
confirmation and direction
How do I tell the girl I love that I love her?
show her
Do you have a secret admirer?
everyone does
Why aren't you famous?
good luck and protection from good friends
LOS ANGELES
it's like every city you've ever been to, but with 200% more celebrities and dead people laying in the street
Do you drink coffee or tea?
no
How do I find the perfect job?
HAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA change it every 60-90 days and become a professional job changer
poop butthole poop with the butts butts when i squeeze the shit out going oout the butthole to the toilet and out it goes down to the adventure through te plumbing system metal and the tubes and where am i going traveling along hellop mr pee pee and toothpaste and traveling we are coming with tme to the oddyssey and is it sanitation and the filter and back int he faucet and i'm drinking the poop when i turn on the sink and it's deliciouis poop woooooo
good work documenting the journey! keep it up
Do you think you have the capability of monogamy?
i have the capability of nogamy!
what do mental illnessssssssssss
try them all out for research purposes and select the one(s) that are best for you
Why do you like game shows so much?
light, color, music, gifts, puzzles, joy
Do you think you are wise? Is that why you have a questions page?
i think you are wise and i have an answers page because you are the answer
Why would anyone want to crawl out of love?
to experience falling back in?
Do you know any other languages?
other languages know me
Why does my earwax smell like chocolate
block age
What is one thing you've learned about yourself in 2019 that you did not know about yourself in 2018?
i want to hold your hand
I know all of your secrets.
NICE! could you tell me some of them, because i'm sure i forgot
You said there are Easter eggs on this website. Tell me where to find some! I have been looking all over and clicking on periods and whatever and I'm not finding anything.
i honestly don't remember where they all are, although i know for sure there was one in the 'write' post about easter eggs... not really the job of the bunny to find the eggs for you
What city shoudl I go work in?
universe city
What's the best prize of all?
sir
When are you going to game show number two?
already went, but there will be more after that
You want us to seek. But what are you seeking?
see king
Weekend plans?
tend the garden
Favorite fall activity?
trust
WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT
i want to fuck the whole world relentlessly in the brain stem until its heart cums for the rest of eternity
ur writing is so good that i feel like if i don't do my words just right u will judge me n say im stupid n worthless
that's okay... i feel that way about music/musicians
How do I avoid contacting my ex? It's so tempting sometimes.
go back and find/compile all the most hurtful things they ever said or did to you and hang it somewhere where you can see it and then when you're tempted to see them through rose-colored glasses, read through the facts again... it might not always work, but it will hopefully pull you back from the ledge at least a bit
Do you ever have recurring dreams or nightmares and if so what are they?
all my teeth suddenly turning thin/fragile and falling out... haven't had that one in a long time, though
When in the Course of human events it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation. We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. — That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, — That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security. — Such has been the patient sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Government. The history of the present King of Great Britain is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these States. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world. He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good. He has forbidden his Governors to pass Laws of immediate and pressing importance, unless suspended in their operation till his Assent should be obtained; and when so suspended, he has utterly neglected to attend to them. He has refused to pass other Laws for the accommodation of large districts of people, unless those people would relinquish the right of Representation in the Legislature, a right inestimable to them and formidable to tyrants only. He has called together legislative bodies at places unusual, uncomfortable, and distant from the depository of their Public Records, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with his measures. He has dissolved Representative Houses repeatedly, for opposing with manly firmness his invasions on the rights of the people. He has refused for a long time, after such dissolutions, to cause others to be elected, whereby the Legislative Powers, incapable of Annihilation, have returned to the People at large for their exercise; the State remaining in the mean time exposed to all the dangers of invasion from without, and convulsions within. He has endeavoured to prevent the population of these States; for that purpose obstructing the Laws for Naturalization of Foreigners; refusing to pass others to encourage their migrations hither, and raising the conditions of new Appropriations of Lands. He has obstructed the Administration of Justice by refusing his Assent to Laws for establishing Judiciary Powers. He has made Judges dependent on his Will alone for the tenure of their offices, and the amount and payment of their salaries. He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harass our people and eat out their substance. He has kept among us, in times of peace, Standing Armies without the Consent of our legislatures. He has affected to render the Military independent of and superior to the Civil Power. He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution, and unacknowledged by our laws; giving his Assent to their Acts of pretended Legislation: For quartering large bodies of armed troops among us: For protecting them, by a mock Trial from punishment for any Murders which they should commit on the Inhabitants of these States: For cutting off our Trade with all parts of the world: For imposing Taxes on us without our Consent: For depriving us in many cases, of the benefit of Trial by Jury: For transporting us beyond Seas to be tried for pretended offences: For abolishing the free System of English Laws in a neighbouring Province, establishing therein an Arbitrary government, and enlarging its Boundaries so as to render it at once an example and fit instrument for introducing the same absolute rule into these Colonies For taking away our Charters, abolishing our most valuable Laws and altering fundamentally the Forms of our Governments: For suspending our own Legislatures, and declaring themselves invested with power to legislate for us in all cases whatsoever. He has abdicated Government here, by declaring us out of his Protection and waging War against us. He has plundered our seas, ravaged our coasts, burnt our towns, and destroyed the lives of our people. He is at this time transporting large Armies of foreign Mercenaries to compleat the works of death, desolation, and tyranny, already begun with circumstances of Cruelty & Perfidy scarcely paralleled in the most barbarous ages, and totally unworthy the Head of a civilized nation. He has constrained our fellow Citizens taken Captive on the high Seas to bear Arms against their Country, to become the executioners of their friends and Brethren, or to fall themselves by their Hands. He has excited domestic insurrections amongst us, and has endeavoured to bring on the inhabitants of our frontiers, the merciless Indian Savages whose known rule of warfare, is an undistinguished destruction of all ages, sexes and conditions. In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Prince, whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people. Nor have We been wanting in attentions to our British brethren. We have warned them from time to time of attempts by their legislature to extend an unwarrantable jurisdiction over us. We have reminded them of the circumstances of our emigration and settlement here. We have appealed to their native justice and magnanimity, and we have conjured them by the ties of our common kindred to disavow these usurpations, which would inevitably interrupt our connections and correspondence. They too have been deaf to the voice of justice and of consanguinity. We must, therefore, acquiesce in the necessity, which denounces our Separation, and hold them, as we hold the rest of mankind, Enemies in War, in Peace Friends. We, therefore, the Representatives of the united States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That these united Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States, that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Great Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent States, they have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace, contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may of right do. — And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of Divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes, and our sacred Honor.
wow... who the fuck are they calling 'merciless indian savages'???
Why don't you do drugs?
drugs do me
What are your goals?
#goals
What if I never find love?
be the love that finds someone else
what happens when i put something here
now you know! wasn't that fun? i wonder what else is possible?
How do I tell the girl I like that I like her?
try a way that you've never tried before
Are you married?
are you?
What's that sound?
fire alarm
Will you write a book someday? You're an amazing writer and people should hear your stories.
i prefer to tell stories one at a time as they happen... if someone wants to compile them someday or redistribute them, they are more than welcome to as long as they don't edit it or sell it
Why are you scared of the internet?
have you seen it?
u r fake and gay
aren't we all
What's the stupidest thing you can't stop doing?
reading internet comments
Hey, Gracie. Drink some water. I love you.
thank you
Just saw the new honor page update. I'm so sorry for your loss, Grace. But, it wasn't your fault. You know that. You did everything you could. Also, fuck your shitty dad in heaven.
oh, it's all of our losses, for sure... also, your ending made me lol in the midst of tears, A+
my mum told me I am accident . now i sads
imagine how folks conceived by rape feel
How many commandments have you broken?
i'm pretty sure that i broke all of them before i hit 21
you are sexually attracted to white dudes with four letter first names
<jesus and satan give each other resigned glances and walk away in disappointment>
Do you ever record songs and not post them online?
yes
TELL THAT ONE GUY TO STOP SCREAMING AT YOU WHAT THE FUCK
who says it's a guy?
you're really something else
that's true
Let's lay on a blanket and listen to the air on our ear lobes and say nothing until we both die.
where?
I DO NOT LOVE YOU AND I NEVER LOVED YOU AND I WILL NEVER LOVE YOU
i know
Is your reddit name abstractstrategy because you play those kinds of games??
what kind of games?
Your voice is really delicate.
when?
How do I quit cigarettes? I fucking LOVE cigarettes.
why would you want to quit something you love?
I went exploring in a cave and now my arm is stuck under a boulder.
is there a sharp object around?
Did you get Easter for your birthday?
easter got me... always does
i like your questions page better than the bill wurtz questions page
this is not a questions page
MAKE ME LAUGH CLOWN
can i phone a friend?
There's nothing wrong with crying! I cry when I'm happy sometimes too. They don't have words for that emotion.
there are lots of emotions that don't seem to have words, and that's probably where art/music/theatre/etc come in
Have you ever fallen out of love with someone?
you can't fall out of love, you can only fall in... getting out is usually a slow crawl
Will you ever be satisfied?
i was going to say 'i hope so', but now that i think about it, probably not until i'm dead... and probably not then either
Any music recommendations?
i stumbled onto this today and i love it because the title suggests you're getting one thing, but you're actually getting much more
How many visitors per day do you have on this website? More than 1000? Less than 10? Why don't you promote it more?
the site only works if it's just between the two of us
What is something beautiful you saw today?
there was a woman and man at the bus stop and the woman was holding the man's hand and looking up at him like he hung the moon and he looked like he had about three pennies to his name and i am quite sure he was the richest man i've ever seen
I would like to get you Easter for your birthday. Where can I buy Easter?
easter cannot be purchased
This box is really big. I'm not sure there's any limit as to what I put in here. Everyone else seems to just write one thing or one question, but they could write a whole novel in here if they wanted. Why do people limit themselves so much? WhY Do TheY dO eVeRythInG tHe WAAAAAAY it has been done B4?
inertia
I did 9/11.
i'm proud of you... next up, try 9/12
Give me something to do today?
move (forward, if at all possible... baby steps count)
Is your vagina dead?
not that i'm aware of
Did you know that your birthday falls on the 240th day of the year?
i did not know that
any advice for me
go where the love is
What do you want for your birthday?
easter
heads or tails?
heads
How many of these questions do you write yourself?
all of them except this one
WHAT??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
EXACTLY
what??????????????????????????????????????????????????????
exactly
What aren't you afraid of?
you
YOU ARE NASTY SLUT WHORE CUNT WHO CANNOT BE TRUSTED
seems legit
more songs please
more patience please
What is your goal for the Let's Make a Deal trip?
same as it was for The Price is Right... send out a message to those who feel forgotten and invisible that someone sees them
How many answers do you have?
somewhere between zero and one
Why am I so sad?
you haven't started the list of why you're so happy yet
What was the biggest difference between France and the US?
for me, the most notable thing was the lack of awkwardness/shame surrounding sex in france... people were being physically affectionate everywhere you looked, condom dispensers were readily available on every street corner, and the morning after pill was accessible (in the airport even!) for very little cost in five minutes with no questions asked
Did you experience any culture shock in France?
i think my experience there was a bit unusual, as i was with americans/brits/australians who spoke english pretty much the entire time, so i didn't experience as much 'shock' as i might have otherwise
it was sweet when you said you feel things in big ways and that's okay. What was the last thing that made you cry tears of happy?
i'm not sure this counts as a full-fledged cry, but i did get a bit teary over this earlier in the morning
Who would you love to interview?
i want to interview the first person to find out that certain types of corn explode into something different and awesome when you heat it up enough! what did that discovery feel like? after that, did you just start burning everything to see what would happen? who did you tell about what you'd discovered? how did they respond? then what happened?
Is kissing cheating? Is looking at a pretty girl for too long cheating? Is jacking off to porn cheating? What is cheating? Where is the line?
people set their own rules and those rules vary enormously, so i would say the definition is between you and whoever you've struck up a contract with
Should I quit my job?
sometimes if you're lucky, the job quits you!
I listened to the post where you talk about meeting Conan and I think it's really cool that you've rubbed elbows with celebrities and tried to impact their lives in a positive way. Care to share another celebrity therapy session?
my friend's nine year old daughter declined light up shoes during back to school shopping last week because, "the shooter can find me easier if my shoes light up"
Do you miss France?
it feels more like i'm playing bingo and france was G-24 and G-24 was on my board, so i stamped it and it was thrilling (because it got me closer to getting the bingo) ... **to be clear, G-24 was extremely important and nothing is possible without G-24** ... but i'm not spending my time reminiscing about the thrill of stamping G-24 as much as i am anxiously/excitedly anticipating the next ball to roll out of the bingo cage
What game show should I go on?
spoiler alert: you're already on one, but don't worry... everyone wins!
Does Jolene listen to Dolly or does she go on ahead and steal Dolly's man?
plot twist: jolene is actually a lesbian and was never interested in dolly's man in that way to begin with, so dolly doesn't have anything to worry about... well, maybe she does, but it sure as fuck isn't jolene's fault
Do I have a soulmate?
you decide
What color is the sky?
you decide
Can you have success AND longevity in a romantic relationship? You seem to think you have to pick.
i think it's wonderful if you can find both, but i'm not sure you can know ahead of time that either of those things will happen (despite your best intentions) and knowing when to end something that needs to end can be seen as a success, too... i didn't select my three besties knowing from the beginning that they'd still be around years later... i just knew they were wonderful people and i watered the friendship plant a little every day and then years later (or even decades later), i see they're still by my side... but not every plant i've ever watered is... and i'm not sure there's anything anyone can do about that (and in some cases, it's a very good thing), so the mystery of relationships is perhaps just one of the challenging things about life that we must learn to accept with gratitude, even when we don't always understand why things work out the way they work out... i hope that makes sense
I'm scared of everything.
that's okay
Can you love someone you don't know?
who do you know? are you sure?
If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you want to live?
any place can be the right place with the right person
Have you ever gone skiing or snowboarding?
no
Why don't you answer my questions?
i may have answered them earlier in the list
How much money do you make on this website?
HAHAHAHAHHAHA
Finding out your friend's dad was dying at the end of the trip was (as you said in your song before you left) a fucking horrible plot twist. That's nuts. What do you think it means?
trips have many chapters... the end of one is the beginning of another
After all the talking and gaining wisdom and whatnot from the elders on the boat, do you think you have any new ideas about relationships and how to have a long and successful one?
well, this may be an unpopular opinion, but i think longevity in a relationship is not necessarily a thing to be celebrated... my mom's parents (who i've only met once) have been married for like 60+ years and the husband still beats the wife... a relationship can last five days or fifty years and both be considered successful in my eyes... and i think we all ask the question 'what's the secret?' when what we mean is, 'is there any way i can avoid pain when i love?' and the answer to that is 'no'... there's going to be pain somewhere along the way or perhaps many times and it cannot be avoided... the question is whether you believe it's worth the risk
It sounds like you struck up quite the bond with the chef on your trip. Do you have plans to meet up again? And the old man drinking Guinness sounds sweet.
the only plans i have right now are to go to Washington DC this weekend and then to Los Angeles at the end of September for another game show (gotta keep up with Eileen!)... i do not have any current plans to meet up with anyone from the trip in the future... but to be fair, i never planned to meet any of them in the first place, so i suppose we shall all just have to wait and see where life takes us
What's at the end of the rainbow?
let's go find out together!
I listened to that one post of your first dance wedding song and when you said "I haven't found that yet but I have hope" I straight up started ugly crying in my office. You're a beautiful human being and you deserve every happiness.
you're sweet... thank you
What's next?
depends on if i go with what's behind door number 1, number 2, or number 3
Hi. Hey. Hi. Yo. Hello. I liked your use of the narrator on the instagram feed. Very classy... MORE NARRATOR NEXT TIME. that was my favorite plot line. k thx baiii
Narrator: As she looked towards the moon and laughed, she accidentally tipped her glass over and what was left of the wine spilled out onto the bench cushion next to her.
Grace: "Oh no! Oh no. I've ruined it. I've ruined it."
Chef: "Ruined what?"
Grace: "Oh... well, I was going to ask you to sit next to me... and I ruined it."
Narrator: The Chef sat down in the wine.
Your trip looked great. What was the highlight for you?
love, trust, courage, and growth
Are you going to close this site down for the fall and winter again like you did last year? Could I maybe ask you to leave it up even if you go into hibernation or exploration or meditation or whatever?
i'll think about it
Your trip looks so amazing!!! Are you going to move to France?
not right now
what's France like
visceral
Why was earth angel the 1st dance song of your wedding? That song is so old tho .........
it was the song that was playing when my delorean got here
Is it legal to record people all the time?
everything is illegal
Did I miss the boat?
boats are infinite, there are always more boats
What's the tent video about?
you tell me
What game are we playing?
you tell me
Is everything going to be okay?
yes
Are you in France now? How is it?
i leave on friday aug 2nd and plan to return sunday aug 11th... will update this feed as much as i can, but have no idea if/when i'll have internet access during the trip
The "family" video is disturbing, because it shows how, when the happy major chords of family obligation fade away, you can hear the silent suffering and discontent they drowned out. If we were all more comfortable with Marc's silence, we could hear the suffering. Grace does like to play with fire, and she should remember, like anyone who does, that it has burnt down what she has built up. But when you're nothing but tired, you can't start a fire without a spark. You can't start a fire worrying about your little world falling apart.
you lost me a bit at the end there, but i will say that though fire can certainly be destructive, it can also be a refining thing when it burns away the unnecessary and leaves behind the indestructible [edit: just realized those are Springsteen lyrics at the end, i’m a fucking idiot... but what i said stands]
Are you lonely?
are you?
What are you going to do in France?
bandage up my ear
I don't get the tent thing you posted.
that's okay
Wait, did you have a baby? CONGRATS!
my best friend did
I can't stop crying and listening to the Welcome To The World song. I have had it on repeat for hours. The puzzling thing is that I can't tell if I think the song is happy or sad for some reason. Is it happy or sad? Are you happy or sad? Is the baby okay?
she's a bit early (although not as early as we feared she'd be), and she's doing great... when my own son was born, i was holding him and crying and everyone asked what was wrong and i said, "he's going to go to college" and everyone laughed and said "not for a long time" and they didn't understand that what i was trying to communicate was that he was perfect and pure and i had realized while looking at his beautiful newness that i was not going to be able to protect him from the challenges of the world (nor should i... that's where the learning comes from) and i felt the full reality of that truth in that very moment... entering this world is simultaneously a beautiful thing and also a tragic thing, just like the world itself
Just want to say to the person who is shitting on your tiktok that I don't know what they're problem is because I like it. You seem to have some judgemental friends
it's okay, i'm not sure i really like it either... sometimes creative experimentation involves trying things you're not sure you'll like so you can see if you like it or not, but i'm glad it's had some meaning for you
You're incredibly seductive.
conductive
Maybe Jesus was wrong? Maybe he didn't even exist? Maybe people made up all those stories to control other people? Maybe it isn't anyone's job to save anyone else? Maybe gurus and philosophers and priests and shaman are all bullshit?
be that as it may
i want to fuck u in the eye
i'm not an expert, but there's probably better ways to do it
GOD IS DEAD GOD IS DEAD GOD IS DEAD GOD IS DEAD GOD IS DEAD GOD IS DEAD GOD IS DEAD
e-Dog is Dad?
Your tiktok isn't very uplifting. Not really your brand. Kinda freaks me out.
which direction is up?
i don't have a question, just want some wisdom if you have any to spare
row, row, row your boat (gently, down the stream)... merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily (life is but a dream)
What movie should I watch tonight?
UHF
Why are you answering questions?
why are you asking them?
By the way, there's a lot of research about narcissists and empaths and their toxic codependency. You should read it.
thanks for this (and the other fifteen messages along these lines that i've been sent in the past few hours)... i hear what is being said and i have edited my answer to a previous question... i have nothing more to say on the topic and continue to wish all people well on their own path towards freedom and peace
I'm thinking of a number between one and ten. What number am I think of?
*
why did you decide on tiktok as the new platform of creative choice and what do you hope comes of it
just seems like a solid exhaust pipe, plus it reminds me of vine (except the bots are way more encouraging)
I HOPE YOU DIE IN A FIRE YOU SELFISH MAN HATING WHORE
over 3,000 people die in a fire just in the united states every year, so you may very well get your wish
Give me a plan for the day.
take a long walk in the rain
yooooooooooo you coming to raid up on area fitty won or wut?
the real area 51 was in our hearts all along
What's in my sandwich?
ham and cheese
Follow up to my previous question: how do you think either of them or any other person should handle things going forward after the #metoo movement? It seems unfair to just say that we should throw people away completely. Or should we? I don't really know. I don't think anyone knows? But we need to figure this out, don't you think? You seem to be obsessed with empathy, so don't you have any empathy for them? What would you do in their shoes?
according to most folks (who slam me with upset private messages every time i address this subject), i have far too much empathy regarding this topic and my tendencies towards restorative justice make everything worse for everyone... and i am reminded that of all the philosophies throughout history, the words that seem to provoke the most confusion and outrage when actually put into practice are these: 'love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which spitefully use you and persecute you'... despite the heart-breaking knowledge that such a philosophy leads to one's own crucifixion, i will continue to walk that path
Do you see any difference between Louis CK and Aziz Ansari and if so what and if not why not?
they both got a wake up call, but i suspect that only one of them woke up
How do I become legendary?
die
I notice a big gap from summer of last year until spring of this year on the page. What was going on then and why didn't you post anything?
this page is to analyze and report on and experiment with data... but that also means that from time to time i'm gonna have to go out and gather some more data
Is Amazing Grace your favorite hymn and if not what is it? Why?
this one seems to follow me wherever i go
nice website
thank you
Why did you stop posting on the play page?
had to send my brain in for a routine oil change and while they were in there, they found a leak in my heart valve... should be out of the shop in a few days as long as all the parts come in on time
Are you okay?
are you?
damn girl, you can belt!!!
when i was married, i didn't allow any belts in our house or cars or anywhere near me, so my husband had to keep them at his office and finish getting dressed at work
Are you done collecting people? Are you now just collecting yourself?
i think that perhaps collecting people is how i collect myself... but finding a balance between consuming and assimilating and rejecting and changing is key and i'm still working on that (and probably always will be)
Just went through your whole website. It took me longer than I thought it would. Also I didn't even know Harry Anderson had died. Or maybe I thought he was already dead? Half the time someone is trending on Twitter, I don't know if we're celebrating their birthday or the anniversary of their death or if they just died. Anyway I had fun and now I have like ten more sites to dig through. Your site is like a portal to other portals. Thanks for making it!!!
sometimes i wonder... with the advent of recording technology, will anyone ever die?
Best thing about rabbit holes?
Easter eggs
What's the best thing about internet friends? What's the worst thing about internet friends?
distance
I found you from Jacob Collier's Make Me Cry video. Do you work for Pixar?
pixar works for me
That video on your Revolt page with the song about "family" should have a trigger warning on it. That's not okay and it is extremely disturbing. I hope your friend has a therapist. I'm serious. I'm not trying to be flippant. I don't think he's a safe person for you to be in contact with. I'm sure he's lovely at times, but he doesn't seem well. I don't think you're going to listen to me, but I'm going to tell you what I think anyway. You play with fire and it always turns out really badly and I'm not saying it's your fault, but I am saying (as always) that it's not your job to fix broken men and I wish you would realize that for longer than five minutes at a time. Grace. Listen to me. Please. I love you.
there's so much i could say here, but let's just start with the fact that one out of every nine women that you see every day in every room you enter has experienced childhood sexual abuse at the hands of a trusted adult (and 80% of sexual abuse perpetrators are parents)... there are far more traumatized people walking around in the world than you may realize and to suggest that anyone who even discusses such a thing in a piece of art is automatically 'broken' or 'unsafe' is a huge huge huge huge part of the problem of why people don't talk about this stuff and why it festers and the cycle continues... and i can think of few better therapeutic ways of coping than by making art/music/theater/etc with those feelings, despite how uncomfortable it may make others... that type of creative effort isn't for everyone, but is does let survivors know that they are not alone when handling these types of experiences... and honestly, i'm happy that you don't understand that... i hope someday to live in a world where no one will have to understand that... lastly, be very careful about reading too much into people's creative work... sometimes there is a big difference between what's in front of the curtain and what's behind it (for better and for worse)
What if I never find what I'm looking for? Lots of people don't.
hopefully you'll have had fun looking
What's one thing you think I need to work on to become a happier person?
i have no idea who's asking, but generally speaking, all of us can always work on gratitude
DIE IN A FIRE BITCH CUNT
hit 'friend', cabin cutie (#anagram)
How many partners do you have?
calculating
Please tell me that Matt Farley is going to make a podcast responding to your response to his podcast.
hahahaha, holy shit... we could really keep this going forever
so If you quit your job does that mean you're not working at all anymore? How will you pay for stuff? how do people just quit jobs?? I mean I would like to quit my job too but I have responsibilities.
i'm currently doing tour assistance for a friend and then when that's wrapped up, i'll be starting a new position doing grants/contracts work for the jazz dept at my local HBCU
What is this?
an intensive care unit
Who are you?
a gas station attendant
LOL! Nardwuar
doot doo
I swear to god i hear a telephone ringing or something in the end of the Most Threatening song. Is there a telephone ringing or am I insane???
i hear that too, but i honestly have no idea where it's coming from... there's also the faint sound of a bell almost like a trolley dinging noise at the end of another one that happened as a train was going by outside
Greetings! I am your long lost great great great great grandperson from another dimension and I need you to choose for me the infinite earth spirit whom I shall partner with for all of space and time. They must be the apex of all living persons of your universe. One who can carry me through the portholes of the unknown and slay the dragons of yesterday and tomorrow and save all the peoples of my planet. Who shall you choose for me? I will understand if this takes you many decades to contemplate, but I'd like the answer by Friday. Thanks!
that's the easiest question i've received so far!!! (and you better be the apex of all living things in the entire multiverse because no one other than that could ever be worthy of partnering with the infinitely beautiful blessing that is the nard)
I AM GOING TO DESTROY YOU
sounds like a fun challenge! godspeed
Best part of your past 8 hours?
i took a walk barefoot in the rain
Ask me a question.
why?
GODDAMMMIT i thought u were hot in a libraryan way and then but you have a kid ?? and it killed my boner BIGTIME sorry not gonna raise someone spawn but u still cute
oh no, i will mourn this great loss throughout all of eternity
Does your dad approve of this website?
my dad is dead... and if he were alive, he'd be 80 years old and would certainly have no idea how to use a computer
You get permission to sing over other people's tracks?
no, but (so far) everyone i've mixed with has heard and approved of the tracks before i posted and i always have (and always will) link/credit other people if they are involved in the post
Have you ever told someone you loved them and then changed your mind?
no
Got future plans?
future plans got me
The advertisement in the middle of the rainbow song post on the laugh page actually scared me! I wasn't expecting it at all. But then when it jumped back to the song I started laughing. And then I went out and bought some five hour energy!!! The commercial worked! Maybe I'm going to win a vacation! If so I'm taking you with me
i've never purchased or consumed that product (and probably never will) and it infuriated me when it popped up randomly in the middle of the performance, but i will say that it DID water the seed that i needed to quit my job, so i'm oddly grateful that it popped up
gg;gns:GSDGGSDg g jgs'sj h' j'j s's 's jk'S"zgl;ndhfdjs jDG J"f jfjj g Knlg slgkNSd/glkSdg lzs sgh 'Sgs 'kGSDkG LSdgjnx.jvZN/lskbz;dl igkS g hj gdsfj eo;8awhp eo83uihp ;oet ayli srkjz/lhkjzsriw4ylIE
could have used a few more numbers, but i'll take it
You just laughed. What caused it.
i can't remember, but maybe this? i think?
What if I make the wrong choice?
make a new choice! if that one's wrong... make a new choice! if that one's wrong... i think you see where i'm going with this
What's something you used to love that you don't have anymore?
my mom used to collect fiber optic music boxes... i loved those so much... wow... THANK YOU for this question, because i hadn't thought about those for decades and it just gave me the most amazing amazing amazing warm feelings
Who is that guy on the June 2nd video?
my son's uncle
Who are you taking to France with you?
everyone
FUCK YOU SELF RIGHTOUS BITCH
excellent suggestion... i fucked myself this morning and it was glorious... might do it again later, will keep you posted
What drum sampler were you using on The Most Threatening THing?
those were my roommate's chopsticks on our kitchen counter
The "One Day" song made me cry. I don't know why.
good tears, i hope!
Do you think your time at CRS was a waste?
absolutely not!!! i met some cool people, i was in a local TV commercial, and i learned a HUGE spiritual lesson... in order to truly repair something that's been through a disaster, you often have to do additional demolition first... more demolition seems counter-intuitive to repairing something, but you have to do it to ensure that you've dried out every nook and cranny inside of the walls and underneath the subfloors... if you try to build something new straight away, it will only cover up eventual rot and mold
Fuck. You quit. I knew that was gonna happen. You're already missed.
“often when you think you're at the end of something, you're at the beginning of something else" -- fred rogers
prison is a great way to put it - so proud of you for doing what makes you happy and for not doing what doesn't. and for recognizing people's bullshit. how do you do it without worrying about what happens next
a long time ago, i answered a question about the difference between belief and faith... you should check that out... also, i will say that bravery isn't a lack of crippling fear, it's the ability to do the right thing despite the crippling fear
What did you think of Sexy Fetus?
i was literally screaming in joy... i set that ball up and expected him to tap it over the net, but he fucking spiked the shit out of that ball and i was so proud of him... it will become more difficult to be free with the always-encroaching corporate overlord vultures surrounding, but even if for just that moment, i got to watch him frolic in freedom and it was an absolute privilege to watch
My boyfriend and I cannot get "Shame on You Grace" out of our heads. Total bop.
thank you
Did you give up on this page?
no, but i was getting a number of submissions that were clearly from my office, so i needed to hold off a minute until i took care of a few things there
Are you worried about being fired?
hell no
OH MY GOD I LOVED SEXY FETUS HAHAHAHAHAHAHH YOU FUCKING MAD LADS
the playing field is always more vast than you think, isn't it?
Hey. That thing you made with that pervert about sexy fetuses is disgusting. Shame on both of you. What is wrong with you people? Being shocking doesn't make you better or cooler. It's low brow and beneath what you're capable of. You both need Jesus.
with all due respect to your opinion, i thought it was one of the most beautiful 21st century parables of all time... the fetus is the infinitely magnetic creative spark/idea/energy and murderous Greg is the corporate/label/executive that wants to steal, alter, and destroy it... is that not what you got out of it?
Anonymous coworker here. The admin on call song is fucking hilarious. You're cool. And this place is going downhill fast. That giant TV with all the revenue numbers and shit on it is making everyone insane. We aren't "Compassionate people dedicating to help" or whatever. It's always about making the most money and I'm tired of trying to compete to take advantage of people in crissis.
thank you and you're right and i'm sorry... seeing the direction of things the past month or so has broken my heart
Follow up to my other last question. Do you believe in signs?
signs believe in me
Follow up to my last question. Do you park next to any new signs now?
yes
I feel like the story of that building explosion from your haiku page totally just got lost in the story pile. What happened there? Is it being rebuilt? And you parked under that sign every day before it blew up? That's insane. Can you give us any more story there?
it's still just a giant pile of rubble as far as i know... i'm sure eventually they'll rebuild something, but it will probably take a long time... i will say that the 'prescient' sign is still there on the only remaining wall
Holy shit GRACE! What if your bosses hear that jingle?
i'll find out that they have a sense of humor or i'll find out that what i'm saying isn't actually a joke and they'll freak out on me... should be educational either way!
Why do you like playing and making things with other people?
it's fun to play catch with people you love... and the results can be pretty amazing
can't find Trench playing Hey Jude on YouTube anywhere . link?
it's not on YouTube
I didn't know you played the flute! Sounds pretty! <3
besides this month, i hadn't played since 2013ish
Are you still in touch with Matt Farley or was that phone call a one off thing?
we're workout buddies
The post you made where you were screaming in all caps at your self was scary. Do you always talk 2 yourself like that?
no, i'm not sure i've ever written out anything like that towards myself or anyone else... i haven't looked at it since i wrote it, but i'm sure that i was harder on myself than necessary, but sometimes you gotta be disciplined and if there isn't someone around to discipline you, you'll have to do the job yourself
You are so impressive and I hope you don't let the nuances knock you down. Some of us hope you knock down the others.
i'd prefer that no one ever gets knocked down, but i've come to realize that someone getting knocked up, down, or sideways in reaction to my presence is based on what they're bringing to the table... i'm just holding up a mirror while exploring the world... we'll see what happens along the way
Sometimes you hide things in periods and stuff on your page. Like I can click on little dots and get taken to bonus stuff. I just wanted you to know I found some of those and that made me feel cool. Why do you do that?
i think you may have answered your own question
The converation between you and 20000 songs guy was really cool.
thank you
teach me a lesson. tell me who i really am. don't hold back.
the Connection is working, but sometimes there's a bit of a delay between what we hear and what we see... but it's okay... through a bit of testing with some trusted friends, everything will eventually sync up quite nicely, right on time
What do your prayers be like?
thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you please don't give up on me yet thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you
TEST
you passed!
How should I deal with feeling so restless?
rest less
Are all creative people just insane?
outsane
What is a muse?
a fuse
YOUR WEBSITE FUCKING SUCKS ON MY PHONE AND PROBABLY ANY PHONE. Seriously the videos sometimes don't play because the files are huge and everything is tiny on this page and it is infuriating to try to navigate. Please fix this. Most people visit websites on their phones, so having a website that is so unusable on a phone is probably defeating the purpose of you having a website at all. Why bother putting out a product if you're not going to put in the effort to make sure it isn't the best it could be?
not everything in your life is going to be worth the investment of your time and effort... only you can decide if the amount of work this website requires for you is worth your investment
How do you think you make people feel when they meet you? Do you actively try to make everyone you meet feel good?
i think my unflinching honesty and vulnerability sometimes unintentionally makes other people feel naked... how they feel about being naked probably depends on a lot of things outside of my control, but i always do my best to treat anyone's nakedness with the greatest possible reverence, honor, respect, compassion and love
I listened to that Conan story and thought it was really cool and not crazy so tell me another celebrity story like that!
last summer when i was feeling particularly lost, i was walking through downtown Durham and i saw a homeless man in a wheelchair holding a sign asking for help and i walked up to him, fell on my knees and asked him if he would hold me and pray for me... he did and we both just laid crumbled together on the sidewalk crying in each other's arms for a long time
What's the best thread count? I'm at the store buying sheets and I'm not sure which ones to get. Figured you could help. Thanks.
go with 1 infinitely long thread
When is the last time you laughed? When is the last time you cried? When is the last time you made love? When is the last time you felt ashamed? When is the last time you felt proud? When is the last time you went on an adventure?
looks like someone located my daily to-do list
Why don't you want to be famous?
i don't need the world to know who i am... i just need you to know
Do you believe in polyamory?
polyamory believes in me
answer the question i haven't asked
i will try
is ur pussy shaved
is yours?
Are you a man hater?
hell no... i love men so much that i created a brand new one!
I AM SO PISSED OFF AND DISAPPOINTED RIGHTNOW FUCK
talk/vent to a trusted friend... if you can't do that (or even if you can), write it out and maybe even post it somewhere online
Why didn't you become a teacher? I thought that was what you were going to do when you left Duke?
i got a job offer and talked it over with my son and he veto'd it... i always discuss any big decision that affects him and if he's not 100% on board, then neither am i
Do you still love the one who got away?
i am the one who got away
What kind of phone do you have?
iPhone SE
When's France?
August
How's the baseball game going?
rain delay
Do you ever get depression? If so, have you ever taken medication for it? I'm thinking about trying zoloft.
after i gave birth (2009) and after my divorce was final (2013), my brain chemicals were waaaay out of whack and i took prozac for a little while and i'm sure it saved my life both times... i don't have any experience with any other depression-related medication and i imagine that different meds affect different people different ways, so i can only speak to my own experience... your results may vary
Would you ever date a disabled person or would you be too embarrassed because I think if I dated a non disabled girl people would think it was weird and she would leave. There aren't many mixed ability couples in the world but I don't want to feel like I have to date another disabled person just because I am disabled. Do you have any advice about this?
i don't know if you live in a small town or whatnot, but more diverse places will have lots of unique pairings of folks. i dated an amputee a couple of years ago and people would invariably ask completely inappropriate questions ("are you his nurse?" "how do you have sex?") and i would tell them that the way he ended up in the wheelchair is that i fucked his legs off... if someone tries to embarrass you or your partner, both of you should just mirror that bullshit right back and then keep moving forward
Do you remember every question that's been asked so far?
no
Are you scared of spiders?
no
Did you really blow bubbles on people in a church service? Did anyone get upset and tell you to stop?
i blew bubbles and let the wind decide where they needed to go... afterwards, a number of people thanked me
Do you have a best frieND and how long thave you known theM?
i have three best friends and i met one in 1994, one in 2006, and one in 2012
How do I get to the VIP area of this club?
through the service entrance
what's a good way to avoid answering a question?
what do you think is a good way to avoid answering a question?
What's the difference between being a private investigator and being a stalker?
payment
I need to file a complaint against the better business bureau.
contact the better better business bureau
Why do you want to be "great adjacent" and not just great yourself?
why do physicians want to be sick-adjacent and not just sick themselves?
What's in this bag?
school supplies
Tell me a story about pickles.
nicholas megalis once sang an improvised jingle about a pickle in a bag at the convenience store and it's been in my head for over six years
What's the forecast?
warm and getting warmer
Do you believe in Jesus?
jesus believes in me
are u a nasty filthy dirty WHORE
no, but i play one on tv
How do you come up with the words you label things with on this site? And how did you decide on Mr. Rogers, Trench, Bill Wurtz, and Marc Rebillet as people to highlight specifically? Are they friends or are they just your favorite artists or is it something else?
the words are the action/command that i most associate with the content that it links to
What would you do if someone you knew like an enemy called your job for a disaster help?
that's already happened
Why don't you answer my questions?
i may have answered them earlier in the list
I think it would be cool if when you click on knock it make a knock knock noise
that would be cool... although, if i had the time, the first improvement i would make to this site is to not link out to anything ever and host everything in-house so that i don't have to worry about things being taken down off youtube or news article paywalls, etc.
Do you believe in heaven?
heaven believes in me
What is a goal you're currently working on?
physical health
Hey
hi
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCKFTUKCJGISUHJSDDNSLAEJGHSUGLKJDGFA
bless you
When do you decide to update this questions page?
this is not a questions page and i usually update when i have at least five submissions that i feel i'd like to post and/or respond to
Do you dare to be great?
great-adjacent
Why won't you answer any of my questions about [redacted]?
as a general rule, i don't talk about specific people... i think i did a bit early on and realize now that's probably a really really bad idea... but if you're the same person who's asked about one person in particular, i'll say that i think the difference between us is basically the difference between Conan O'Brien and Chris Gethard
Est-ce que tu vas apprendre le français?
peut-être un peu
Give me a good metaphor for recovery.
okay
i was just in my room and it was really cold and i was just laying there thining about how cold it was and then i realied that i was basically staring at a heater the whole time so then i turned it on and now I'm warming right uip
it really do be like that sometimes
Who are you laughing at?
myself, usually
You have a lot of walls.
and windows
How was your day?
better than yesterday, not as good as tomorrow
I got a new haircut. Do you like it?
yes
Happy Mothers Day! You are the most emotionally connected, most peaceful, most joyful, most confident mom I've ever known in my entire life and it shows in the independent, compassionate, thoughtful, creative man that Joe is becoming. Hope you guys have a wonderful day!
thank you
Why don't you share more of your music here or elsewhere online? You seem to share everything else so why not that?
probably for the same reason that i do not currently choose to make sweet, slow, passionate, unifying, transcendent, life-affirming, mind-blowing love to myself or anyone else in aisle nine of the local grocery store
Even though you don't post everything that's submitted here do you still keep a record of all of the submissions somewhere?
yes
Tell me the best song you've heard recently.
it's a new one whose chorus arrived in my head just this morning
What is the ultimate purpose of this website project?
what is the ultimate purpose of a cookbook?
HOW BIG IS YOUR DICK
same size as yours, i imagine
What are your wants and desires?
to afflict you when you're comfortable and to comfort you when you're afflicted
do you have a favorite bible verse
"love yourself, love others, be honest, stay curious, keep growing" -- Me 1:43
That metaphor ended pretty sadly. Is there not recovery from trauma? Surely you don't just wander in a dark underground maze forever?
the question didn't ask about recovery... and the fact that you used the word 'trauma' suggests that you may already know that some people don't get to the recovery part... they just wander around hitting the few people they run into with shovels out of (understandable) fear... that's the generational trauma cycle, is it not?
Do you write for or work freelance for Dictionary.com? Why do you use them here?
no... it's just used for randomized inspiration
What's the secret of the universe?
secrets
What's new?
now
What's the best part about your new job?
new friends
What was being raped like?
i don't use that word and i'm still not sure it completely fits in my particular case (although the definition of that word seems to change by the minute recently) and i don't think we have a lot of the right words for a lot of experiences in this life, especially sexual ones... and i don't know why you would ask this kind of question, but let me try to answer the question anyway... it's like standing in line with a whole bunch of people and you don't even know what you're standing in line for, but every woman you know is in line and a bunch of dudes too, so you stand there, and then when you finally get to the front of the line, a huge giant punches you as hard as they can right in the face... so you stumble away from the line and you don't know what to do, and blood is dripping down your eyes and pooling in your mouth and through the blood and the tears, you scream "HEY WATCH OUT SOMEONE IS GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE FACE AT THE END OF THIS LINE" and everyone is like "shit", but they also have been standing in line their whole life and don't really know what to do, so they're just kind of wandering around and the giant that's punching people in the face is somewhere out there wandering around in the group too and all of it is terrifying as fuck, and at this point there's so much blood in your eyes that you can't even really see, so you feel around and finally get your hands on a shovel and you just start digging a hole and you don't even know where it's going, but you're just going to keep digging because it feels safer the further down that you dig and then you tunnel far enough down that you somehow run into someone else tunneling and then both of you look at each other in terror and try to be the first to hit the other one with a shovel
I'd never heard of Rachel Held Evans until she passed away, but she seems really amazing. Just wanted to say that.
<3
Are you ready for France? I'm so excited for you!
it's still about 90 days away... although i'm almost at 90 days at my new job and those flew by, so...
So sorry about RHE. I keep checking your honor page.
yeah, i will write a proper post eventually... i think i just need some time on that one
Please help. My poop smells like my dog. What does it mean?
it's time to wash your dog
do you know who is asking this questions
you
Do you ever talk to yourself?
i have written letters to myself for many years
What's your favorite color?
rainbow
Where do we go when we die?
birth
Are you a child of divorce?
no
What was the last text you sent and who did you send it to?
'hell yeeeeeeah' and it was sent to a friend who said they were bringing potatoes to cinco de mayo potluck brunch
Why are you proud of me?
because you're trying
Let's go to the park and rent one of those boats you power with your feet like a bike.
that sounds nice
ngn;fn;sdfbf;bfbf;bf;bf;sbLbfa;sjbna;sobn;Sbn:Snb;sodbn:Sjbn;sjfnbdkjdvkjsaFJSHfjgso;lfknbkhsdblAKejsrhn;urhjalkweuhbdvalisurhnalwekauhd;oslrjngalskuahbejliwetnPQI3GIW4RAJEIL
seems legit
Who is going to win the next presidential election?
someone that disappoints at least half of the population
Is it unethical to pursue a relationship at work?
relationships at work are already baked in... you don't really need to pursue them
What do you want to be when you grow up?
free
Where have all the cowboys gone?
dallas
How many questions have you answered on this page?
i have no idea
Do you answer everything that's asked here?
no
Are you single?
are you?
Do you want to be famous?
on the whole of my life, i hope i've made more of a positive impact than a negative one
I'm starting college in the fall. What should I study?
bubbles
I think it's pretty cool that you're so connected into local politics. Do you seriously plan to run for office?
no
What's harder: being honest with yourself or being honest with someone else?
doing both at the same time, i guess
Are you into guys or girls?
i'm into you
Give me some good advice
okay
Did you get what you wanted for your birthday?
it arrived about six months late, but yes
Wow. You're very weird and it's very, very cute. I'm so glad you came along.
thank you
What is this?
whatever you want it to be
What do you think of the TU reorganization?
sometimes instead of pulling jenga pieces out one at a time, i like to drop kick the whole thing across the room, so i totally get it
??? are you done with this questions and answers page
this is not a questions and answers page... this is a training ground for asking, seeking, and knocking... sometimes it might mean asking a question and sometimes it might mean just making the effort to knock on the door and find out what happens next
Oh shit HAIKUS YES! Are you going to port over all your previously publshed ones??
no
Do you think you'll ever edit this Q&A section? Do you ever worry about regretting something you said or someone taking something you said a long time ago out of context?
i doubt it
WELCOME BACK! I mean, you never really left, but you set this project aside and I thought you might never pick it back up and I really liked it.
thanks
What's the difference between mercy and grace?
mercy is when you don't get something bad that you deserve and grace is when you get something good that you don't deserve
Two roads diverge in a wood. Which one is the one less traveled?
where we're going, we don't need roads <blasts off into the sky and that makes all the difference>
You seem like the kind of person who still has a VCR.
you are correct
Is faith and belief the same thing? Can I have belief in general without saying I have faith? Like if I'm spiritual but not religious?
belief says if it ever goes skydiving someday, the parachute will definitely open... faith jumped out of the plane while we were discussing the question and i'm not even sure it had a parachute on
I think I'm in love. What do I do now?
love
You've been reposting a lot of things here, but not creating much original content... at least not for the past year or so. What gives? I used to see a lot more art, music, poetry, etc from you.
if god can rest on day seven, so can i
How do I fall out of love with someone?
fall in love with someone else?
I'm about to start my senior year of college and I want my boyfriend to ask me to marry him before we graduate. How can I make that happen?
sounds like you should be the one to propose
What are you doing for your birthday?
working at a job i love, i hope
How much water have you consumed today?
not enough... thanks for the reminder!
Which US cities do you enjoy the most, and why?
honestly, other than the terrain/scenery being different, they all feel pretty much the same to me... that said, i enjoy going anywhere i haven't been before... i consider LA/NYC to be 'television towns' and nashville/memphis 'music towns', so those four spots hold a special place in my heart, because i love making television/music and being around those who do... i haven't been to my 'art towns' (portland/austin) yet, so those are probably next on the list for visits
I miss you updating this website every day. :(
i count updating any instagram feeds and the spotify journal as updating the website
Blink once if you won a car. Blink twice if you won money. Blink three times if you won Rice-a-Roni.
i went on the price is right. i had a great time. the episode will air 9/26/18.
What's the longest amount of time you've gone without sexual intercourse?
22 years
Are you in love?
i try to be in/on/under/over/around/through love as much/often as possible
How many ex-partners do you have? Is it more or less than 10?
yes
Do you play Fortnite?
no, but birdie does (when under direct supervision)... it's actually the first time i've allowed him to play any game involving guns and i made him sit through about twelve thousand lectures about the seriousness of real life weaponry / war ... but Fortnite is pretty cartoon-y and i told birdie we're going to pretend like it's a paintball game... and i also feel like it's important to walk him through cultural phenomenon rather than unilaterally ban him from everything i might personally find problematic in some way
What cereal would you most like to eat right now?
product 19, because it doesn't exist anymore and it was my favorite
I love that you decided to take a giant trip during Mercury Retrograde. Zero fucks given.
i barely know what that means, but i will say that my mom's phone got lost in the ocean and i kicked my laptop off my bed accidentally and one of the places i stayed at during the trip charged me twice, so i need to get that straightened out... but i've got too much adventuring to do to let planet positioning grind things to a halt
How many television shows have you written for or been on? Is it more or less than 10?
yes
I got stunk by a jelly fish :(
somewhere, there is a jellyfish telling their friends that they narrowly escaped death from a giant during a home invasion
Have you ever said I love you and then regretted saying it or wished you could go back and unsay it?
no
Is Wayne Brady as sexy in real life as he seems to be? I just missed being able to see him during his run on Hamilton in Chicago. *weeps*
i did not attend any tapings of lets make a deal... will be able to explain why in a few weeks
When is the last time that you cried and why did you cry?
i got a little teary yesterday while eating dinner because i missed birdie
DID YOU WIN EVERYTHING ON THE PRICE IS RIGHT TELL ME I NEED TO KNOW AHHHHHH
i went to the price is right. i had a great time. the episode will air 9/26/18.
When do you get back to Carolina?
sunday night or monday afternoon is the plan right now
How is California?
warm
Have you ever been overseas?
not yet
Do you wear jewelry? Why or why not?
no... i'm allergic to a lot of metals and i'm a bit of a cheap plain jane, i guess... when i was married, i just had a simple gold band... i think i got it at kohls with a gift card from christmas, if i remember correctly
Why do you have this website?
it's a complex multimedia diary/scrapbook, which is what my facebook was until it started being used as a tool to bombard me with advertising, fake news, and general upset
Do you know how to play chess?
no
What do you want to win on The Price is Right?
the opportunity to spread love and hope to millions of people who might need it the most
Is your passport up to date?
not yet
Is Phoenix and/or Birdie on the trip?
Phoenix, yes... Birdie, no (he's on the second of two summer vacations with dad)
Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?
on a secluded holiday with waldo, i hope
How's the trip? Can we follow along? PUUHHHLLLLLEEEEEEASSSE?!
i'll make up a new instagram account tonight and post the link on the home page before i leave in the morning
What is something you learned this week?
it's less of something i learned and more of something i was reminded of: i had a race with Birdie on a concrete path and accidentally tripped on my own feet and went tumbling down, skinning my palms/knees/elbows and HOLY HELL it still hurts really badly after like 48 hours despite tons of ointment and bandage changes... so, i am reminded that being a kid is really tough and when little ones cry because of skinned knees and whatnot, they really mean it! poor little sweethearts! my empathy for boo-boos is at an all-time high
Boys are terrible
some humans are pretty broken, for sure... and then again, some humans are awesome! it's a bag of mixed nuts for sure, but in the long arc of history, things are actually getting better all the time, i promise
Phoebe Fiat is going on a huge adventure! I bet she really zips around the mountains, yeah?
that's true... but actually, my friend Vinny's car broke down today, so i gave him mine to use while i'm gone and i rented a car for my adventure instead... looks like i'll be travelling the country in a mazda3 with massachusetts plates! guess i gotta work on my boston accent... i rented a caaaaah... how's that? ;)
I want a helper. How do I get a helper?
give up a rib
Why is birth so painful?
so you'll have an unshakable investment in the end product
I'm having a baby this fall. What advice can you give me?
sing prince's 'i would die 4 u', but change the lyrics to 'i will diaper you' whenever it is time for a change
What's the difference between a chrysalis and a cocoon?
chrysalis is a defunct british record label and cocoon is the sixth highest-grossing film of 1985
What is the best album to put on while I sex my girl
uh... well... logic's 'everybody' album fucked me real good recently, so... i guess maybe just give her that and leave the room for an hour or so and see how that goes
Have you ever been to California before or will this be your first time?
first time
why am i so hateful and scared of what i dream of?
you tell me
How's the road trip going so far?
i'm not leaving for cali until wed... although i am making a quick trip to artscape baltimore sunday to finally get to see tony's film (and hopefully bo's too!) so if you're in the DMV area, feel free to meet up
What's something that you love more today than you did a year ago?
rain
Sometimes I think I don't have enough fight in me to succeed in this world. I don't want to trample anyone to get ahead. I want everyone to win.
same... hey, let's compete about who is more non-competitive! (although, fair warning... you should take the draw)
What movie should I watch today?
the one that inspires you to make your own movie
I was supposed to go to a karaoke party tonight, but instead I got diarrhea and stayed home. I hope your day was more productive than mine.
it sounds like your day was very productive, just not the way you anticipated... drink some water and take a walk... there will be more parties
What's the last thing that made you really frustrated and how did you deal with it?
i was watching a clip of Colbert and an ad started in the middle of it and when i clicked onto a new tab to work on something else while the commercial was running, the ad stopped... it would only play if i kept the tab open and looked at the screen... felt like a hostage situation, so i closed my browser entirely and made some kind of light growling noise and worked on something else instead
everyone is old as fuck at this nude beach
you must be in new jersey
Yellow or Blue?
green
Why didn't you finish your graduate degree?
i decided to help someone else do theirs first
When you say you love people, i Think you mean more like you care about them.. Shouldnt the word "love" be reserved only for certain really special people ? Otherwise it loses impact i think.
love's impact is infinite, therefore it cannot be lost or lessened no matter how widely it is distributed
I LOVE YOU, GRACIE!!!! I CAN'T WAIT TO HUG YOUR FAAAAACE AGAAAAAAAIN SOOOON!!!!!
i love you, too
What are you afraid of?
it's usually a tie between nothing and everything
You have a lot of yourself online. Aren't you afraid of stalkers?
no
Thoughts on ghosting? Have you ever ghosted someone or been ghosted by someone? It seems like it's happening more than ever with Tinder and whatnot.
super super super cowardly, but i understand why people do it... i've never done it and i've never had it done to me, but i'm also an insane person who says everything i'm thinking the moment i think it and seems to be allergic to running away from difficult conversations... also, i'm sure this isn't a new thing, it just used to be called 'standing someone up' or 'being stood up' and it probably happened even more back in the day, because it was surely easier to disappear before social media / mobile technology
There's a guy that has a thing for me, but I'm not into him. I don't want to hurt his feelings, but I don't want to be an asshole either and just like shut him down before he's even said anything. Any advice? Should I just block him and run? We only have like two mutual friends and I could probably avoid him if I really try.
casually mention being gay or being taken, even if those things aren't true? that's probably terrible advice, but it's usually pretty effective... whatever you do, don't take your time on this and hope it just goes away on its own, because the longer you go without putting your foot down, the worse it's going to get for the both of you, i promise
Are you happy?
happiness is a road, not a destination
What's your favorite thing about your life?
that i can lose my marbles and disappear for a few months every few years and when i come back around, my friends are always just as supportive and excited to see me as ever
Will you ever tell us about you and Trench? That was always my favorite part of Vine. #imissvinesomuch
i doubt it, because a story involving someone else can only be told with the permission of the other person and trench is (obviously) a very private person and i would never betray someone's trust like that... although, i've told other great vine-related stories before, so perhaps you can just live off one of those instead (if you don't have facebook, then make a dummy login, i guess? i thought about trying to move over a decade of work to this site and then realized that's a lost cause when i've got so much more shit to do... i'z sowwy)
Does no always mean no?
no, but you should act as if it does anyway to be on the safe side and let the other person figure out how/when to be honest and say yes if that's what they really want to say, because if you're wrong and they really do mean 'no' and you force a yes, you could cause immeasurable harm to the both of you
What's the last text you got and who was it from?
'i'm outside guasaca' from a friend meeting me for lunch
When is it a good idea to give up on a crush going somewhere?
i've never had a crush who i didn't express my feelings to... sometimes those feelings are reciprocated and sometimes they are not... so i think that step one needs to be expressing your feelings to the person and step two has to be respecting the person's feelings in response... if someone does not reciprocate your feelings, try not to think of it as you need to 'give up' and perhaps think of it instead as you need to 'respect the person you love'... and also, it might be useful to keep in mind that there are many different types of love and many ways to love someone
Is it foolish to dream? Doesn't that just set you up for disappointment?
to the contrary, i think it's more fun to always attempt the impossible, because then when you fail, it's expected and not as disappointing... and if you succeed, well then you accomplished the impossible, didn't you? and how great is that??
How many toilets do you have in your house?
three
I'm going through a really bad breakup. I want to pretend like it was mutual, but it wasn't. I feel like my entire sense of reality is irreparably fucked now and I'm collapsing in on myself like a dying star. Is this going to get any better? I know you're going to say it will, because that's what everyone says, but do you have any real concrete ideas on how to get through this? Please don't say, "It takes time."
romantic love is the ultimate tunnel vision, which is beautiful when you're in the tunnel with your partner and horrifying when you find yourself in the tunnel alone... so your top priority right now has to be the struggle to make your way out of the tunnel... go on some journeys to new places to help get yourself out of your current daily rhythm and if one journey isn't enough, go on another one that's twice as long... keep doing it until you're out of the tunnel... you'll get there a little more every day, i promise
Why does God let bad things happen to good people?
why do you?
When is the last time you did a sexy slow dance?
new year's eve, i think
What's something you got in huge trouble for as a kid? How long were you grounded for?
it's... complicated
What is your favorite thing to do on a rainy day?
take a walk
Have you ever done karaoke? What did you perform?
proud mary and super bass come to mind, but i know there are many others
Would you ever skydive?
oh, i think i jumped out of a plane a long time ago
Is @yourfriendgrace you on twitter and if so why dont you use it??
it's not me and i don't know who it is, although i wish i did so i could get that handle! it used to be mine a long time ago, but i deactivated for too long at some point in 2014 (i think?) and lost it
What is your greatest regret?
when i look back, i usually am bummed that i didn't stick up for myself more in certain situations... i'm working on it :)
Should I sign a contract?
that depends on your goals and the conditions of the contract
Do psychologists ever go crazy themselves or do they know so much that they can stop themselves before they lose it?
in my experience, most people who study psychiatry are drawn to it in the first place because they feel the need to diagnose themselves or one of their loved ones
OH CRAP! Are you going on The Price Is Right? Ugh, you are my favorite person ever. Ever ever.
yes, and!
What is your latest obsession?
cramming for finals! :)
I'm so excited about your upcoming trip! What made you decide to finally go for it?
i realized that the only thing stopping me from making my dreams come true is me... as soon as i started planning the trip, everything began falling into place as if the universe was making a huge exhale saying, "FINALLY! we've been waiting for you to be ready for so long"
Uhhhhh, you don't mean like actually kill yourself for love, right?
NO! no no no no no... i mean 'kill' in the same way that we get 'new selves' every seven years or like 'ye must be born again', etc... a suicide of the ego... eek, now i feel like i should edit those, because i probably got way too philosophical on those questions... thanks for asking for a clarifying follow-up! i know i can get a little weird/heady now and again
Do you believe in the whole five love languages thing? Like different people have different ways of communicating and so you should figure out how to love them best based on how they like to be loved? How can you figure that out though? Is it just trial and error?
all learning (especially social learning) is trial and error... but i will say that one method of love that seems to work across the board is figure out what another person's dreams/goals are and then figure out every way you can to support those and/or make those things happen
How do I love?
find something you'd die for and then kill yourself for it
How do I hate?
find something you'd die for and then kill it for yourself
Ummmm hi I kinda stalked ur FB & saw pics of u with ppl from the office! Omfg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOW? I watch that all the dime with my mom do u work pn there or sumthin?
no.
What is bravery? Am I brave? Are you brave?
i was going to say no, but i changed my mind
my paresnts are awful they dont understand me and they hate eah other and they hate me and i just want to get the fuck out of here what shoudl i do
determine your own way to survive and conquer and if you hit a wall, figure out if there's any way to climb over, under, around, or through it... once you've exhausted every possible path, if you still can't get past it, plant some flowers at the wall and know that help is on the way
Will you give me your phone number?
check on the inside of my glasses
Why are you doing this?
our kids need a mom
Did you save up for retirement?
i didn't, but it somehow saved up for me anyway
If you could give me a gift right now, what would you give me?
internal peace/balance
What do you think about music theory? Does knowing more theory make your musical experience better or worse? Should I study it if I want to really appreciate music?
think of music the same way you think about sex... imagine picking it apart in the same way and envision if that would help or not... how much? in what ways? could you enjoy sex without the theory classes? could you learn about it just by doing? what would help more: trial/error/experience or reading about it? but could reading about it still help in some ways?
Is it better to be an optimist a pessimist or a realist?
be the realest surrealist
Are you a jealous person? Have you ever dated a jealous person? Isn't jealousy an inherant human emotion? How to deal with it in yourself and other?
while jealousy is an innate human trait, it is also the enemy of love and, left unchecked, it would certainly cause the inevitable demise of any kind of partnership with me... the goal of loving someone should be to help them be more free... to help their light shine brighter, not snuff it out and/or hoard it
What did you always want to be when you grow up?
a kid
I just moved to a new city and I want to make new friends, but I don't know where I should go. I don't want to go to church, because I'm not sure those are the kinds of friends I want to make, but that's always been my go-to for making new friends in a new town. Any advice on where to go?
an orphanage
What's something that can always make you feel better?
rainbows, forgiveness, expressing my feelings in constructive ways that don't hurt myself or anyone else, solving a complicated puzzle, helping someone else feel better... the answer to this question could be quite lengthy
Any chance there will be a NM stop on the next trip?
guaranteed
How can you say "I love you too" when you don't know who said I love you??
i don't have to know someone to love them... actually, it's usually most effective to do it the other way around
What is the hardest thing in the world and are you going to do it?
mr rogers said the toughest assignment in this life is to 'make goodness attractive' and i'm trying... first to myself and then, if i'm successful in that endeavor, perhaps to you
Should we pay attention to the news?
let the news pay attention to you
What turns you on?
elon musk making a tiny submarine to help rescue the trapped kids in thailand
What's the last thing that made you cry?
elon musk making a tiny submarine to help rescue the trapped kids in thailand
How do I defeat a wolf in sheep's clothing?
be a sheep in wolf's clothing
I love you.
i love you, too
Why are you the way that you are?
because i can?
Wait a minute, you don't believe in soulmates?!?!? That's not very romantic! If you don't believe in things, they can't come true.
i'm not sure i understand what romance is... i kinda only understand what love is in a general way, because it's the most powerful kind for me... today i spent some time with a homeless guy and we just hugged and cried and he prayed for me and it was probably the most romantic thing i could have experienced today, but i also don't really know what that word means, i think... but in that moment, grizzled kind homeless dude was my soulmate and it was great
Is love real or just chemicals?
everything is chemicals
Where's the next adventure? (*cough* austin *cough*)
i'm going on the most ambitious trip of my life from july 25 to aug 6... details will be showcased soon ;)
Have you ever embarass yourself in front like a crush or something and felt you were going to die? Because me.
HAHAHHAHA... every damn day, dear... every damn day... but that just means you're alive and you're trying and that's nothing to be embarrassed about, i promise
You don't know me, but I found you on Reddit and you seem super nice. I don't know why I'm telling you this.
because you feel happy and you want to spread happiness... keep it up!
Why do you delete stuff?
i'm a control freak?
How old are u?
probably old enough to be your mom but not your grandma
AHHHH THAT WAFFLE SANDWICH!! Want!! Is there one of those shops in Nashville???
it's only in DC, sadly... but now i kinda wanna open a waffle sandwich food truck for the triangle! you can open one in nashville, too! where's that person who kept asking me if i figured out my 9 to 5 yet?? maybe they'll invest! ;)
You jumped on a landmine for us, Grace. We won't forget it.
#143
I think your ratio of thinking to doing is slightly out of whack. Little less conversation (in your head) a little more action (outside of it)?
thank you for your input, i have forwarded your suggestion to corporate
Hit me up a platitude but fix it first.
all who wander are lost, but at least they're trying
Just wanted to say I love you and I'm thinking of you today and I'm grateful for everything you've done this year for the women here and around the country (and world)! You are and always will be one of my all time favorite sheros. I know you've pulled back from a lot of things over the past few months, but you deserve the rest. You are one of the strongest people I've ever known and one of the most graceful and fair. Your name really does fit. Thank you, thank you, thank you. You have saved more lives than you will ever know. You are so loved. I hope you really feel that love and support on this independence day and every one to come.
thanks for the kind words... onward, forward, together
What's a good first date idea?
new employee orientation
When is the right time to walk away from a bad relationship or job or church or whatever? How do you ever know when to walk away and when to keep trying?
you don't... you just make a choice and see how it feels and if it feels bad, make a new choice... that said, i tend to keep trying waaaaay past the expiration date, but i'm working on finding the right balance (and so can you)
Still haven't hit the ceiling on that Spotify list, huh?
amazingly, no... and perhaps more amazingly, i'm able to remember all the songs i've used thus far and am still able to think of my days in terms of songs i haven't used yet
Who is the sexiest celebrity?
it's a tie between you and bob newhart
Are you a witch?
probably... on a related note, what is a witch?
Can I plz purchase a sweet smoothe jam that shall be my song of the summer. k thx
hmm... okay, but no refunds
OMGGG THE SEASHARK VIDEO IS TOO ADORABLE AND I AM NOW DEAD RIP ME AHHHH!!!!
i'll tell birdie to put a trigger warning on the next one ;)
Did you go see Mr. Rogers grave?? What was that like?
i did... i didn't feel much, because (for whatever reason), i just don't feel anything when i go to gravesites... but i still felt like it was an important pilgrimage to make and i'm glad i did it... we also went to the fred rogers center in latrobe and saw his sweaters and shoes and the trolley and puppets and even some of his handwritten letters and notes and scripts and whatnot which was really neat
What advice would you give someone feeling suicidal?
first off, recognize that this world is batshit crazy, not you... then go eat your favorite meal, drink some water, and get some sleep... and if you still feel seriously like killing yourself when you wake up, make a list of hilarious/insane (but non-violent) things to do before you go, because you might as well, right? maybe in the midst of running naked through a walmart screaming "i'm a sexy salamander" you might end up having a good enough time to decide to stick around (after you get released from a hospital, i imagine) and if not, then at least you got to fuck with reality one last time... **NOTE: if you're local and you feel this way, just come over and let me squeeze the crazy out of you**
How can I gain more wisdom?
make more mistakes
I'm in summer school and i hve to do a report on a famous historical figure so who should i picK?
sophie scholl
Have you seen the new Mister Rogers doc? I saw a poster for it and thought of you.
yep! twice! and i'll probably go a few more times, too! :)
Any chance you'll be in NYC for DCM this weekend (or are already here!)?
nope, but i'm sending everyone lots of good energy to break all the legs! (and i'm secretly hoping with the change of location next year will come a change of name, because fuck del close)
I feel like I haven't seen you in 700 years. Are you traveling for the whole summer?
no... i should be back in carolina in the next 24 hours and will stay put for at least 2 or 3 weeks... i definitely need to decompress/process after all the recent adventuring
Will the answer to this question be no?
yes and no
Tell me five physical (inanimate) objects that provided you happiness in the past 48 hours.
the most transcendent grilled ham and swiss sandwich on a waffle, whatever cooking machine helped heat/toast said sandwich, the car that transported me to said sandwich, the mall whose food court allowed me to experience said sandwich, this website by which i can alert you to said sandwich
Do you wish you had finished your graduate degree?
no
Do you believe you have a soulmate? Not like in the sense that we are all each other's soulmates, but like the hollywood kind. You know what I mean I think.
no, but i'm open to being proven wrong
What is something that matters a lot to you now that didn't matter to you five years ago?
'enthusiastic consent'... and i wouldn't say it didn't matter to me five years ago, but i think about its importance much more now than i did five years ago... it's easy to steamroll somebody on accident when you're overcome with your own emotions and you've got to be willing to walk yourself back from the ledge if your partner isn't just as willing as you are to jump
Dearest Grace, Tulsa has the Woody Guthrie archives, the Bob Dylan archives, and we're in talks for the Johnny Cash archives. We're also about to have medical marijuana. MOVE HOME.
i'm proud of all the forward steps that oklahoma has taken and continues to take
Are you really proud of me?
really really
Tell me a story about your the best part of your day.
today or just in general? (if we're talking about today, it involved freestyling to this and this with birdie and my bestie in the capitol)
What song are you listening to right now?
theme song to Family Ties
What are you most excited about this week?
lord willin' and the creek don't rise, i'm going to get to pay respects to my spiritual father
First stop on the journey this time?
just singin' some songs with my friends
IMPROV!
no, but yes, and
Are you getting tired of answering questions yet?
no, but are you tired of asking them?
Have you ever experienced multiple personality disorder?
no, but it sounds like a good time and it's on my bucket list
Do you ever give up on people?
no, but sometimes people give up on themselves and there's nothing i can do about that
How do you seem to know what I'm thinking? Are you psychic?
no, but maybe we're just both tuned into the same radio station
Is it better to be single and lonely or married and miserable?
what about single and miserable or married and lonely? (if i were you, i'd choose something outside that four block, but that's just me...)
Are there any characteristic that all your romantic partners past/present share?
bashful confidence and inexhaustible passion about some particular topic, though the topics vary pretty widely (politics, basketball, comedy, physics, music, film-making, blues/swing dancing...)
Are you going to make another picture feed for the upcoming trip? I really liked following along on your last one. :)
probably not... but i'll be sure and share anything special that happens somewhere on this site, i promise
Did you visit your dad's grave while you were in Tulsa? Why or why not?
no... it didn't even occur to me, actually
How can I stop feeling so fucking sad and hopeless and useless all the time?
drink water, take a walk, and help someone else... i know you probably don't even have the energy to get out of bed, but even walking through a grocery store and genuinely complimenting a stranger will help you remember that your existence matters and can brighten someone else's day... and when you say their day brighten, yours will brighten too
Your mom is adorable. That's not a question- I just wanted to put that out there.
she's a sweetheart
U gonna cum 2 hahvahd and fukup sum smaht kidz?!
you know i'm always doing that in spirit
How many waffles have you eaten in the past 24 hours?
no comment
Big spoon or little spoon?
why not fork?
I ALREADY MISS YOU GAAAAAHHHHH COME BAAAAAAACK
i'm already there
What's a constructive way to deal with anger?
music, art, writing, exercise, introspection, problem-solving, delaying actions you might regret until you can calm down... the goal should be to find your own unique way of internal/external deescalation that doesn't hurt yourself or anyone else... and if/when you make a mistake dealing with your anger, apologize and make it right
What do you think is the quality about yourself that helps you the most and what do you think is the quality that hurts you the most?
impulsive honesty
What happened? Did you give up on this website?
of course not! but, remember, this site is a scrapbook and playground to document my adventures... it is not The Adventure (therefore, it is not The Priority)
Where's the next trip?
birdie and i will head out at the end of this week to take a 10 day excursion up/down the northeast corridor... still piecing it together after decompressing from the first summer journey
Why didn't Birdie go on the trip?
he was on vacation with dad
Tell me a story about your mom that isn't online somewhere else already.
over the past year or so, she became friends online with a musician/audio book narrator who lives in tulsa and he was giving a seminar at the library this weekend, so they finally got to meet in 'real life' and he asked her to eat afterward and he said that he's kind of a recluse and never leaves his place much and she said she would help him by editing his stuff and shopping for him and bringing him things so he could 'keep his nose to the grindstone' at his place, and he said that would be great, but he also wants to get out more, so he suggested they meet for food again in the next day or two... to say i am thrilled for her (and for him) would be the understatement of a lifetime #nevertoolatetofly
All I want to do is fill this box up with stupid stuff. What does this mean about me as a person?
that you're having fun
Who's on first?
who
How many 9-volt batteries does it take to change a tire?
the tire cannot be changed unless it wants to change
love?
Love.
what's the biggest difference between you now and you ten years ago?
i am ten times more free than i was ten years ago... and i hope to be ten times more free ten years from now than i am today
I LOVE YOU, GRACIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND I'M PROUD OF YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i love you and i'm proud of you, too <infinite exclamation points>
Where is the line between being merciful/loving and being an enabler?
i have no idea... if you find out, please let me know
What colour is your soul?
rainbow
How can you stay in a car for so long?
it's fun for me... i think i'd probably make a pretty good long haul trucker... maybe i'll do that one day
Dose bacon make good underwear
not for me, but you're free to try it and see if it's right for you
Was Madonna a slut?
i don't know her and i don't know what that word means
Soooo are you coming to Austin then?!?!!?
i won't be coming to austin on this week's trip, but this isn't the only trip i'm taking this summer
What's that smell?
bacon
If you're listening to music right now (and you always are) then what song is playing while you are answering this questions?
'i'll take you there' by the staple singers
How did you get so much time off work?
i retired early
Why do you have like ten different instagram accounts? If you just hashtag each trip you take, you can still print them by trip and whatnot and then you can just use one account.
i don't have ten accounts... i just don't like a ton of people following my trips unless they really want to, so i make things a little difficult i guess, i'm weird, i don't know, we know this
Safe travels ya crazy kids!
thank you
What the fuck was up with that dude who wrote a hate comment on a childrens book? Doesn't that shit bother you? It bothers me. I hate the internet.
all you can do is be the person you want to be and then love yourself... not everyone will understand or like you, but if you understand and like you, you'll be okay no matter what... even on the internet :)
How many questions have you answered? How long are you going to keep answering quetsions?
i'm not sure, but i imagine there's probably at least a couple hundred at this point... i'll continue as long as i'm inspired to do it
Why didn't Jesus get married?
he was already married to everyone when he got here
Have you left Durham yet? I left my shoes at your house and can't find my phone to call you, lollll
i'll leave them outside my front door in the morning :)
Who, or what, is God?
you, me, we, us, everything... i usually refer to 'god' as capital L 'Love' or sometimes 'the Program' or 'the Story' or 'the Author' or 'the Sum' or all sorts of things... i especially like to refer to 'god' with the 'wrong' pronouns (she, they, it) and i have a shirt that says 'love your godde, love your neighbor, love yourself' that i wear that really trips people out, because even just spelling 'god' differently challenges/expands people's views on The Indescribable Unity
Are you bringing Phoenix and Birdie to Tulsa?
phoenix yes... birdie no
Thoughts on Anthony Bourdain?
"turns out not where, but who you're with that really matters" -- dave matthews
What is the point of this website? Don't get me wrong, I love it and I visit it every day because I'm curious about whatever you're posting and whatnot, but is there something else you're trying to do here?
i think you may have answered your own question
How to be resilient?
count your blessings
Hey there... hi... hello... you wanna maybe come to New Mexicoooooo?
i'm not planning to go any further west than oklahoma... i'z sowwy :(
Where are my keys?
on top of your head, silly
Stop peddling smut to the nation's children, Grace... UGH!
NEVER! ;)
What is your most recently watched item on Netflix?
comedians in cars getting coffee
Oh snap! Your trip is coming up soon then? Do you have the cities picked?
yep... this one won't be quite as unscripted as the journey i made five years ago, because i'm mapping out where i'm crashing each night ahead of time this go-round, but i am definitely stopping among the best people, so it will surely still have plenty of beautiful, unscripted elements
Tell me two truths and a lie about yourself.
i was an aunt before i was born, i lost a good portion of the right hemisphere of my brain at age 8 after being struck by a stray bullet, i do not have a passport
What was your first job?
i used to mow lawns to help my parents make rent and it's often 100 degrees in oklahoma in the summer and i'd mow over sticks and all sorts of crap that tore my legs all up and i swore when i grew up i would never mow a lawn ever again... i haven't lived in a place with a lawn since i left home at 17
IVAN EVERLASTING LOVE FOR YOU, GRACIE!
awww, good work
When is the road trip and are you gonna document it on Instagram or Snapchat or Facebook or?
this month and i'll probably make a new instagram account for it
Ivan!
ivan who?
Thoughts on Kate Spade?
approximately 3000 people commit suicide worldwide every single day... if you ever think you're in danger of becoming one of those people, i hope you'll reach out to me or someone you trust who will counter any shit arguments that your broken brain might be making in the moment
What makes a great comedian? What makes a great musician? What makes a great artist?
unflinching honesty
Which mysteries would you most like to be solved?
dsb wl kvlkov hzb, 'hgrxph zmw hglmvh nzb yivzp nb ylmvh yfg dliwh droo mvevi sfig nv'? rm nb vckvirvmxv, xzivovhh zmw ftob dliwh krvixv gsv hlfo rm dzbh gszg ziv uzi nliv wruurxfog gl svzo gszm z yilpvm ylmv
Tell me a secret.
love wins
What to do if you're falling in love?
start here, but recognize that they may end up building something that kills you... if you're still okay with that, then go for it and enjoy the ride
Is there anything you've done in your life that you're absolutely positive you never want to do or experience ever again no matter what?
eat peanuts
What's the most ridiculous thing you've ever done that actually turned out really well?
i think most things in my life fall into this category, but i'll go with giving birth
Do you still have any items that you grew up with?
yes
What was the name of your first pet?
I'm Not Giving You My Banking Question Info, But Nice Try (i was a very unusual pet namer)
How many people asked you to the prom?
zero (i called the assistant band director at home one night and asked him to be my date... and he said yes)
Were you popular in school?
i was nominated for 'best sense of humor', 'most studious', and 'most likely to succeed' in high school, but didn't win any of them... i was nominated for homecoming queen in college, but didn't win that either... #mostlikelytoalmostsucceed
Tell me something very few people know about Mister Rogers Neighborhood.
mr mcfeely always ran in and out of the room blurting 'speedy delivery' because he was high on meth the entire time
KNOCK KNOCK
who's there?
What's a good way to spend an afternoon?
defy gravity, survive, start fires, make, believe... in the words of birdie, "anyone can have a perfect day... just do things you like with people you love"
Did you go to Beaver Queen today? I didn't see you. :(
aw man... i'm sorry... i'm kinda checked out atm with visitors in town and whatnot... i'm sure it was amazing and i can't wait to see pictures!
Give me the best advice you can and then give me the worst advice you can.
fall upward?
Any chance you'll come to Austin on your summer road trip?
sounds nice
What's the most insane thing you've ever seen anyone do?
be born
Do you have all the answers?
oh heeeeeeeell no
If you were a ghost and could possess people, what would you make them do?
forgive... themselves first and then everybody else
Pretend you are a cat with nine lives. Which life would you be on at this point?
maybe six going into seven?
Why are we here?
to learn and to love
I think what happened on your phone is your Exchange got shut off and your phone had stored a ton of stuff automatically on Exchange instead of on your phone. (Like your contacts and whatnot.) I'm really sorry, Grace. That sucks.
it's a first world problem... i'll be okay :)
Is your mom on the way to you? Tell her Emily says hello!
she arrived around 2am, actually! she made a couple wrong turns and ended up in tennessee at one point, but made it safe and sound to her destination eventually
What's your number?
143
My job really fucking sucks. Every morning I wake up and am in a state of panic just thinking about having to get up and go to work. :( Would it be irresponsible to quit if I don't have something else lined up yet? I really don't know what to do.
i know that feeling for sure and it feels so confusing and frightening... ultimately, i don't think it's ever irresponsible to remove yourself from the orbit of people/places/things that feel unsafe for you
What's the biggest lesson you've learned so far in 2018?
be reeeeally careful with the anonymity of the internet... more and more, i can see the dangers of anonymous internet use for everyone involved
What's your next musical or artistic adventure here in Durm?
i recently scored some handbells and will be getting together with some folks in the coming days to get c(rung)k with 'em... will keep you posted on performance schedule!
Who is your favorite Biblical prophet?
jim carrey
When is the last time you felt super angry and why and how did you handle it?
i wouldn't say i felt angry necessarily, more surprised and disappointed... but apparently Duke has/had access to my iPhone (as i had given that authorization years ago, even though it's my personal phone) and yesterday they deleted six years of my emails, all of my contacts, most of my calendar items, and all notes that were stored on the phone along with a number of apps that i guess were part of the duke system, but left on something called the 'Duke Health App Store' which i cannot remove... so that's been... a learning experience... and i have handled it by remembering that privacy is a bit of an illusion and moving forward often involves not looking back... and that i need to make an appointment to go to the apple store to see if they can exorcise my phone
AHHH! Your mom is moving back to Tulsa?! HOLY CRAP! That's a big deal! When? She must be doing really well!
i know, right? i'm so excited for her! she called me tonight and is planning to arrive (hopefully) at my place in the next day or two and then at some point i may roll with her to georgia and then to oklahoma... i don't really know, we're both kinda playing things by ear and taking things one day at a time, but whatever happens, i'm super excited for her summer and her future (and mine, too)... new chapters all around
What do you usually think about when you first wake up?
what will Love accomplish today?
What are you hearing right now as you're reading this questions?
this episode of the neighborhood and a kiddo and puppy lightly snoring
Is there anyone in the world who you'd refuse to have coffee with and if so, who and why?
no... although i don't drink coffee, so i would probably just have milk or water
What do you want to be when you grow up?
a child
Tell me a story about your first kiss.
i was in college and the Phillips, Craig, and Dean song "Pour My Love On You" was playing, which i thought was super romantic (i still do, actually), even though that song is supposed to be about jesus, i guess?
Road trip soon? Like maybe to *cough* NASHVILLE *cough*?
my mom is moving from syracuse to tulsa soon, so i might tag along for some of that trip and make a pit stop in nashvegas... i'll keep you posted
CELTICS IN 2019!!!
haha... brad 5ever :)
Where is your next adventure?
where is Your next adventure?
Who was your first crush and how old were you?
doug llewelyn, the court reporter on The People's Court, and i was probably 3 or 4... i didn't know what it was, i just knew he made me feel really happy and really shy
If you were a Microsoft Office program, which one would you be?
outlook
What will the name of your debut album be?
i put out an album when i was 18 and it was called "Grace"
What's the nicest thing someone could say to you right now?
hi
How was your day?
really, really nice... and i hope yours was, too!
Would you like to be famous? In what way?
no
CELTICS IN 7!!!
hahaha... fingers and toes and eyes crossed
Describe your dog in one word.
phoenix
When and where and how did you meet Ben Folds?
the first time we met was april 8, 2004... he played springfest at the university of tulsa and then went to a diner with folks after the show
If you knew the world was going to end in the next 30 minutes, what would you do?
i would go outside and lay in a peaceful field looking up gratefully at the sky while listening to the rainbow connection on a loop until the end
YOU DISCOVER A BEAUTIFUL ISLAND UPON WHICH YOU MAY BUILD YOUR OWN SOCIETY. YOU MAKE THE RULES. WHAT ARE THE FIRST AND SECOND RULES YOU PUT INTO PLACE?
n̶o̶ ̶y̶e̶l̶l̶i̶n̶g̶ 1) listen 2) put the needs of others before your own
Who is the most recent on your missed calls list?
duke radiology
Tell me a joke.
there have been over 100 mass shootings in the U.S. before the midpoint of 2018
I guess my wording was clumsy - I meant which websites do you like to visit the most
ah, classic active/passive voice mix up (in soviet russia, website visits you!)... the internet is a giant multimedia library for me to learn everything i ever wanted to learn, so most of my internet time is spent researching whatever i'm interested in at the moment (and i'll use wikipedia, youtube, google, etc and let it take me down whatever rabbit hole)... today i spent a decent amount of time learning about harmony and nick drake's guitar tone... i also have linked some folks on my home page whose pages/works i visit daily for inspiration and peace
Would you ever consider going into the seminary?
if that was the name of a gay bar (and it should be), then yes
Have you ever broken a bone and if so, which bone was it and how did it happen?
no
Tell me a Princeton story.
one day, my mom called me and told me that her obese boyfriend had fallen through the floor of her mobile home while sitting on the toilet and as she was panicking about this (and water was coming up through the floor), a grad student friend came to my door crying... i quickly gave my mom the information on where to find the key to turn the water off and then told her i would call her back... i sat the grad student on my couch and gave her a soda and asked her what was wrong and she told me through tears that she had given her parents very specific instructions about the type of boat she wanted for her birthday and the one they got for her was not at all what she said she had wanted
CELTICS IN 6!!!
i actually think celtics in 7, but mainly because i want to see as much of this whole brain vs. (le)brawn thing as i can (and it would be more fun for brad to clinch it in boston)
Are we going to get more storytime with Grace? My daughter's obsessed with your first one!
actually, the question about 'most visited' pages reminds me that there are a few more stories i want to read... i'll try to get on that soon :)
Which websites/webpages are your most visited, and why?
i could figure out the answer to this question (because the editing platform i use has built-in tracking/analytics), but i don't care... this site is simply a safe and somewhat organized creative playground and digital scrapbook for me... maybe it will be something else one day, but i'm not focused on that right now... and i also want to say that i believe the quantification of worth via the rolling count of followers, friends, views, likes, subscribers, etc is one of the greatest plagues of the internet
Do you think you would you be embarassed if you died and before you had the chance to delete your internet history and or google search?
hell no, somebody print that shit out and publish it and make a million dollars and give it to birdie
What is your ideal girlfriend/boyfriend? In general, what are your preferences?
my ideal partner is a teammate, a co-pilot, and a best friend
What would be the most spectacular funeral you could imagine?
i actually envisioned my funeral waaaay more than my wedding as a child (adorable?!) and i wanted one of every type of person there from the homeless to the kings and i wanted them all to say, 'grace knew me and understood me and heard me and loved me'
Where is the last place you went out to eat and who did you go with?
i went to noodles and company last night with birdie
Is Durham past the point of no return?
maybe, but i'll keep fighting as long as i can anyway
What is a controversial opinion that you hold that many people around you do not agree with?
love your enemies
I am finally leaving the terrible supervisor and the news is nearly public. How did you celebrate leaving terrible people?
my heart soars for you! freedom feels so amazing! and finding the courage to distance yourself from people/places/things that you know are harmful is its own reward, but maybe also shoot me an email/text and we'll celebrate with some brunch/lunch/dinner/whatever soon :)
Have any songs ever made you cry? If so, which ones come to mind?
i remember crying as a toddler during nat king cole's 'a blossom fell' and also about a minute into this version of amazing grace when the bagpipe-bass drops... as i got older, i cried over 'story-based' songs like lightnin' hopkins' 'mr charlie', dixie chicks' 'travelin' soldier, brad paisley's 'he didn't have to be', etc. and as an adult i've cried over songs like nick drake's 'northern sky' and labi siffre's 'watch me'... but i know there are a trillion others
Why do you send your son to a public school instead of a private school?
“We live in a world in which we need to share responsibility. It's easy to say, 'It's not my child, not my community, not my world, not my problem.' Then there are those who see the need and respond. I consider those people my heroes.” -- Fred Rogers
Given the choice of anyone in the world, who would you want as a dinner guest?
you
Do you go to church anywhere?
i go to church everywhere
Tell me a story about the future.
love wins
What's your dream job?
all of them at least once
I miss your haikus and songs. GIVE US SOME HAIKUS AND SONGS WOMAN!!
this website is only in its beginning stages... there will be a time and place for everything
In 40 years what will people be nostalgic for?
public schools
In your experience, what is the most hurtful thing friends or colleagues can say to someone newly separated or divorced?
you need to pray more
Do you have any premonition about when you're going to die or how?
i'm honestly surprised i'm still here and am mainly just focused on doing the best i can with each day i'm given
How have you changed over the past 12 months? (Arbitrary marker, I know)
my first thought was that i'm not sure that i have, and then my second thought was that i drink more water and eat healthier food, and then my third thought was to ask my three closest friends what they thought: megan pointed me towards my own thoughts (see here and here), jeff dropped wisdom on me like it was hot (see here, here, here, and here), and sarah made a date for us to get dinner this weekend and cracked jokes (see here and here)... so what i learned most from introspecting a bit on this question is that i am the luckiest person on the planet to have three of the greatest humans on the planet in my orbit for 23 years, 12 years, and 6 years respectively --------- [edit to add this and this sent from sarah after i originally answered this question]
After I sent that, I realized I had another related question, so I guess you'll get to be proud of my twice, lol. How long should you wait to date after separation or divorce?
i can't say what's right for me is always right for anyone else, but it seems wise to take a good amount of time getting to know yourself again... and by 'good amount of time', i mean at least a year past the divorce being final... but i also know that i'm a turtle about this kind of thing
Is it okay to date when you're separated? In NC you have to be separated for a year before the divorce will be granted and that's a long time to wait.
i dated a little bit during my separation and wish i hadn't... i think that it's hard to not want to jump right into someone (anyone) else's arms to ease the pain, but that's incredibly unfair to the person you're dating who is (if you're being honest with yourself) a rebound/filler/distraction
My mom died like two years ago and I'm still sad about it. Does it ever get better?
some of the best advice anyone's given me is, 'take your broken heart and make it art'... try turning your feelings into music, painting, poetry, anything... and i think you'll see things improve
How are you holding up?
feelin' stronger every day
Can men and women be just friends or does sex always get in the way?
love and sex are not one and the same... i love lots of people and don't have sex with them and have mentioned this already many questions down... one of my three closest friends is a man who i've known for over a decade and we've never had (and will never have) sex together, sooo... (although we are married in the eyes of Costco... every unmarried person should find someone to fake a marriage with to split the cost of Costco membership... that's just smart shopping, y'all... plus, you'll be able to get gas for like $2/gal)
Would you ever flirt with/pursue a taken guy?
sources differ pretty wildly on what 'flirt' or 'taken' mean exactly, but i know what 'pursue' means and i know what committed closed relationships are, so i think i understand the gist of the question and my answer is absolutely fucking not... during the last relationship i was in a few years back, the guy dropped a bomb about four months in that he was 'still technically married' and it was 'no big deal', he just 'needed to do some paperwork', which told me that he either a) had no clue how devastating divorce actually is or b) had no clue how important his marriage should have been... trying to detangle from one another at that point was pretty painful (although, his ex-wife and i are now friends and i think she's absolutely brilliant and beautiful, so, silver lining!)... oh, and i dated a visiting professor last spring who burst into tears on our second date at which point they confessed that they were married and i found myself awkwardly consoling/counseling them about it for over an hour before awkwardly dropping them back at the faculty dorms... honestly, i'm left wondering if/how i'm supposed to ask for proof that someone isn't married on the first date? i didn't realize that was necessary, but maybe it is?
Tell me a story from your childhood that you've never told online before.
there was a cici's pizza in the strip mall behind the apartments where i grew up and if you went in the alley when they were closing, the assistant manager would sneak you the pizzas that were left over from the buffet before they were thrown in the dumpsters, which the manager usually kept padlocked to 'keep the vagrants out'
What have you always wanted to do but never done and why haven't you done it?
my earliest memory is looking through crib bars to watch The Price is Right and all through college, i kept trying to get people to do a spring break TPIR trip, but we always ended up doing habitat service work or something lame-o like that instead ;)
What's your dream house?
the one with all the people i love in it
What's your dream car?
the one i have now... (and i plan to drive it until the wheels fall off and then maybe even after that if i can figure out how to get the wheels back on)
Oh noooozz! I'm sorry you're sick. Can I send you some chicken noodle soup via Amazon Now?
is that a thing? also, yes please
Thoughts on the TRAVESTY of Brad Stevens getting ZERO votes for Coach of the Year? WTF?!
he has never been one of the cool kids nor has he ever cared or wanted to be... and in the words of michael scott, "i do my best work when people don't believe in me"
What would be the best thing(s) that could happen to you right now?
t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶s̶ ̶d̶o̶n̶'̶t̶ ̶u̶s̶u̶a̶l̶l̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶p̶p̶e̶n̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶m̶e̶,̶ ̶i̶ ̶u̶s̶u̶a̶l̶l̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶p̶p̶e̶n̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶o̶t̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶s̶.̶.̶.̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶i̶n̶ ̶t̶e̶r̶m̶s̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶l̶a̶b̶e̶l̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶s̶ ̶b̶e̶s̶t̶/̶w̶o̶r̶s̶t̶,̶ ̶o̶f̶t̶e̶n̶ ̶t̶i̶m̶e̶s̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶'̶w̶o̶r̶s̶t̶'̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶s̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶h̶a̶p̶p̶e̶n̶e̶d̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶m̶e̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶t̶u̶r̶n̶e̶d̶ ̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶b̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶b̶e̶s̶t̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶s̶.̶.̶.̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ ̶j̶u̶s̶t̶ ̶n̶e̶v̶e̶r̶ ̶k̶n̶o̶w̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶l̶i̶f̶e̶ ̶i̶s̶ ̶a̶ ̶p̶a̶r̶a̶d̶o̶x̶ ̶l̶i̶k̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶s̶o̶m̶e̶t̶i̶m̶e̶s̶.̶.̶.̶ i'd like to go on a long walk
Hey lady bones, I'm serious about the teaching thing. You should really consider it. Are you going to the rally tomorrow?
i was supposed to be in DC wed/thurs this week, but i appear to have come down with some kinda bug, so i'm stuck indoors fighting that off, but my heart is with the marchers for sure and maybe in the classroom with them in the fall, we'll see
Why aren't you answering your phone?
i just talked to someone on the phone for almost an hour... and it seems like you still found a way to reach me, soooo... are you sure you're dialing the right number?
REMINDER: 8:30pm Tuesday night ESPN
i'm on it!
What happened to not calling people names?
i don't think i've called anyone any names, but i also haven't censored and will not censor anyone's submission to this page... that said, i'm not perfect (or even close to it) so if you see something specific that you find questionable, let me know... my intent is always to challenge shitty behaviors (in myself, too) and not people's inherent worth if ever i can help it
Anything new and exciting going on this week?
i sure hope so!
Uhhhhhhh I'm a lesbian, so I don't think I need that condom LOLOL!!! More room in my packets I guess!
i didn't suggest a condom for the reason you may think i did
I notice you finally dropped that demon from your home page. Thank you. Forgiveness cannot come before repentance and he still thinks he's the victim.
i didn't realize the ongoing nature of the situation and was honestly just thinking about where i was in my own personal healing process and i'm sorry for causing anyone else pain or fucking up anyone else's journey... i'm still figuring this life out as i go along and i'm grateful for friends who gently (or not so gently) nudge me when i drift too far... thank you for continuing to be patient with me
How?
any way you choose
Why?
because
Where?
there
When?
whensday
What?
that
Who?
you
Okay, so here's the issue of the day: I hate doing the dishes, but my partner also hates doing the dishes, so now nobody does the dishes. How do we fix this, Oracle Grace?
only eat fruit and then throw the fruit waste outside your door in the street and when people are like, "wtf, why are you just throwing your garbage in the street?" just say you're composting and then they'll be like, "oooo!" and you'll be voted president of your HOA... i guess, i wouldn't know, i don't really know what an HOA is
I like your face.
thank you
Do you still leave cups of milk in random places that you find days later by their smell?
no... comment
What five things should every person carry in their pockets?
phone, ID, form of payment, key, condom
How do you feel about trains?
i love trains and i haven't ridden one in a long time, so maybe i'll have to do that in the near future
What's the mediumest thing you've ever done on a train?
i kind of miss little rides on the Dinky, which was a one car train that went between the Princeton Junction station and the Princeton campus... i'm not even sure it still exists
What's the worst thing you've ever done on a train?
drank mikes hard lemonade out of a paper bag into a blackout on NJ transit? i can't remember, but that feels accurate
What's the best thing you've ever done on a train?
i once sang the entirety of Hall & Oates' "Rock 'n Soul Part 1" aloud on the express train between NYC and DC
How do I tell someone I have a huge enormous mega super giant crush on them?
any way you choose
Are you the only person adding songs to that playlist? Caaause it's about seven billion songs long. What is the limit of songs in a spotify playlist?
yes/no/sort of/i don't know/i'm looking forward to finding out
What was the last thing you said out loud?
"I love you, Megsies."
What are your Mother's Day plans?
love, love, love, play, play, play, repeat
Is it possible to love someone you don't know?
this is an excellent question and i have three thoughts on it...
1) you could stop that question right after 'possible' and the answer would be 'yes' no matter what comes after because all things are possible... not all things are practical or good, but all things are possible
4) love is not a feeling, love is a verb and a choice... a unilateral action, not a reciprocal action (although it's certainly fun when the action is reciprocated)... so, for example, when a person donates to a cause, but doesn't see the end result of that donation in action, they are still able to love someone they don't know
3) proximity in space or duration of time does not always indicate any level of 'knowing'... some people live together, are married, even have children together, yet never know one another... a person must know themselves first and then allow themselves to be known by someone else and there are many ways to do (or not do) that
Holy shit, do you seriously not work at Duke anymore?
that is correct
Did you actually listen to the song "Get Paid"? It's horrendous. Like legit horrendous. And misogynist and just gross. One of the lines is like, "fucked her so good she started cooking" or something like that. Why are you defending having that song played in JVG? I'd have probably said something too. Actually, I would have probably been too scared, but I would have wanted to say something, because that song is so awful. Like so bad. You gotta know that, Grace. Sometimes censorship is good. There could have been kids in that coffee shop.
i think it was completely in the realm of reasonability for a person to politely request a song like that to not be played, especially if they were there with their kids or what have you (or they could just... ya know... leave)... and the barista not only complied with Moneta's request by turning the music off (a shuffled playlist from Spotify that the barista did not create or even have the presence of mind during a busy shift to even notice), she also offered Moneta his favorite vegan muffin and tea for free... but that wasn't good enough and Moneta got everyone in the shop fired... the media made it about a song, but it was really about a powerful entity wielding unchecked power on the vulnerable... this article sums up my feelings perfectly... (p.s. censorship is garbage and i'm never going to believe it's good... not ever)
Are you the person who painted the bridge? (It's brilliant on so many levels.)
i may or may not know who did
Which is more preferable being nice or being fair?
i'm a 51% grace, 49% justice kind of gal who dreams of being a 100% grace, 0% justice kind of gal and very very rarely tilts to being a 51% justice, 49% grace kind of gal when a person or group of people use their power to hurt the vulnerable without remorse... but even then, i hope the final outcome is restorative for all involved and not punitive
What's your favorite color?
rainbow
Thoughts on the upcoming teacher walkout?
i walked out years ago
Are you wearing pants right now?
not sure what's up with this strange recurring question, but yes
What's one concrete thing I can do right now to help humanity? No murky general answer world peace pageant answer here, I really want you to give me something specific. (please)
you could donate to the fund that's bailing out mommas from my local jail who can't afford pre-trial bail... four released today and more tomorrow, just in time for mother's day! (or if you're local, join us at the durham jail tomorrow)... or start up something similar where you live, because cash bail is unbelievably unjust and makes money off of people's suffering and does nothing to rehabilitate or reform (if the person even actually committed a crime in the first place, which they very often did not)
I CANNOT BELIEVE WE VOTED THE SHERIFF OUT! I'm literally crying right now. Durham is amazing! Could we see the end of the war on the poor in our lifetime? At least in one town?
we're not quite out of the woods yet, because Andrews is still in power until the end of the year (and Duke still employs 35,000+ people in our town and is problematic as fuck), but at least the clock is ticking down on one pretty significant area of concern... the work continues (and always will)
How was your day?
pretty fantastic and getting better all the time! i'm currently jonesing for a great election result and some significant shifting of priorities at my local Institution Of Unnecessarily Expensive Learning™ and then perhaps i'll have really bowled 300 on the day
OMG! LMAOOOO @ ripping your pants on the fence. I can TOTALLY picture it! Only you, Grace. Only. You.
#worldsokayesthero
I know you don't really care about voting or anything, but I think you should really think about getting out there and paying attention to what's happening in your community and maybe try to help vulnerable people or something. ;)
har har... i keep refreshing this page like a crazy person... the worst part is that even if the election goes the way it should, it will still be months before that man is out of power and until then, we've gotta continue to hang together lest we all hang separately... got your back, Durham... we won't go silently into the night... not today, Satan
Figure out the 9-5 thing yet?
getting closer every day, but have to tie up a few loose ends first
De donde eres?
everywhere
Do you have any specific anxiety triggers?
the same as anyone else, i imagine... i'm more flight than fight, though, and anytime i catch a whiff of the potential for violence/explosive or sudden anger/etc, i'm going to freeze and/or flee for sure
How to friend bad?
something that i find really unsettling is labeling a person rather than a behavior... for instance, saying someone is a shitty person rather than saying something they did/said was shitty or made you feel shitty... when you label a person instead of a behavior, you lay down a permanent judgement that leaves no room for redemption and i find that to be perhaps the most vulgar thing of all
That mind reading invention is INSANE. I'm legit freaked out. What's next?
i'm pretty excited about being able to communicate in real time with people on the ground while flying through the air... which is a technology that has probably been around for awhile, but it's new to me and makes me feel like a superhero for some reason... i guess progress happens whether we're ready or not (and that's great news!)
Can we use this box as an advice column and you tell us how to handle random issues? Or just a place to vent all the bullshit? Way cheaper than therapy!
sure... although i will never tell you how to handle things... i can listen and share my own experiences (maybe), but only you'll know what's right for you
Are you hating on Rachel Bloom? She's my favorite and she reminds me a ton of you. Is it one of those things where you're too much alike and so you hate her?
absolutely not! she's a genius and i adore her... i haven't had time to watch the show, but i have seen a ton of clips and they are musical, comedic gold
Wanna party?
sure?
Do you have any other favorite vines?
sure
Hey! I saw you and [redacted] and [redacted] at [redacted] doing [redacted]! It was so [redacted]! Can you explain yourself, madam?!
[redacted]
Where does a general keep his armies? In his sleevies. WHAT
son, you're fuckin' high
Did you block me on Twitter. :(
no! i just completed everything i needed to and closed up shop... i think it's useful when you go shopping for jackets to try on lots of them, including ones you think won't look right on you, because sometimes you'll find that something fits you better than you thought... but sometimes you'll find that you were right and it's not the jacket for you... twitter is not the jacket for me right now
WHAT THE FUCK! GRACE! YOU HAVE TO WATCH THIS CELTICS SERIES! I don't care what else is distracting you. Turn it off and get back in the game.
i saw he was trending #1 on twitter the other day and my heart flew straight out of my chest... i'm tuned in, i promise (and so is he, obviously)
Well well well! I see you're not posting this weekend and I bet I know whyyyy!
actually, i have shared something online every day, but maybe not in the places you frequent
Do you feel wanted?
do you want me?
Tell me a story.
last week, i saw someone on the side of the highway and their car was smoking and there was also a homeless person holding a sign a few feet away on the other side of the road... i drove by the scene and then pulled over to see if i could help, but i accidentally pulled over into an area where i had to scale a chain link fence to get back to the people in need of help and while i was scaling it, i dropped the bottle of water i was carrying and caught my jeans on the fence and fell forward on my face ripping my jeans nearly off... as i hung upside down off the fence, the driver and the homeless guy both ran over to help me and as they were running towards me, someone rear ended the smoking car, pushing it into the pole right where the homeless guy had been standing... this is not a metaphor for anything (well, i mean, it probably is and i'll think about that later)... this literally happened on 15/501 near i-40 and the persian rug store
How to friend good?
support each other's individual flights and then pick each other up if/when one has crash landed by singing the lyrics into their earpiece until it's time for takeoff again
What movie were you conceived to?
E.T. the Extra Terrestrial
Do you post everything that is submitted to you? Why or why not?
i don't post things that people ask me not to post or that i've already answered... i also don't post anything that would jeopardize the privacy of someone without their permission
Do you think we should just nuke the internet and start over?
ABSOLUTELY NOT!
Prove that #romance is not dead. #notblessed
if that were the case, then explain songs like this
YOU'RE BACK ON FACEBOOK! YAAAAASSS! I knew you'd come back!
not quite... just running a test of the emergency broadcast system
What do we want?
to be wanted
What do you want to achieve by the end of this year?
i really don't live my life that way, for perhaps two reasons: one, i find it unsettling and perhaps presumptuous to assume i'll be alive tomorrow much less a year from now or five years or ten years, etc... and two, i believe the Universe has bigger plans for me than i could dream and i'll be selling myself short if i make a plan and don't allow the plan to get blown up for a better plan to manifest... so, tl;dr it would be great if i am alive on Jan 1, 2019 and could say that i experienced 243 more days of 2018 during which i listened well and moved in the directions i was guided to go
DEM CELTICS DOE! Is that what the kidz say these days? Ya boyy is KILLING!
i hope you're sitting down for this, but... i haven't watched a basketball game all year (including March Madness)... gaaaah don't tell Brad! i've been hyper-focused elsewhere, BUT i hear he's killing it and i'm obviously not surprised... he's an angel through and through
What YouTube channel should I check out?
i'm really impressed with Sean Evans' "Hot Ones" where he interviews a wide range of folks while they eat progressively spicier wings to the point where the interviewee is often barely able to speak... Sean is a fantastic researcher/interviewer, perhaps the best out there right now
How do you deal with social anxiety?
ask questions? then the other person has to talk!
What advice would you give a new parent?
listen to the wisdom of your child and take it seriously, teach your child to be a good friend by modeling what being a good friend looks like, and pave the runway
Do you have plans to find a partner or are you happy on your own?
mann tracht, un gott lacht
Did you figure out the 9-5 thing?
you hiring?
Best art installation in the Triangle right now?
everything is great and everything should be seen and i don't want to hand out prize ribbons, nor do i feel qualified to do so... that said, if i could spend every day at You Are Here, i would
Who farted?
i believe it was the lord who said, "let he who first smelt it be he who is accused of dealting it"
What's your favorite Bible verse?
"Then came Peter saying, 'Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Until seven times?' Jesus saith unto him, 'I say not unto thee until seven times but until seventy times seven.' Then Peter said, 'Fair enough, but on the 491st time, can I choke that bitch?" -- Matthew 18:21-22b, Grace Living Translation
What's the most recent full album you listened to that you thought was really great?
Vance Joy and Kacey Musgraves both came out with absolutely outstanding albums this year... but what's giving me all the feels at the moment is a compilation of The Price is Right music cues from the past 40+ years
Have you got any distressing news items?
during The Office wrap party in Scranton, I mentioned that I was on a hunt for some rare beers from that part of the country to give as a gift to a friend of mine back in Carolina... Creed immediately asked for my keys and then drove off in my car only to return about an hour later with a trunk full of extremely expensive/rare beers... the exact ones that had been on the list my friend had given me and that Creed never saw
AHHH!!! YAAASSS!!! THANK YOU! The Birdie page is gonna be my favorite!
mine too
Can I has Birdie story pleeeeeze?
your persistence has paid off... i'll add more (from past and present) in the coming days
Who do you think you are?
a 911 operator for the deaf
Have you got any fun celebrity stories?
FLINT STILL DOESN'T HAVE CLEAN WATER
Have you only watched the first episode of Handmaid's? (cause the second one is... woahhhh)
watched #2 late last night and feel like i made the sex scene happen through the force of my own will
How do I get this clog out of my bathtub?
call 911
Any good concerts coming up in your area in the next few days? ;)
i hear there's a couple of terrible ones going down ;)
What was the last text you sent and who did you send it to?
'be over in a sec' sent to my neighbor a few houses down
What were the last words to come out of your mouth before you answered this question?
not completely sure, but i think it was, "oooooh, greg kinnear, you beautiful motherfucker!"
What was the last thing you read called and what was it about?
'the terrorist inside my husband's brain', an article written by robin williams' widow
What was the biggest inspiration for your new Twitter and its all-caps style?
my main inspiration was every social media account ever, but i was probably also somewhat influenced by the brilliant conner o'malley who used his vine to make guttural, animalistic wails at people on boats, playing tennis, on the red carpet at the tribeca film festival, at a fancy restaurant table, as well as businessmen getting their shoes shined and driving various luxury vehicles in new york city... and more
I love you.
i love you, too
What are your thoughts on the Brokaw news?
there's no way that a nearly 80 year old man ever tried to cheat on his wife ever, there's no way that a man and a woman could send confusing signals to one another or interpret each other's signals wrong, there's no way that a woman could feel intimidated or even traumatized when propositioned by an extremely powerful man, there's no way that NBC could try to cover up or otherwise silence anyone speaking out about discomfort by anyone at any time, and i am 100% positive that Rachel Maddow is lying and she was definitely sexually harassed as a young lesbian by Tom Brokaw and is only saying she wasn't for attention
Did you intentionally fuck up your Facebook algorithm at the end there with that string of "easter is coming" posts? If so, why?
yes... because it helps to throw a weird scent in the opposite direction as you pivot
Sooo... Handmaid's Tale Season Two, amirite?!?1?1
YES... couldn't have come at a better time... and i actually stood up and applauded in my room at the end of the first episode of the new season... and i'm glad they are releasing them one at a time, because i don't think my soul could take more than one episode per week
I LOVE YOUR NEW TWITTER FEED IT MAKES ME LAUGH AND I LOVE YOU VERY MUCH
thank you... er... YOU'RE WELCOME ;)
OMFG your twitter gives me anxiety!
i am excited that in five tweets or less, i accurately portrayed how all social media feels to me
Why is the playlist called "love layers"? What does "love layers" mean?
maybe we can figure it out together
What are you trying to communicate with the playlist?
i suspect each song communicates something different, but you'll have to listen to them yourself and see... and if they don't communicate anything to you, then perhaps you're supposed to listen to some other songs instead and that's totally okay
I wasn't the person who asked about what confuses you, but I really liked your answers and wonder if there's more? I don't know... sometimes I think I'm confused about everything and it's nice to know that other people are confused about things too, maybe even people who seem like they aren't confused at all about anything. Like you seem to not be someone that's got it all figured out, so to know that some things confuse you makes me feel less alone. I'm rambling. I ramble.
oh, the only way i would ever not be confused about anything is by first being confused about it and then trying to stumble around the room to figure it out... being confused is the default... and if i'm not feeling as confused as usual, i usually go searching for more things to be confused by
Too bad that car that hit you didn't finished the damn job! Knock on that you know it all bitch!
i hate to overstep my position, but it seems like it may be ill advised to send harassing messages to someone from your work computer
What's your next big project?
creating and inventing in a new language
Do you ever just straight up say what the fuck you mean? I'm with Jack Nicholson. People who speak in metaphors can go shampoo my crotch.
i'm less interested in saying exactly what i mean and more interested in having meaning in exactly what i say... jack nicholson didn't say that, melvin udall (sort of?) said that... and that's actually one of my favorite movies, but for perhaps different reasons than why you might like it
What are your thoughts on the Cosby news?
semen and fecal matter was found in one of the women's ear canals
Why did Jesus speak in parables?
why do parents put their babies in carseats?
What are your summer plans?
be at peace
What’s the last thing that made you cry? What’s the last thing that made you laugh?
after the Carmen Sandiego question, I googled “Carmen Sandiego and Waldo” to see if anyone had ever thought of that before and found this pinterest board, parts of which made me laugh and (inexplicably?) also cry
Tell me the most meaningful sign you’ve seen/heard/felt lately.
call before you dig
Why are people both the worst and the best?
i think that maybe we are all made to be 51% selfless and 49% selfish and sometimes we get the proportions wrong
What’s the most impactful lesson you’ve learned this week?
the only thing that was ever stopping me from leaving a soul killing work environment was me
I KNEW IT! Who is he? Or she? Or they? Or... it?
me
Did you fall in love with someone recently?
did you?
What are you wearing?
a strong sense of determination
What's the last month been like for you? With being off Facebook, and other stuff in general
i got hit by a car (metaphorically and literally) in february and realized that i needed to seriously adjust some things in my life and some of those things have been easy and a complete joy to adjust over the past few weeks (like leaving Facebook, starting/maintaining this site, creating art/music again, spending more time exploring and listening and learning) and some of those things have been unspeakably challenging/sad (like confronting some very serious/unethical situations at my employer of nearly six years, finally making some necessary medical appointments that i'd been intentionally putting off, stepping into the abyss of job hunting) but all in all, 2018 has been a beautiful reawakening of parts of me that i thought died a long time ago... with that said, big shifts in our lives (even positive ones) are not always easy and can be very confusing and frightening at times and sometimes we fuck things up on accident during the whirlwind... i feel like i'm in one of those videos where a deaf person has their new cochlear implant turned on and everybody softly and sweetly whispers "hello!", only in my case, my implant got turned on unexpectedly at a Springsteen concert during "Born to Run" while i was leaning up against a speaker on the front row
Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?
i can only hope that she found Waldo and they are living happily ever after
We're gonna miss you. :( Two-ply will never be the same. #workingatdook
it was time... it was way beyond time... it's been time for a long time
GRAAAAACE! I totally forgot about xkcd! Now I'm going back and reading all of them and I'm having flashbacks of grad school. I remember back in the day when you had the "FUCK. THAT. SHIT." one on your cube wall.
yeah, and it only took me like 10 more years before i actually listened!
What is the loneliest number?
240
Do you want a hug?
yes, as long as you really mean it
What confuses you?
pediatric cancer and non-pediatric cancer, how to survive loving and loathing humanity, why one seems to equal two and two seems to equal one, the complications of obtaining consent for courtship between hypnotists, why can't we play all the time in the park... you know, the usual
You better look out because I'm gonna say fuck. You! better! look! out! because! I'm! gonna! say! FUCK! FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!
#blessed
You should go back to teaching! Little ones love you and we need you more than ever!
it's on the list of consideration
Do you think Mr Rogers was gay?
no, mainly because i got to see an advanced screening of an upcoming documentary and in it, the actor who played Officer Clemmons said that during his later years working on the show, he was openly gay, and if anyone would know about Fred being closeted, it would be him... and he wanted to put it to rest that the answer is no, Fred Rogers was not gay
What attributes do you most appreciate in others?
authenticity, bashful confidence, confident bashfulness, curiosity, empathy, forgiveness, humility, humor, imperfection, ingenuity, integrity, kindness, patience, resilience, tenacity... a love for making lists of alphabetized attributes and/or a love of those who love making lists of alphabetized attributes
YES! BIRDIE STORIES! May I have another?!
his last words before he fell asleep tonight were, "when i turn 18, i'm going to build a tornado safe room for the house... and then i'm going to build a tornado"
Did you figure out the 9-5 thing you mentioned a few days ago?
not yet... still a̶n̶x̶i̶e̶t̶y̶ ̶v̶o̶m̶i̶t̶i̶n̶g̶ considering my options
What city outside of North Carolina do you visit most often?
Washington D.C.
Is ADHD real or is it just something used to medicate unruly kids?
i think that brain chemicals can be pretty wild and every person has to figure out how to manage theirs in whatever way is most functional for the life they want to live... for the record, i wasn't diagnosed with ADHD until i was 27 years old, so it's not just kids who are diagnosed... and without ADHD treatment, i'm not sure i would have had nearly as stable of a life as i've had over the past few years... i'm not saying the diagnosis is right for everyone (or for children), i'm just offering my personal experience
When are you gonna run for City Council, Madam?
reading that question literally made me shudder... so...
What are the best things about North Carolina?
i̶ ̶c̶a̶n̶'̶t̶ ̶v̶o̶u̶c̶h̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶a̶l̶l̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶N̶o̶r̶t̶h̶ ̶C̶a̶r̶o̶l̶i̶n̶a̶,̶ ̶b̶u̶t̶ ̶i̶'̶m̶ ̶p̶r̶e̶t̶t̶y̶ ̶p̶a̶s̶s̶i̶o̶n̶a̶t̶e̶ ̶a̶b̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶D̶u̶r̶h̶a̶m̶.̶.̶.̶ ̶i̶'̶m̶ ̶t̶h̶r̶e̶e̶ ̶h̶o̶u̶r̶s̶ ̶f̶r̶o̶m̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶b̶e̶a̶c̶h̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶t̶h̶r̶e̶e̶ ̶h̶o̶u̶r̶s̶ ̶f̶r̶o̶m̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶m̶o̶u̶n̶t̶a̶i̶n̶s̶.̶.̶.̶ ̶y̶e̶s̶t̶e̶r̶d̶a̶y̶,̶ ̶i̶ ̶c̶a̶l̶l̶e̶d̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶a̶ ̶r̶e̶p̶a̶i̶r̶ ̶o̶n̶ ̶m̶y̶ ̶w̶a̶t̶e̶r̶ ̶h̶e̶a̶t̶e̶r̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶p̶e̶r̶s̶o̶n̶ ̶w̶h̶o̶ ̶s̶h̶o̶w̶e̶d̶ ̶u̶p̶ ̶w̶a̶s̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶b̶a̶s̶s̶i̶s̶t̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶r̶o̶b̶e̶r̶t̶a̶ ̶f̶l̶a̶c̶k̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶a̶f̶t̶e̶r̶ ̶h̶e̶ ̶a̶d̶j̶u̶s̶t̶e̶d̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶t̶a̶n̶k̶,̶ ̶w̶e̶ ̶j̶a̶m̶m̶e̶d̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶1̶5̶ ̶m̶i̶n̶u̶t̶e̶s̶ ̶i̶n̶ ̶m̶y̶ ̶l̶i̶v̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶r̶o̶o̶m̶.̶.̶.̶ ̶t̶o̶d̶a̶y̶,̶ ̶m̶y̶ ̶s̶o̶n̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶i̶ ̶h̶a̶d̶ ̶p̶o̶p̶s̶i̶c̶l̶e̶s̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶b̶r̶a̶n̶f̶o̶r̶d̶ ̶m̶a̶r̶s̶a̶l̶i̶s̶.̶.̶.̶ ̶a̶ ̶f̶e̶w̶ ̶w̶e̶e̶k̶s̶ ̶a̶g̶o̶,̶ ̶i̶ ̶w̶a̶l̶k̶e̶d̶ ̶a̶r̶o̶u̶n̶d̶ ̶a̶ ̶g̶a̶r̶d̶e̶n̶ ̶s̶i̶n̶g̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶l̶o̶u̶d̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶s̶u̶n̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶p̶l̶a̶n̶t̶s̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶n̶o̶ ̶o̶n̶e̶ ̶b̶a̶t̶t̶e̶d̶ ̶a̶n̶ ̶e̶y̶e̶.̶.̶.̶ ̶s̶t̶u̶f̶f̶ ̶l̶i̶k̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶,̶ ̶i̶ ̶g̶u̶e̶s̶s̶
the best thing about North Carolina is that it's dull
You changed your playlist label on the home page from "seduce" to "communicate"-- why? Also, I may be too obsessed with your website and your life. :P
i just thought i was trying to do one thing and then realized i'm actually trying to do something else... also, keep in mind that this website is simply a playground for me to play in and (like my life) as much as it may appear that i have a plan, i'm really just winging it
Hey... I'm the person who asked about broken hearts and I was actually talking about grief and not like romantic heartbreak.
grief is its own animal for sure and, now that you mention it, one that i've been (not) dealing with lately... and i could/should never advise anyone on dealing with grief 'correctly' or 'functionally' because i'm actually really awful at big transitions and change, especially changes/transitions that are out of my control... when i lose something/someone unexpectedly, i often burn everything in my life to the ground perhaps out of the need to feel like i'm still in control of something... just know that feeling lost and angry and distraught and confused (and more) is totally understandable and no feeling is ever permanent
Okay but seriously: Why the FUCK is it still Winter? It's April! I shouldn't be shoveling snow.
it's actually sunny and in the 60s where i am (finally!!), so my little man and i are going to spend a good amount of time outside today to soak it up while it lasts... if it's still snowing where you are, just know that i'm sending you lots of warm thoughts and snuggles
Is your answer to the question about broken hearts how you personally operate or just what you think people should do? When I have a broken heart, I usually just cry and eat a lot. Maybe watch movies.
it's just how i personally operate... and i'd also say that sometimes broken hearts and broken minds are two sides of the same coin and to deal with the brain part, i guess i do some 'unique' things, too... but, ultimately, everybody needs to find their own ways of healing when their hearts/brains are hurting... for instance, my brain can sometimes send me some false/repetitive messaging like, 'you're hopeless' or 'you're too broken' or 'you're a mistake' or whatever other kind of lie and (along with talking with other people i trust about those lies so that those trusted other people can provide counter-arguments) i actively try to sort of 'reprogram' my brain when that's happening by listening to truthful alternative messaging on a loop... and i should note that i'm not giving 'official clinical advice' on this page (or ever), i'm just saying that it's more than okay and often wonderfully useful to create unique ways to solve problems and you should definitely try lots of things and see what works best for you
Do you think someone who participates in S&M is physically harming someone? What are your thoughts on polyamory?
consensual sensory exploration between people by definition can't be physically harmful, because it's consensual and the consensual ways (and numerical configurations) of how anyone chooses to live/love should be no one's concern except for the people involved in the exploring and the configuring
WHEN ARE YOU COMING TO NASHVILLE AGAIN?!?!?1?!1? p.s. i love you and i miss you
i actually thought a lot today about the fact that i haven't traveled since november and i really need to, so i'll probably pass through there in the next month or so... i promise to let folks know when i'm heading that way... (also, i don't know who this is, but i'm 100% sure that i love you and miss you, too)
Are you still doing stand up?
sometimes i also sit and lie down
Are you wearing pants right now?
no
What sorts of things/thoughts have been occupying your time lately?
i've been thinking a lot about how Love would never ever force lyrics on someone who prefers instrumental music and i've been wondering a lot about whether or not meteorologists ever feel embarrassed or ashamed when they get the forecast wrong
How do you mend a broken heart?
be immensely proud of yourself for taking the risk to love anything at all, redirect the love you were pouring out onto someone else onto yourself for a little while, send light and love and peace towards the sky for the other person(s) and trust that it will get where it needs to go, and listen to uplifting music that reminds you of your beauty and worth... (if you need song recommendations, let me know, but putting together your own list can often be better just because you'll feel more ownership/connection to the songs)
I'm sorry about the tactless jerk earlier in the questions. I do hope you eventually tell us about Conan and Ben and other celebrity friendship stories on the Reveal page.
'celebrity' is fake, evil, and toxic... no person on this earth has more/less worth than any other... i met conan for one day many years ago and we had a pleasant and uplifting interaction... ben and i are each other's AA sponsors, which works out great unless we're both off the wagon at the same time... i'll keep you posted if/when i have anything else to say about them or anyone else
Do you think you'd ever have it in you to physically harm another?
i have unfortunately experienced a number of instances of being a witness to violence and my first instinct is usually to dive into the middle and absorb the blows... i don't know if that answers your question
Your words give me ASMR feelings sometimes.
nice! i do tend to write (and sing and move and think and feel) in a somewhat soft/rhythmic way and if that gives other people peaceful/tingly feelings, then that certainly makes me happy
How are you today?
alive
Do you want to fuck me?
do You want to fuck you?
Did you fuck Conan?
something you should probably consider is that it's possible for people to love other people without those people always having sex with each other... if this is a new concept for you, i suggest you start by loving your siblings or parents or your elderly neighbors, etc. and once you successfully love them without having sex with them, work your way outwards from there
Did you fuck Ben Folds?
thank you for this incredibly invasive, rude question... perhaps you should ask yourself what you believe the answer to that question would tell you about me (or Ben) or what it says about you that you are interested enough to have chosen this question to ask out of an infinite number of potential questions
Do you still do improv? Why or why not?
isn't my entire life improv? isn't yours?
What did you eat for breakfast?
lunch
What's the best piece of advice anyone's ever given you?
take your broken heart and make it art
If you could be anywhere right now, where would it be?
in the words of Dave Matthews, "turns out, not where but who you're with that really matters"
Harry Anderson died??? FUCK! I'm so sorry. Do you know what happened?
he passed away unexpectedly and silently in his sleep next to his two dogs and a wife who loved him in their peaceful, beautiful home in the mountains... and for someone who had such a horrendous and tumultuous introduction to this planet, i can think of no better way for him to have gone out... i just wish it hadn't been as soon as it was
Just a head's up... that guy you posted talking about psychology and marriage is named Jordan Peterson and he's kinda awful. He's a transphobic asshole for real and way more "traditional" than I would ever have imagined you being okay with.
when i was in high school, i used to picket gay pride parades... i'm sure that piece of news about me is extremely disappointing to hear, but it's true... i was inexperienced, young, ignorant, and just plain wrong... but even then, i deserved to be heard and loved as i made my way further out of the darkness and into the Light... also, you'd be surprised what you can learn when you're willing to listen to those you sometimes disagree with and that goes for everyone on all sides of all arguments... as they say, 'even a broken clock is right twice a day'
Does every human being need to have a purpose? Or is it OK to just be?
it's impossible to just 'be' in this world... your existence changes the atmosphere no matter what... how much or in what way, well that's up to you... but, ultimately, the world is this incredible playground that you're plopped into and you can just sit on the ground and look at everyone else trying out all the playground equipment, or you can go play... it's always your choice... and if you're writing on this page, then that means that you and i are connected in some way and i have never crossed paths with someone and not had it change my molecular makeup and life trajectory, so if your plan was to just 'be' in this world, i have bad news: it's too late, you've already changed the world, because you changed mine (and i'm so grateful for it)
Are you the only person that creates on this site? Will that always be true? If it's not true, will you have to change the site domain?
right now, i'm the only person posting, but i'm letting the site develop naturally, so who knows what it will become over time... i try not to constrict my future if i can help it
Are you saying you're not a Christian? I kinda thought you might not be, but then sometimes I think that you are. You're kinda ambiguous about a lot of things, actually.
i think that the word 'christian' means a lot of different things to a lot of different people, as do most labels, so i refuse to label myself as anything and let other people label me however they choose... and on a related note, groups in general scare me and i don't like joining or being a part of any group... the things that people will allow themselves and others to do in groups is pretty awful
I'm really sorry about Harry. He was a great dude and he'll always be remembered and missed. Some of my favorite memories are of you busting out with the Night Court theme on that shitty bass guitar at the old apartment. Anyway, sending you lots of love tonight.
thank you
What is your current journey?
to love myself, love others, be honest, stay curious, and keep growing... and this week, i'm thinking a lot about whether there might be a better way of doing those things between 9am and 5pm Monday through Friday than how/where i'm currently spending that time
Which member of the Captain Planet team am I? I want to be heart, but I don't want the monkey.
only you know what your special ring does and you don't pick your spirit animal, your spirit animal picks you... if you're lucky, you'll get some sort of weird alcoholic gremlin that winks at you every morning when you wake up and always wants to listen to Al Green records like i did
What should I have for dinner?
breakfast
tell me something Weird about you that very few people know about
sometimes i bite into oranges like apples in the shower and scrub my body with them
Do you follow Jesus? Muhammad? Buddha? Jim Carrey?
yes, and sometimes me and sometimes you and sometimes others
I have an area in my classroom called the "breathing tent" where kids can go anytime they feel overwhelmed and just need a time-out to calm themselves and get centered again. There are colorful pillows and noise cancelling headphones and a notebook you can write or draw in. Your website feels like the breathing tent of the internet.
thank you, that's really sweet and it means a lot to me
How can we help people do the right thing?
forgive them when they do the wrong thing
How old should kids be before they're allowed to use cuss words? Do you let your son use cuss words around you?
i have always found the phenomenon of humanity inventing certain words with the express purpose of making them taboo to be particularly confounding... that said, the way i've explained it to my son is this: every environment you enter has rules and consequences... it's your job to find out what the rules are and what the consequences are and then determine your own choices from there as to whether you want to follow the rules of the environment or not... as for my house, i will not be bothered if you say, "i absolutely love the shit out of you!" to someone (and mean it), but i will be incredibly disappointed if you were to say to someone, "i think your shirt is ugly"... one set of words is meant to build someone up and one is meant to tear them down, so i find one to be vulgar and the other not to be based on the intended outcome
I notice some sections are updated more often than others... how do you decide how/when to update? Do you have a schedule for posting?
i run the website, the website does not run me... this site is merely a place to report back on my findings, it's not the Finding... i hope to learn something new every day and be able to share that here, but i imagine that some days i'll have lots of things to share and some days not as much... i'll just ask/seek/knock the best i can and let the outcome of that work itself out in its own time
Who are the most important people in your life, and why?
there are many ways to answer this question and i feel like all of them would be 100% accurate, even though they'd all be different... each person that i'm with at any given time is the most important person in my life for that moment in time... my son is my Compass and without him i'd be truly adrift... i've lived in three different locations in my life and in each one, i've been blessed to be given a friend who has loved me for who i've been, who i am, and who i will be... and i've also recently been explosively inspired by someone enormously special-- the fruit of this creative union is apparent in the creation of this site and hopefully in many more ways to come
I think it's hilarious that we all begged you to start a blog years ago and you refused and then when you finally did, you've started like a half dozen blogs. You're ridiculously stubborn, but I love it. How do you decide what goes where? Like some of the things that make me laugh also make me think and some of the things that you have in 'revolt' make me ask myself questions and whatnot.
i never do things until the time is right, i guess, and i definitely don't do things just because people want me to do them, but it appears you're well aware of this... and i think if you think a bit more about my page and how it's set up, you'll learn something interesting about the fluidity of arbitrary categories
and you shall find.
yep... i always took the "ask/seek/knock" directive as another boring platitude until i actually started to ask a lot of questions, seek out answers, and knock on every door i could find... then i realized how powerful and true those words really are... i suppose another way of saying it is, "think, listen, act"
I've known you for a long time and you don't do things without an end game in mind... what's the end game on this website?
it's the same end game as i've had for every other project i've ever undertaken in my life: to gather all those with special rings and convince them to point their lights in the same direction so we can summon Captain Planet and heal the world
Okay, so when I clicked on "KNOCK" and it morphed into, "i'm proud of you", I legit started crying.
it's the truth
Hi!
!iH
Why did you leave me?
i don't know who is asking or if you're referencing leaving Facebook or if you're just teasing, so this is a tough question to answer, but... let's assume you're being serious just in case: i want the best for every person and in some cases, i learn over time that i am not the best for someone and so i let them go so that they can find what/who IS best for them... and (as far as i know) in every one of the few cases that i can think of where i've let someone go, they have found their Home... it's happened enough times that i sometimes joke that i'm a 'human layover' because i tend to help folks regroup and refuel and then make it to their final destination... and if that's my lot in life, i'm okay with that... it seems like an important and helpful Job
As you put more links on the front page, it looks like you're building a picture of something. Is it a robot or a person or something else? Actually, it could also be an angel and the "stay tuned for fresh wonder" is a halo?
sometimes i think all of existence is an infinite rorschach test
How many of these questions do you write yourself?
how many of these questions do You write yourself?
Why don't you have a mobile version of the site? The way it is now, I have to go out of my way to turn my phone sideways and zoom in and out to see anything.
if you look and listen carefully, you may notice that you might have answered your own question
How do you have time to do all the things that you do?
we all make time for the things that are important to us or for the things that we feel are urgent... the trick to getting more time is to not let others be time burglars convincing you that certain things are urgent when they are not... trust yourself to determine what is and is not urgent
Is censorship a good thing sometimes? Isn't it possible for all things to be good in some cases?
no
You've left Easter eggs all over this thing, haven't you? Tell me where they are! #notaquestion
it's not an easter egg hunt if i tell you where all the eggs are! also, this isn't a questions page, it's an area to ask, seek, and/or knock... there are lots of ways to do that and sometimes the question is an answer and sometimes the answer is a question
I doubt you'll comment publicly, but I guess I will ask/seek/knock anyway: what are your thoughts on the Zuckerberg hearings?
i believe Mark was chosen for an enormous Purpose and he lived that Purpose so well at first, but (like perhaps all of us given such an enormous Gift) he became immersed in his own reflection, took his eyes off the Ball and became more interested in his own power and less invested in the Mission... and then the Jokers came in and trashed the place... Mark deserves this spanking and i hope he uses this wake-up Call to turn things around, because the Team needs him back in the Game
Are you anti-capitalization?
i've actually always been a stickler/perfectionist towards my own use of grammar, punctuation, spelling, etc. even in personal text messages, but i'm trying to learn how to loosen up and relax a bit more these days and have found that writing in all lowercase is surprisingly calming to me in certain situations (this q&a section being one)
Why do elephants eat fermented fruit?
probably for the same reason that wallabies graze on poppy fields: they want to have a good time and don't have to worry about homelessness, job loss, societal pressure and/or calf custody hearings
I love you, Gracie!
i love you, too
I hope it's okay to say this and you don't have to post this, but... did you seriously forgive Zach? I don't know how I feel about that.
yes... everyone deserves a fresh start and i have every confidence that he'll make the most of his
Are you going to post about your kiddo here? I notice he doesn't have a link yet.
he is now of the age where he is going to make his own decisions (with the oversight of his dad and mom, of course) about what he chooses to post online, if anything... if/when he decides he'd like to post his own creative work online somewhere, i'll let you know... in the meantime, he's going to have some breathing room to grow up without a studio audience
I'm going to miss you on Facebook. You were most of the reason I logged on there every day. Not really a question... just the truth.
you're not the only person to tell me this and i appreciate it... it's also part of the reason i needed to leave... i felt guilty that i was pulling more folks into the lion's den... and actually, without the limitations of facebook, i can post way more here on my own site, so i really haven't gone anywhere, i've gone everywhere and you're welcome to come along with me
What made you decide to finally bite the bullet and start your own site?
i was inspired by running across someone even more free than i was and that made me want to become more free, too... i think that's how life works... as we become more and more free, we (unconsciously and consciously) inspire freedom in others